Wednesday, August 2, 2023
Talk Talk - It's My Life (Official Video)
Thursday, July 27, 2023
How you can change your world and the world around you
For all those who start their day by complaining--stop. Just stop. When you wake up, thank God for another day, get out of bed, and be glad that the only thing you have to deal with is a few minor aches and pains. Because that is not the case for a good number of people I know, who have different types of cancer of varying stages. Some will survive and some will not. They impress me with their will to just keep going, no matter what. They don't complain, or if they do, they do it privately. I know other people who have/had neurological diseases (multiple sclerosis, progressive parasupranuclear palsy, multiple systemic atrophy) that have taken/will take their lives. It's a slow gradual decline for most of them; they lose the ability to walk, to be mobile generally, to use their hands, to talk, to hold their heads up. It's terrible to watch people we love suffer in this way. I remember them each day and pray for them, as I try to do for all those I know who are seriously ill.
Show real respect for others. Listen. Don't interrupt others at every turn. Give your undivided attention to a child who wants your attention, likewise to an adult who wants the same. We all want to be noticed by others, to be valued and confirmed by others. As Mother Teresa said, charity and love begin at home. What does it profit the world if we help the needy on the street and turn our backs on or ignore those who are closest to us? Don't yell at others or shout them down. Don't belittle others. Too many people do this, thinking that if they raise their voices, they will be heard better. Don't insist on being right all the time, even if you know you are. LET IT GO. What difference does it make if you were correct about some unimportant thing? Were the consequences dire? Most likely they weren't. But we love to be right, to feel that we are better than others. Sometimes we are glad that we 'win' over others. But at what cost? Because if we constantly belittle others, they pay it forward by belittling others, to get rid of that bad feeling they have about themselves. Guaranteed, if you feel bad about yourself, you will try to make others feel bad about themselves as well. It's human nature and is often the first response unless you remember that a higher power is looking out for you, so that you know you are loved and valued.
Don't derive your self esteem or your sense of happiness from social media, television, or any other technology that seeks to suck most of your waking hours from you. Put them in their place. Use them wisely, but let them go otherwise. They are not important. They are a source of entertainment, but there are many ways (perhaps better ways) to enjoy yourself. Read a good book or magazine, read something that inspires you to be a better person. Read. Think about what you read. Write about what you're thinking about and feeling, if you are so inclined. Share what you write with others if you are so inclined. Write a card or a letter to someone who would like to hear from you. Pick up the phone and make a call to someone who would like to hear from you.
Believe in something larger than yourself--a higher power. It will give you perspective about yourself, a perspective that is sorely lacking in today's world. Find a religion, go to a church. Find yourself a congregation, a group of people who share your beliefs. Keep it simple. Don't expect answers to the mysteries of life and death. Just BE, in the company of others. It is immensely comforting.
Don't set out to change the world. Change yourself. As has been said before, be the change you want to see in others. If you change yourself, if you treat others with respect and kindness, it WILL make a difference in the world. Kindness and love are energies that induce the same in others, in the same way that unkindness and disrespect do. There is too much of the latter in the world. There has been a loss of personal boundaries that has led to a catastrophic disrespect for others, mostly due to social media and the hatred that is found there. I am appalled at times by the hatred I find there. I have begun to literally and figuratively walk away from all that is negative, destructive, or too dark because it brings the world closer to a hellish existence that benefits no one.
Tuesday, July 25, 2023
Updates on my blog--A New Yorker in Oslo and on my book--A Town and A Valley: Growing Up in Tarrytown and the Hudson Valley
Last month this blog had almost 41,000 visitors, most of them Americans. That is the highest number of visitors ever; I was overwhelmed by the sheer number of visitors. Thank you to everyone who has checked out the blog, read a few posts, and enjoyed what they've read. I've been told by several people that it's not possible to leave a comment on the individual posts; that's not true. If you'd like to leave a comment, you can. Please do, I enjoy hearing from readers.
