Living life with a sense of humor

I read a good article in the New York Times this morning, where Pope Francis talks about the importance of having a sense of humor to get through life: https://www.nytimes.com/2024/12/17/opinion/pope-francis-humor.html?unlocked_article_code=1.iE4.W_bC.eFqE4vYNgQR-&smid=url-share

In another article that talked about his sense of humor, he mentioned the Prayer for Good Humor that has been attributed to St. Thomas More. He said that he prays it every day. I'm including it here. One thing I do know, and that is that a good laugh is the cure for a lot of aches, pains, and grumbles. When we pray for grace, perhaps we should pray for the gift of being able to laugh at ourselves and others via jokes and amusing anecdotes. I do not defend mocking others or making cruel fun of others as humor, just so that is clear; that is bullying behavior. The Pope talks about irony, which is my preferred form for humor. Irony, whether self-irony or irony directed at others, implies seeing the contradictions in different situations and being able to point them out in a humorous, sometimes sarcastic way. An ironical situation is one that is wryly amusing. We should be able to laugh at ourselves first, to see the comedy in what we do. That encourages others to do the same. 

Prayer for Good Humor

by St. Thomas More

Grant me, O Lord, good digestion, and also something to digest.

Grant me a healthy body, and the necessary good humor to maintain it.

Grant me a simple soul that knows to treasure all that is good

and that doesn’t frighten easily at the sight of evil,

but rather finds the means to put things back in their place.

Give me a soul that knows not boredom, grumblings, sighs and laments,

nor excess of stress, because of that obstructing thing called “I.”

Grant me, O Lord, a sense of good humor.

Allow me the grace to be able to take a joke to discover in life a bit of joy,

and to be able to share it with others.

If you read one article today, make it this one

I'm gifting my readers this article written by Thomas L. Friedman that was published yesterday in The New York Times--How We've Lost Our Moorings as a Society. It's an important opinion piece and it clearly resonated with many readers (just take a look at the Comments section). I hope the article makes you think about where the USA is going as a nation. We need to wake up before it's too late. Our future depends on it.

https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/28/opinion/trump-civility-society.html?unlocked_article_code=1.vk0.Maax.uk9wgGLn_2hg&smid=url-share

Queen Bee

I play The New York Times Spelling Bee game each day. There are a set number of words that one must find (spell) each day given the letters for that day. If you make all of the words, you achieve Queen Bee status. It's not often that happens because most of the time it's impossible to find all the words. It's happened to me only once before. And then again today. Small things make me happy as today's spelling game was difficult. 

A world of possibilities

At 93, Teaching Me About Possibility - The New York Times (nytimes.com)

Richard Morgan wrote this article for the Modern Love section of The New York Times. It was published on December 22, 2023. I ran across it today and found it to be a wonderfully-written and touching article about a middle-aged man living in New York who decides to really get to know his grandmother who lives in England. It is their story and he tells it beautifully. There are so many little points that are made that will stick with you, especially the points his grandmother makes. The importance of kindness is one. The importance of trying is another. Looking at the world as full of possibilities is yet another. A wise woman, his grandmother. You'll enjoy reading about them both. 

His grandmother tells him one thing during one of his visits:

“Age,” she told me once, “is just another bother attempting to convince you of the impossible in a world absolutely blooming with possibilities.” 

I absolutely love this. No matter how you interpret the definition of 'possibilities', and I know it's individual for each person, it is such a freeing statement, as statements coming from a place of love and kindness always are. Lovely, reminding me of a flourishing garden. It says that despite getting older, there are always possibilities for so many things--new travel adventures, new hobbies to pick up, new books to read (or write), new music to listen to, new people to meet. And so on. We don't stop living when we get older or old. Yes, there are more physical limitations, but one can still enjoy life to the fullest. It's about getting up every day and being grateful for another day of life. A day full of possibilities.  

A good article that resonated with me

If you read one good article today, make it this one: Opinion | How to be Human - The New York Times (nytimes.com)  David Brooks, the author, writes about 'illuminators and diminishers', describing them in some detail in his article The Essential Skills for Being Human.      

The world sorely needs more illuminators and fewer diminishers. It needs more good listeners, more nurturers, more doers, and fewer narcissists and incessant talkers who never get around to doing anything at all. It needs more coaches who build others up, and fewer complainers and naggers who wear others down. It needs more people who care about others in the best way possible. 

