A New Yorker in Oslo: July 2018

Monday, July 30, 2018

Back in New York City

It takes a while, but I do get used to this noisy, pulsating, crowded city again after a day or two. I cannot believe that I worked in Manhattan for seven years before I moved to Norway. I commuted by bus and subway each day into and out of Manhattan from the New Brunswick area of New Jersey. I remember clearly that I had a routine and knew all the shortcuts--how to get around the always-present crowds--and if I drove my car on chance occasions, I knew which shortcuts to use to get me more quickly across Central Park over to the East side (York Avenue) where I used to work.

I can't say that I miss the city, but it is a part of me. What I do like here is the diversity of people--the heterogeneity; people of all races and from all walks of life. It truly is a melting pot, and it all seems to work for the most part. What struck me this morning when I ate breakfast at Starbucks, is how many people held the entrance doors open for other people. How polite, and nice to see. And last night I went to mass at St. Malachy's Church on West 49th street; not only was the mass a good experience, but we sang songs that I haven't sung in ages (probably not since I was a teenager). So that by itself was nice, and just what I needed after a long day.

And of course there are the men hawking their wares on the sidewalks, as well as begging. New York City wouldn't be the same without them. One of them stopped me right around the corner from the church, and asked me for money to buy a milkshake at McDonalds. I had just been inside to purchase a large Coke, so I offered him my Coke, but he wanted a milkshake instead. I had to smile, as he told me that he had craved a milkshake all day. So what to do but give him the money to buy his milkshake. It's little moments like those that make me remember that the world is not, and never will be, perfect. There will always be those who have less (or nothing) than others, and those who have way more than they will ever need or use. The priest last night spoke about generosity; about giving even if you don't feel you have enough to give. It's the giving that counts, not the amount (of money, time, listening, caring) given. It's a generous heart that matters most. New York City is a reminder of that and so much more. I'm glad I don't work in the city anymore, but I am glad for the reminders that this city gives me to remain awake and open to the people around me.

Quotes about gratitude

If the only prayer you said in your whole life was “thank you” that would suffice. --Meister Eckhart
We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives. --John F. Kennedy
Be grateful for what you already have while you pursue your goals. If you aren’t grateful for what you already have, what makes you think you would be happy with more. --Roy T. Bennett
True happiness is to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future, not to amuse ourselves with either hopes or fears but to rest satisfied with what we have, which is sufficient, for he that is so wants nothing. --Seneca
The greatest blessings of mankind are within us and within our reach. A wise man is content with his lot, whatever it may be, without wishing for what he has not. --Seneca
This a wonderful day. I’ve never seen this one before. --Maya Angelou
When we give cheerfully and accept gratefully, everyone is blessed. --Maya Angelou
A sense of blessedness comes from a change of heart, not from more blessings. --Mason Cooley
May the work of your hands be a sign of gratitude and reverence to the human condition. --Mahatma Gandhi
As long as this exists, this sunshine and this cloudless sky, and as long as I can enjoy it, how can I be sad? --Anne Frank
In ordinary life, we hardly realize that we receive a great deal more than we give, and that it is only with gratitude that life becomes rich. --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude. --G.K. Chesterton
I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder. --Gilbert K. Chesterton
We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorns have roses. --Alphonse Karr
I was complaining that I had no shoes till I met a man who had no feet. --Confucius
Ingratitude is the daughter of pride. --Miguel de Cervantes

Practicing gratitude

I recently posted the following image on Facebook as it resonated with the way I feel these days about people who complain constantly--about everything--a never-ending stream of dissatisfaction, irritations, and unhappiness.

It strikes me as fairly odd that people would rather spend their days complaining instead of being grateful for what they have. And I don't just mean material wealth or possessions, although they would be something to be grateful for. I mean being grateful for the gift of another day--grateful that you woke up, because there are people who were close to me, my brother for one, who did not get that chance--who died young. Or friends who were once able to walk and can no longer because of their illness. We should be grateful for the chance to start over each day, to start anew, pursue a long-held dream, fulfill a half-finished project, or start a new one. We should be grateful for our spouses, our parents, our children, and our friends--all those who mean the world to us. But we are often too busy looking at our cell phones, or watching TV, or working too much, or arguing too much about inconsequential things. We don't appreciate the silence and peace of our minds and hearts, which remind us to slow down and take a good look at our lives. Because if we did slow down and look at our lives, we would see how blessed we are--material goods, shelter, a job, money, family, friends, and good health--all things that many of us take for granted, but that millions of people in the world don't have. So like the picture says, essentially, if you're not satisfied, do something to make yourself satisfied, and for God's sake, shut up and stop complaining about what you don't have. Money and material possessions aren't everything. Yes, it's nice to have them, and yes, we've worked hard for what we have, but there is no automatic guarantee of entitlement. I know people who have worked hard all their lives who ended up with very little to show for it. Ironically, it is not those people who complain ad nauseam. My experience is that it is those with the most who complain the most, and who are never satisfied; they always want more. The Norwegians have a good expression for it--"mye vil ha mer" (much wants more). Let's practice gratitude today. We can start by getting out of bed with gratitude in our hearts for having been given another day on this earth, and for being thankful for what we do have.

