Showing posts with label reflections. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reflections. Show all posts

Friday, March 15, 2024

Trying to understand the mystery of life

Apropos my last post, where I talked about accepting some things in this life (like my faith) that I know I will never understand on this earth; Henry Miller wrote about his way of looking at the world and trying to understand the mystery of life. He came to the conclusion that he would never understand everything, but that didn't stop him from trying. That's a beautiful way of looking at the world. 

He wrote: 

I have a theory that the moment one gives close attention to anything, even a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself. I have tried this experiment a thousand times and I have never been disappointed. The more I look at a thing, the more I see in it, and the more I see in it, the more I want to see. It is like peeling an onion. There is always another layer, and another, and another. And each layer is more beautiful than the last.

This is the way I look at the world. I don't see it as a collection of objects, but as a vast and mysterious organism. I see the beauty in the smallest things, and I find wonder in the most ordinary events. I am always looking for the hidden meaning, the secret message. I am always trying to understand the mystery of life.

I know that I will never understand everything, but that doesn't stop me from trying. I am content to live in the mystery, to be surrounded by the unknown. I am content to be a seeker, a pilgrim, a traveler on the road to nowhere. ~Henry Miller

(from Henry Miller's book: Black Spring)

Sunday, March 10, 2024

Odds and ends, part two

As I get older, I am more willing to accept that I won't get the answers I seek, particularly where faith is concerned. Faith is a mystery that I will never truly decipher. My faith in God has wavered from time to time up through the years. Ditto for my desire to attend Sunday mass. But I've realized that I won't get firm proof that God exists; he/she is not going to suddenly appear before me (like in the story of doubting Thomas) and convince me that way. So I accept God's existence on faith. Attending mass is similar; I go, no matter how I feel. Ten to fifteen years ago, I often wondered why I should go to mass when so many things seemed to be topsy-turvy in my life and definitely in the world. Not anymore. It's become something I do without thinking about it too much. That works for me. I like being there, being part of something larger than me. Being together with (presumably) like-minded people, in the sense that they are also believers. Even if they aren't, it wouldn't change my wanting to be there. I've realized that I can just offer up who I am on any given day--happy, sad, moody, bored, angry, irritable--and hope that I am acceptable. Being human means being imperfect. That is my reality, even though I try hard each day to be the best version of myself (as Matthew Kelly says). 

I watched the film Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret from 2023 last night. It's a touching, funny and sweet story about a twelve-year old girl on the cusp of adolescence, and how she deals with life at home and in school. The film is based on the book of the same name by Judy Blume; I never read it when it was published back in 1970. Margaret is the daughter of an interfaith marriage--Jewish father and Catholic mother, but neither of her parents are religious and they have chosen to raise Margaret without any religious affiliation. She does however hope to eventually find some sort of religion to belong to. She is assigned a school project that allows her to explore different religious beliefs, which she hopes will give her some idea of what religion to eventually embrace. She does talk to God however, telling him about all the things that are happening in her life and sharing her joys as well as disappointments. Abby Ryder Fortson did a wonderful job as Margaret, as did Rachel McAdams as her mother and Kathy Bates as her grandmother.

I also watched the film Dog from 2022 with Channing Tatum the other night--also very good. He played a former Army Ranger suffering from PTSD who wants to return to military duty but whose superiors deny him that chance due to his condition. However, he agrees to bring his former partner's dog Lulu to his funeral (he has committed suicide) as part of a deal for him to return to active duty. Lulu is anxiety-ridden and aggressive (suffering from a kind of PTSD too) and destined for eventual euthanization, and the trip from Oregon to Arizona is fraught with different problems and troubles along the way. It's a beautiful story about the bond that forms between man and dog, and how they both save each other. 

I've spent the past four days without tv news of any kind to invade my life. Bliss. I don't want to know what's going on in the world because I know it's the same old, same old--wars, aggression, conflicts, shootings, murders, political divisiveness--the list is long. And the news media love reporting it all; sometimes I get the feeling that 'the worse, the better'. I know that's cynical, but hey, the news media are cynical institutions. You get back what you give. 