You know when you've been in the presence of an illuminator. You feel energized (re-energized), hopeful, encouraged, and seen (as in recognized for who you are--validated). You feel as though a warm light, a warm ray of sunshine, has shone down upon you. You also know when you've been in the presence of a diminisher, because you feel de-energized, pessimistic, fearful, and invisible. Darkness has replaced the warm sunshine, and a cold wind blows. Diminishers are narcissists first; if you are looking for any type of validation from them, you can forget it. Your self-esteem around a diminisher will suffer a lot, which can be very detrimental for some people. 

Diminishers are controlling types, the type of people who say the following: 

• I wouldn't do it that way.  (in other words, Do it my way)
• I would never do that. You're wasting your time.  (I wouldn't waste my time)
• You shouldn't do that or feel that way.  (I don't do that or feel that way)
• It will never work out.  (So why bother? Don't waste your time)

Diminishers are only happy when others are fearful, or remain in a place of fear. Illuminators want to lift those around them out of fear into a place of light and peace. Illuminators compliment and build others up. Diminishers do the opposite. When you are happy about something, they are more likely to try to burst your balloon rather than let you be happy. They'll find a way to do it, to needle you, to get under your skin, to try to control you, to try and make you feel bad about yourself and what you do. They are invested in trying to bring you down. They try to control your choices, and when they realize that they cannot, they will try to whittle you 'down to size' if they are in the presence of someone strong enough to stand up to them. Why do diminishers behave the way they do? They diminish others because they suffer from envy, from dissatisfaction with their own lives, and from low self esteem, even if it seems the opposite is true when they are always talking about how great their own lives are. They are really focused on the lives of others, gossiping about them, complaining about them, trying to control them, competing with them in an unhealthy way, because their own lives border on unhappy or miserable. Does that mean we should have empathy for diminishers? Yes. But it does not mean that we should sacrifice our peace of mind and soul for them. Illuminators do not require your obedience, loyalty, servitude, or submissiveness. They understand what real love is, and they practice it.

I have been blessed in my own life to know many illuminators; I have wonderful longtime friends whom I love and who love me. My husband has been an illuminator for me and many people he's worked with--a true coach. But I also have experienced diminishers, and trust me, before you understand who and what they are, you will feel diminished by them. Less than your usual self. Until you regain your strength, your energy, your true sense of self. No one can destroy you once you know who you truly are. And sometimes being your true self is a lonely road when you're surrounded by diminishers. But it's a far better road, and in the end, you'll have outpaced them and left them behind in the dust. 

Morning games

I have a certain daily routine that I follow for the most part when I get up each day. There's breakfast to be made and eaten and washing-up afterward, and all of the other odd household chores that nag at me for my attention. But when they're done and I have some time to myself, I sit down with my laptop and open Wordle; after Wordle come Spelling Bee, Digits, and finally Connections. These games are all found under the Games section of The New York Times, for which I have a digital subscription. I have become a devotee of these games and look forward to new ones each day. Wordle is an online word game in which players are given six attempts to guess a five-letter word. Everyone has heard about Wordle; Josh Wardle, who created it for his partner, sold it to The New York Times for a low-seven figure sum. There are Wordle chat forums and AI chatbots that will analyze your moves for you after you have finished. Spelling Bee is a word puzzle game that challenges players to form words using a set of seven letters; these letters are arranged in a honeycomb with the center letter highlighted in yellow. The center letter must be used in all words formed and all words must be four letters or more. The game offers Hints to players, informing them of how many total words there are for that day, how many pangrams, and what the first letters are for the words in question. It would be a much more difficult game without the Hints, but of course that's the challenge. Even with the Hints, it can be a tough nut to crack. So there is something about reaching the rank of 'Genius' in Spelling Bee that floats my boat, likewise for Digits, a daily math puzzle game where you can use any combination of numbers to reach the target number. There are five daily target numbers to reach. It's fun and challenging and not as easy as one might think. And finally there is the game Connections (currently in beta form); it presents players with sixteen words that have to be grouped into four groups according to similarity/commonality, e.g. names of colleges or types of vegetables. 

I've learned that the best thing to do when I get stuck at any point is to take a break and come back after an hour or so. For some reason that always helps. Apparently there are millions of people each day who play these games and I understand why. They're fun, and they draw on one's vocabulary and/or ability to be brain-flexible. Sometimes I find myself really 'reaching' to come up with words in Spelling Bee or Wordle, but that's the fun part--meeting the challenge. 