My book, A Town and A Valley--Growing Up in Tarrytown and the Hudson Valley, was purchased by the Warner Library in Tarrytown and can be found in the Local History section. It has also been purchased by the Historical Society in Tarrytown. For those readers who would like to know more about the area of New York State where I was born and where I grew up, the book might be of interest to you. It can be purchased on Amazon:
Monday, July 24, 2023
Portsmouth, Salisbury, and the Isle of Wight--photos
where we stayed in Portsmouth |
Portsmouth harbor area |
the Bridge Tavern and the famous Spinnaker Tower to the right |
Portsmouth harbor area |
the HMS Warrior in Portsmouth Harbor |
Salisbury Cathedral |
Ryde Pier on the Isle of Wight |
scenic view on the Isle of Wight |
the Isle of Wight has its own white cliffs |
scenic view on the Isle of Wight |
scenic view on the Isle of Wight |
Friday, July 21, 2023
Traveling along the southeast coast of England
Wednesday, July 12, 2023
Time as a wheel with spokes
Friday, July 7, 2023
Morning games
Monday, July 3, 2023
The Reluctant Valedictorian
When I was together with my high school friends at the beginning of June, the talk inevitably turned to our high school years and some of the memories we have from those times. For my part, I would say that high school was quite okay but not much more than that. I'm thankful that my friendships with Janet, Judy and Laura were strengthened during those years; we remain friends to this day and make an effort to talk to and visit each other. I spent most of my high school years observing what went on around me, perhaps in preparation for my career as a scientist, which involves a lot of observation. I was book smart but not very street smart, perhaps natural for that age. But it seemed to me that so many of my fellow students were much more street smart. That came later for me, once I was in college and got to experience the urban environment of Fordham University.
Since I had the highest grades in my class, that led to my being the valedictorian. The privilege of being the valedictorian was that I got to deliver the valedictory--the farewell address to the graduating senior class. Suffice it to say that I did not look forward to holding this address at our graduation in front of hundreds of people--my classmates and their families. But I did it. One could say that I did it my way. I'm sure my speech irritated a number of parents who were politically conservative, since I chose to focus on Nixon and Watergate and the lack of ethics in politics. I said that I hoped that our graduating class would stand for ethical behavior in all we did in our future careers. I practiced that speech many times in front of my teachers, who were constructive in their criticism but who never told me that I couldn't say this or that. I'm glad that they allowed me to say what I wished to say, that I wasn't censored in any way. But still, I was reluctant to speak publicly--the reluctant valedictorian.
The dislike of public speaking followed me throughout my scientific career. I got better at it, and some of my lectures were downright inspired. I always remembered the words of Eleanor Roosevelt: 'you must do the thing you think you cannot do'. So I did. I faced my fear of public speaking, but I never grew comfortable with it and I never grew to like it. I don't like having all eyes on me. I do best in one-on-one conversations and small meetings. I don't know when I changed, because in grammar school and the first two years of high school, I had no problems with talking in class and being the center of attention. Somewhere along the line, it all changed and I don't know why. Ultimately, I came to prefer writing and sharing my writing, an avocation that I have pursued to this day. Writing is what I enjoy most. It's a way of putting myself out there that makes me feel comfortable. When I write, I'm not worrying about how vulnerable I am. I know that those who want to read what I write will do so; those who don't will go elsewhere. I'm comfortable with that.