Sunday, July 29, 2018

Quotes about disappointment

A part of life--disappointment. How we handle it affects our relationships, successes, failures and future expectations. I have gotten better at handling disappointment. I have also learned to deal with people and situations that continually disappoint me. If I can never count on another person to be there for me, if I am continually disappointed by them, my heart and soul adjust and move on. It's not a question of forgiveness; forgiveness is always there. But I know that I cannot depend on certain people for stability, constancy, generosity of spirit, or help. Sometimes it is not their fault; other times it's simply that they do not know themselves well enough to know what the rest of us know--that they promise more than they can ever deliver. They have false views of themselves. I know that, and I lower my expectations with those people. Eventually however, those people end up consigned to the outer reaches of my heart. Perhaps that is not so surprising. But they remain in my heart because I hold onto the hope that one day they will 'see' the light.

“Don’t let today’s disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow’s dreams.”

― Unknown

“There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love.”

― Martin Luther King, Jr.

“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”

― Martin Luther King, Jr.

“Disappointment to a noble soul is what cold water is to burning metal; it strengthens, tempers, intensifies, but never destroys it.”

– Eliza Tabor

“The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way.”

― Robert Kiyosaki

“If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment.”

– Henry David Thoreau

“Anytime you suffer a setback or disappointment, put your head down and plow ahead.”

― Les Brown

“Disenchantment, whether it is a minor disappointment or a major shock, is the signal that things are moving into transition in our lives.”

― William Throsby Bridges

“If I am to meet with a disappointment, the sooner I know it, the more of life I shall have to wear it off.”

― Thomas Jefferson

“We must all suffer one of two things: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret or disappointment.”

― Jim Rohn

“The principles of living greatly include the capacity to face trouble with courage, disappointment with cheerfulness, and trial with humility.”

― Thomas S. Monson

“Enthusiasm is followed by disappointment and even depression, and then by renewed enthusiasm.”

― Murray Gell-Mann

Bumblebees and lavender

I've planted a lot of lavender plants in the garden, and the bees--both honeybees and bumblebees--love them. There are always a lot of them hovering over the plants, flitting from one flower to the other. When I am weeding the flower garden, I can often hear the bumblebees' characteristic buzz; neither they nor the honeybees are aggressive in any way. I call it peaceful coexistence in the garden. They don't like it very much when I water the flowers, but they deal with it. I took a video of the bumblebees enjoying the lavender......Enjoy!

Saturday, July 28, 2018

Peaceful night on the boat

Before I left for the States, my husband and I took a short boat trip out to one of the islands in the inner Oslo fjord, an island called Borøya that lies right outside of Sandvika in the Bærum municipality. It is a nature reserve, so there are no summer cottages built there as there are on many of the other islands in the inner Oslo fjord. We ended up staying overnight on the boat in the cove area of the island that is known as Labukta. We've never walked around the island on our previous overnight stays, so that's something I'd like to do the next time we take a trip out there.

It was a lovely evening, peaceful and warm. We watched the night sky for a while before we went to sleep; of interest these days since Mars' orbit is very close to the Earth right now. It was possible to see Mars in the night sky, but not possible to capture it in pictures. But I did get a nice photo of the night sky:

When we left the next morning, I took a few photos of the surrounding area:

Labukta

July garden update

The months of June and July have been exceptionally sunny, hot and dry months here in Norway, with temperatures in the mid- to high-80s (F) and very little rain. This is aberrant summer weather for this country in terms of the prolonged periods with high temperatures, and while most Norwegians (and I) are happy because we can finally enjoy a real summer uninterrupted by chilly spells and long periods with rain, most of the farmers are not happy because the dryness has led to crop failure and little food for the cows. The wheat and grain fields are dry and have turned brown, and we noticed the same thing in England and Ireland when we traveled there in early July. Ireland was not a green country as is so often said about it, not this year. Northern and Western Europe are covered by a heat dome, as is the western part of the United States (think California and the devastating forest fires in Riverside). The intense heat and dryness have led to forest fires in northern Sweden and in the forests on the border of Norway and Sweden. There have also been devastating forest fires in Greece with considerable loss of life. The contrast of Norway and northern Europe with New York State is striking; when I arrived here on Thursday and took the train from Manhattan to Tarrytown, I was struck by how green and lush the landscape was, especially when I looked across the Hudson River to the Palisades. Elsewhere, the lawns, bushes and trees in Tarrytown are green without a hint of brown. There has clearly been a substantial amount of rainfall in New York State.

My garden has done very well despite the dryness and lack of rain. We are allowed to water it with a garden hose every other day; on the off days we use large watering cans to water. The tomato and mini-cucumber plants need a lot of water each day, otherwise the rest of the garden can actually survive two or three days without water, but I choose not to let it go that long. Most of the vegetables I've planted are at least three weeks ahead of schedule--pumpkins, corn, snap peas, and string beans. Passersby joke that Halloween will be coming early this year, in September, when they see the size of my pumpkins. We had a bumper crop of red currants, black currants, gooseberries and raspberries this year, but not strawberries, which prefer cooler and wetter conditions. We've frozen down most of the berries, but I did make red currant jelly and juice concentrate. This is also the first year that I've tried growing potatoes, and it worked, so next year, I will be planting more of them. This has been an amazing year for the garden; I doubt we'll have another one like it, but you can never say never, because climate change is here to stay.

Here are some July photos of the garden:

gooseberries (stikkelsbær)

red currants (rips)

black currants (solbær)

potatoes (Folva type)

Friday, July 27, 2018

A good song by the Greenhornes ft. Holly Golightly--There is an End

Whenever I travel to the States, I use the time on the plane to catch up on music I haven't heard in a while, and on films that I haven't seen. On this trip, I listened to this song There is an End by the Greenhornes featuring Holly Golightly (from Broken Flowers Soundtrack). The lyrics are poetry, and such songs always make a deep impression on me........

Castle Leslie Estate

On our recent trip to Ireland, we stayed at the Castle Leslie Estate for one night, and can highly recommend it. If you want to get away from the stress of the world for a while, this is the place to do so. The castle itself and the surrounding 1,000-acre estate is located in the village of Glaslough, a few miles northeast of Monaghan town in County Monaghan, Ireland, and less than 100 miles from Dublin. For more detailed information about the history of Castle Leslie, I refer you to their website: https://www.castleleslie.com/life-the-way-its-supposed-to-be/historical-castle-ireland/ . To quote from their website:

Life, the way it’s supposed to be…
Castle Leslie Estate in County Monaghan is nestled on 1,000 acres of undulating Irish countryside, dotted with ancient woodland and glittering lakes. It is one of the last great Irish Castle estates still in the hands of its founding family. Since the 1660s the distinguished and somewhat individual Leslie family have lived on the Estate. They have welcomed everyone from politicians to poets, ambassadors to ufologists to world renowned celebrities.

It is here that Paul McCartney and Heather Mills got married and had their reception, as we learned when we were there. Not that this information would have changed anything for me. But after that event, the Castle Leslie apparently became even more popular. So I was surprised when we actually were able to book a room there. The other surprising thing is that for the luxury offered, the prices are affordable. This is a nice weekend getaway for a couple looking to spend time together. There are no TVs in the rooms, which is a blessing in and of itself. We stayed in the Green Room, which has its own history; you can read more about it here: https://www.castleleslie.com/accomodation/green-room/ . This room had a lovely expansive view of the grounds and the lake from the large bay windows.

We arrived early in the afternoon, and had time for a walk around the lake before dinner. It's possible to fish in the lake; one of the guests checking out at the same time as us had caught a couple of pike. I'm not sure what he did with them. After a very good dinner at Snaffles Restaurant, we had coffee in the courtyard fountain garden, and then walked around the castle rooms and the grounds. The rooms are beautifully-decorated, Victorian style, with lovely tapestries and furniture. The photos that I took don't do justice to the Castle and the surrounding estate, but I'm posting them here so that you get an idea of how lovely this place is. On the night we were there, even though it didn't rain, a rainbow appeared in the sky across the lake--perhaps showing us where the pot of gold might be if we were so inclined to pursue and find it. Or maybe it was just another sign that a little bit of heaven could be found here at this estate.