A very good opinion piece--'We will look back on this age of cruelty to animals in horror' by Ezra Klein

Opinion | We Will Look Back on This Age of Cruelty to Animals in Horror - The New York Times (nytimes.com)

After I read this article, which was hard to read but worth reading, I made a promise to myself to try to cut the amount of meat I eat in half. I do eat fish, but try to eat only fish that swim freely in the ocean. I do not eat farmed salmon, only wild salmon. Norway is a major fish farming nation, especially for salmon; we're talking big business, I am no fan of fish farms; I do not support them because of the crowded conditions for the farmed salmon. It surprises me that the same people who are up in arms about the crowded conditions for chickens and livestock do not get just as upset about the crowded and unnatural conditions for farmed salmon. 

A few years ago I started to divide in two the packages of meat I buy, mostly chicken and ground beef, so that one package that used to provide food for one dinner, now yields two dinners. These are the ways I have begun to cut down on my/our meat consumption. 

I would be perfectly happy eating much less meat than I do at present. But when one makes meals for a family, one has to consider the wishes of all involved. I have tried meat substitutes--plant-based sausages and the like, but my husband does not like them. I do like them, however. I have tried plant-based cold cuts, and they are pretty good. And I could happily subsist on anything made from chickpeas. I love hummus and falafel and eat them as often as I can. Baked eggplant is a good substitute for a meat dinner; it is delicious served over rice. I do like cheese so that would be hard to give up completely; the same is true for canned tuna fish (I love canned tuna but I know that tuna are overfished. But at least they are not farmed). What I'd like to try is laboratory-produced meat (producing a chicken breast, etc, from a chicken cell--that sounds promising, at least at present). 

I think we just need to start somewhere. We need to rethink meal planning and the importance of eating less meat for all the reasons listed in the article, but also to improve our health. We don't need to eat the amount of meat we eat currently to survive. Our parents' generation managed to live on much less meat, and we can too. I am including a link to a short pamphlet that one can download from World Animal Protection; it's called Meating Halfway and it's worth downloading. You have to join the #EatLessMeat this Year movement in order to download it:

World Animal Protection | We move the world to protect animals

Show your support for Net Neutrality

Show your support for Net Neutrality. Took me 2 minutes to do this.

1. On your computer, not your phone! - go to: www.fcc.gov/ecfs/filings/express
2. Enter under Proceeding 17-108.
3.Under Filer, enter your name and press enter
4. In comments, say you support Title 2 oversight of internet service providers. Also say that you support net neutrality.
*Fill in the form carefully; they've made it less friendly and impossible to fill in by phone, on purpose.
*Don't be silenced. Do it now. Pass it on.

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Read about why you need to support Net Neutrality in this excellent article in The New York Times today:

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/29/technology/internet-dying-repeal-net-neutrality.html?_r=0

An article worth reading--How Republics End--by Paul Krugman

A rather depressing article about the state of affairs in my home country, but important to read nonetheless, even in this season of cheer. More and more, I find less and less to feel cheery about. I feel as though the world is moving toward a dark place, one that we'll not be returning from. Perhaps that's how some people felt before the two world wars of the last century. I don't know. I cannot always trust my feelings to be correct (luckily), but I cannot shake the small feeling of doom that I walk around with each day. And this article merely confirms those feelings. I carry on doing all the daily tasks I've been doing for so long, but they are without much meaning. It is far more important to me now to make sure that friends and family are fine, that I have good connections with them, and that I have plans in place to see them. Because in the end, no matter what happens in the world, the only thing that matters is the people you love and who love you. Work falls away (and it won't bother me a bit), material things matter less, and it becomes important to do something positive with the assets one has accumulated through the years.  

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/12/19/opinion/how-republics-end.html?smid=fb-nytimes&smtyp=cur&_r=0

An article worth reading--An American in a Strange Land by Jim Yardley

America in 2016--how did we get here?

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/06/magazine/an-american-in-a-strange-land.html?hp&action=click&pgtype=Homepage&clickSource=story-heading&module=mini-moth&region=top-stories-below&WT.nav=top-stories-below

Nothing Remains: David Bowie's Vision of Love---an article by Simon Critchley

A very good article in the New York Times Opinion Pages about David Bowie and his music, written by Simon Critchley. Well worth reading.......


http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2016/01/11/nothing-remains-david-bowies-vision-of-love/?WT.mc_id=2016-JANUARY-OTB-INTL_AUD_DEV-0101-0131&WT.mc_ev=click&ad-keywords=IntlAudDev&_r=0