Friday, June 30, 2023
The beauty of Colorado
After I visited Oregon, Judy and I flew to west Colorado to visit Janet, another high school friend (see my post from June 19th: A New Yorker in Oslo: I've been traveling (paulamdeangelis.blogspot.com). We did some walking in the vicinity of her home, and also took a day trip to Ouray. Here are some photos from Colorado:
the creek behind my friend's house |
irises growing in abundance along the walking path |
facing east with the Rocky Mountains in the distance |
the charming town of Ouray |
Ouray |
Ouray |
the road leading away from Ouray |
Monday, June 26, 2023
Update on my book: A Town and A Valley--Growing Up in Tarrytown and the Hudson Valley
Saturday, June 24, 2023
The beauty of Oregon
It's been over three weeks since I visited my friends Judy and John in Oregon. I've had time to reflect on my trip and how wonderful it was to be together. A short two-day trip, but truly memorable. I realize that life offers us opportunities to be together that don't really come again, at least not in the same way. They visited us here in Oslo last June, and this June I was able to visit them where they live in west Oregon. We were gifted our time together and I am very grateful for the gift. Time moves us steadily onward; we get older and perhaps the chances to be together will be less in the coming years. I hope not, God willing, but no one really knows for sure. I know many people my age who can no longer travel due to health problems; there are no guarantees, so it's best to take advantage of the opportunities as they arise.
We used a day to travel by car from west to east Oregon, driving from Portland to Mount Hood (about a fifty-mile drive), with a stop in Hood River to visit Paloma, who is the graphic designer for my books. While we were in Hood River, we also stopped and watched the kite surfers being whipped about by the wind on the Columbia River. We then drove on to Mount Hood and ate dinner at the Timberline Lodge that is located on the southern flank of Mount Hood. The lodge is a National Historic Landmark, and well it should be, after having watched the video about its construction. It was built between 1936 and 1938 as a WPA project during the Great Depression. One of its claims to fame is that Stanley Kubrick used outside views of the lodge in the supernatural horror film The Shining (1980).
The following photos don't really do these places justice, but they give some glimpses of the beauty of Oregon. Enjoy!
the view from the backyard of my friends' house |
view from The Vista |
Rowena Crest area |
view from Rowena Crest area |
Mount Hood |
Monday, June 19, 2023
I've been traveling
I've been traveling recently between several different time zones, and upon my return home, my body decided that it didn't know what time zone it was in, so it's been waking me up at 3 am to let me know that it's time to get up and start the day. The other night I had a long discussion with myself at 3 am about what electric bike I should buy, since I need a new one. Why my brain chose that time to ponder such a thing is beyond me. It got to the point where it suddenly felt extremely urgent that I make the decision right then and there. Of course when dawn arrived none of it seemed so urgent at all. I don't know why the middle of the night creates a sense of urgency out of nothing. It has happened many times before; I should make this or that plan, call this or that person, get done whatever needs to be done. The list is unbelievably long. There is something about the dark that inspires urgency. But when dawn arrives, and in the light of day, I'm more relaxed (thank God). I get what I need to get done, done. Just not at breakneck speed or with the feeling that I have a ton of weight on my shoulders.
But despite its effects on my body, I wouldn't give up traveling for all the money in the world. Because there are travel experiences that money will never be able to buy--time spent with good friends, scenery that will take your breath away, visits to historic places. No amount of wealth or material goods can replace those experiences. As the old saying goes, you can't take it with you. True, that. I like to travel light, in my daily wanderings and when I'm out in the world.
So where did I travel to this time? First, to Portland Oregon where my good friend Judy lives with her husband John and their sweet dog Coda. Portland is located in western Oregon; we drove into eastern Oregon one day, and the contrast between west and east is striking. Oregon is a beautiful state for sure, rich in forest tracts, mountains, valleys, rivers, gorges, and rolling hills, but also incredible desert plateaus. The Columbia River, known for its rough waters and high winds, runs through a gorge (canyon). Bounded on both sides by steep rocky walls, it creates its own weather. It's worth a trip there just to see the windsurfers and kite surfers (aka kiteboarders). The terminology may be confusing, but watching the surfers is pretty cool. Judy and I then traveled further on to Cedaredge Colorado where we visited with our friend Janet and her husband Richard. The original trip was planned as a reunion of four high school friends (the Fab Four as our English teacher used to call us), but one friend could not manage the trip, so the remaining three met and enjoyed our time together. We took a day trip to Ouray, which apparently is known as the 'Switzerland of America'. It is a charming, quaint, and historic mountain town bounded by canyons and mountains (the San Juan mountains). We ate lunch at the Goldbelt restaurant (very good food) and walked around the town, ending up at the Western Hotel (established in 1891) where we wandered around looking at the rooms, the dining room, and the saloon. It would have been lovely (and expensive) to stay there; perhaps on a future trip. In the 1870s, gold was found in the San Juan mountains, resulting in the establishment of small mining towns in the area. Ouray has the feel of a former mining town; it is now a tourist town that attracts visitors from all over the world.
I'd like to visit my friends again in a few years and explore more of Oregon and Colorado with them. The USA never ceases to amaze me; its fifty states offer vast differences in climate and topography. Each state has something beautiful to offer. America the beautiful, indeed. It is.
Monday, May 29, 2023
Navigators - Wall of Stone
to do the things you do
it's the end of the season
ain't nothing here for you
it's just a misunderstanding
another hole in the ground
the things you lost are all around you
another walk in the gutter
another weightless fall
another face in the mirror
it's just an endless crawl
and now you're stuck in the corner
ain't no easy way out
you're digging too deep
my friend
you're digging too deep
why don't you leave her all alone
you make a mess for everyone
why don't you leave her all alone
can't you see this wall of stone
and you can't go on much longer
it's just a question of time
it's just a misunderstanding
another downward climb
the circles keep getting smaller
and you go round and round
ain't nowhere left to turn
you're going underground
why don't you leave her all alone
you make a mess for everyone
why don't you leave her all alone
stuck behind your wall of stone
it really ain't no point in trying your wall without
sayin
goodbye to someone
you're holding on to all your fears
and all the things you'll never share with no one
in the night when he longs for the light he's gonna be
alright
why don't you leave her all alone
cause the road you're walking on
will never lead you home
why don't you leave her all alone
alone, alone
why don't you leave her all alone
you make a mess for everyone
why don't you leave her all alone
can't you see this wall of stone
you're digging too deep
my friend
you're digging too deep
Sunday, May 28, 2023
The end result of laziness
I'm all for giving away second-hand/used clothing to charitable organizations that distribute it to those in need. I do it myself a couple of times a year. For example, the Salvation Army and the Red Cross do a wonderful job with organizing this. Their numerous clothing bins are distributed around the city, and it doesn't really matter which organization you support when you deposit bags of clothing in the bins belonging to one of these organizations. The goal is to help others and to reuse clothing. But there reaches a point when enough is enough; when people are lazy and don't walk the extra distance to place clothing in a bin that's not completely full. The other thing they don't do is place the clothing they're giving away in a bag and seal it before they try to dump it in the bin. I walked by this bin the other day and became irritated. I thought, how can people be so lazy? I mean really, what does it cost them to walk a few blocks further to deposit their bags of clothing in another bin? But they won't do that, nor will they place the clothing in a bag before they deposit it. They'd rather that the bins end up looking like this--see photo below. I have to say that I just don't get it. No wonder sloth is one of the seven deadly sins. There is an awful lot of sloth in society, and by that I mean, an aversion to making active, conscious decisions to better oneself and society. Every time you litter or dump clothing willy-nilly wherever it suits you, every time you don't do what you should do for the good of all, you are being slothful. If you behave in this way, you cannot tell me that you love the people around you or your country. Quite the opposite. You are saying, 'I don't care about my neighborhood or my country'. You are saying 'I'm entitled to do as I please. Someone else can pick up after me'. And that is what happens most of the time. In my book, you are selfish and spoiled, in addition to being lazy. Because when I see these bins, I think of garbage bins. That's what you're essentially depositing in these bins--your garbage. It doesn't help these organizations one bit that they have to use their time cleaning up after you and sorting through what is useful and what is not. And it is not their fault that people are so incredibly shameless and lazy.
Monday, May 22, 2023
Bird tales
The arrival of spring means the return of birds to the garden, birds of all kinds. Sparrows, brown and black thrushes, crows, magpies, wagtails, robins (the European ones that are smaller than the American ones), ring-necked doves, and (Eurasian) blue tits. Sparrows are most prevalent and spend most of their time in one of two huge bushes in my garden, the kaiser bush and the red currant bush which are more or less opposite each other. When I am working in the garden I can hear them quarreling and chattering; they fly back and forth between both bushes, with stops at the birdbath to drink water and to take a communal bath. Watching them flap around together in the birdbath is a hoot. And when it's really been hot during past summers, they share the birdbath with the bees that line up on the rim to drink water.
This year there is a large crow that saunters around the garden like he (she) owns the place. My garden neighbor calls her Clara, so we assume it's a female bird. Clara struts and shows off for us; she is not afraid of very much. It is the neighborhood cats that are scared of her; she has chased them out of the garden on numerous occasions. This year she has discovered my neighbor's small stone birdbath that has been placed at ground level. Clara and several of the magpies enjoy drinking water and plucking insects from this birdbath. It's amusing to watch them. She sometimes walks around my garden as do the brown thrushes, looking for insects (mostly earthworms) to eat. The brown thrushes remind me of little dinosaurs; I call them the little raptors. They have a menacing look in their eyes that strikes me as primeval.
As I walk to and from the garden, I pass Kiellands plass with its large pluming fountains whose water descends via small successive waterfalls into at least six small pools lined with smooth medium-sized stones (NLA - Alexander Kiellands plass (landskapsarkitektur.no). Oslo's birds have discovered these pools, sharing them with small dogs and toddlers who like to wander down to the water's edge. Sometimes the dogs take a dip, but mostly the birds have the pools to themselves. They include mallard ducks, pigeons, and seagulls for the most part, but also thrushes and smaller birds. This morning on my way to the garden, a mother duck crossed the sidewalk in front of me followed by her five little ducklings. The UPS driver who was delivering a package nearby stopped to watch them as well, and we commented how sweet it was to see them. Here we are in the middle of a large city, and the ducks are raising their families here. Nature adapts to all sorts of situations and seems to do so readily; that is definitely the case for mallard ducks. There must be a reason that the ducks stay put; one of them must be that people feed them bread. But there are also droves of insects surrounding the water pools that you can see in the late afternoon summer sunlight, flitting about in the warmth. There are probably also a lot of earthworms and other ground insects. The ducks also eat seeds and the nearby plant matter (roots and tubers) that abound.
A less happy story is what happened to the magpie nest outside our bedroom window. The magpie couple spent a lot of time earlier this spring enlarging last year's nest of twigs and branches. The nest seemed to double in size and looked to be spread over two levels. This pair of birds comes back every year to raise their young. Alas, this year it was not to be. Last Wednesday, I heard a crack and took a look out the window; I had already guessed that it had something to do with the branch. The branch holding the nest had cracked off and fallen to the ground. My best guess is that the nest was too heavy and that the birds had built it too far out on the limb. This year's addition to the nest certainly did not help. I felt so bad for them; they don't always assess the situation correctly and this year they lost out. We don't know if there were eggs in the nest, but if there were, they were destroyed along with the nest. The birds disappeared for a few days, but yesterday morning I heard them chattering in the yard again. They'll be back next year, but there won't be any baby magpies this year unless they overtake an abandoned nest.
We are moving toward summer now--the season of sun, warmth, growth, new life, and easy days. I look forward to lounging in my garden and dozing off to the sound of bird chatter. It's a wonderful part of summer.
The Spinners--It's a Shame
I saw the movie The Holiday again recently, and one of the main characters had this song as his cell phone ringtone. I grew up with this mu...