I haven't been on social media much either. Also bliss. I don't really miss it. As I've written about before, I'd remove myself from most of it if it wasn't for the fact that friends in the US still use it. It's a way of staying in touch with them, although these days we mostly chat via Messenger and WhatsApp. 

Tuesday, March 5, 2024

The scowlers

I could have entitled this post The Scowls. The furious looks. The dissatisfied men. Two angry men--Donald Trump and Tucker Carlson. Because they are angry. But why are they angry? What do they have to be angry about? They are two very wealthy men. They are privileged. They live in a rareified atmosphere that few will ever experience. They don't have to get their hands dirty. They can do what they want when they want. Tucker Carlson once worked for Fox News until he cost them more than they could reasonably defend. Ah yes, Donald Trump--well, what is there to say? He speaks for the common man, Donald Trump does. He knows what it's like to walk into a grocery store and pay through the nose for food. He knows what it's like to struggle to pay a mortgage. He knows what it's like to be a common everyday man or woman. 

I am simultaneously fascinated and repelled by their public displays of anger. Who are these men fooling? Certainly not me. When I look at these photos, I have to laugh. Can you imagine having to live with them? Wake up with them each day, looking at their sour pusses? Dealing with their feigned anger? Heaven forbid. And yet, people are drawn in by their theatrics. They believe their empty promises and lies. 

These two men come to mind whenever I need good examples of grumpy old men and scowlers. They've perfected the art of scowling. I'm not sure if Trump's scowling will net him a second term. Carlson has more to scowl about after his embarrassing interview with Putin and his debacle at Fox. But why doesn't their wealth make them smile? Since they're all about the money, I would have thought their money would have made them happy, much like Scrooge and Scrooge McDuck. 

Perpetually-angry people bring to mind the Aesop fable The Boy Who Cried Wolf. The shepherd boy kept 'crying wolf' (lying) about a wolf attacking his sheep, and the townspeople always rushed to help him.  But when he cried wolf once too often, they got tired of his false alarms. One day a wolf really did show up to attack and devour the sheep and the townspeople ignored his cries for help. Perpetually-angry people should realize that their constant yelling will make others lose interest and sympathy. Maybe some people like listening to the same manic complaining every day, but most of us don't. We learn to ignore them and their anger. As a friend of mine used to say to her husband (now ex-husband) when he yelled at her for trivial reasons--'I don't hear you any better when you yell'. I feel the same way. If you raise your voice to me, I quietly consider my options. I can tune you out while you're yelling; I'm a master at it from my schooldays. Or I can leave the room. I simply don't want to hear what you have to say. And that includes angry politicians and tv personalities and their nonsense. 









Saturday, March 2, 2024

Odds and ends and updates

During Lent last year I read the New Testament and was glad I did. I am trying to read the Old Testament this time around, but it's tougher going. It's really about vengeance, an eye for an eye, the victims wanting the victimizers to suffer and wanting God to avenge them. There are prayers to God for exactly that. It's also an interesting history of the area and time that led up to the life of Christ. One thing I can state with certainty--the atmosphere of the Old Testament is just about the polar opposite of that in the New Testament. I prefer the latter. 

The world is not fair, even though deep down we expect it to be. That expectation hits the wall of disappointment time and again during our lifetimes, but we do not give up the hope that one day justice will prevail. However, I don't find myself praying for vengeance on those who have wronged me. Somehow, that in itself feels wrong. But I do find myself rather happy when 'what goes around comes around' for some people. Karma is a bitch sometimes. 

I am trying to curtail my involvement in all things digital. I am taking stock of what gives me the greatest joy, and it is hands down writing this blog. I've been writing it for almost fourteen years now and have not grown tired of it. So I'll continue writing and posting. I remain on Facebook because I live abroad and it is a way of staying in touch with my American friends from childhood, school days, and previous jobs. I post updates now and then, but nowhere near as often as I used to do. I am also on Twitter and am considering closing my account there; I use it to promote my books, but it hasn't been very helpful in that regard. Otherwise, it is a forum that purports to present all sides of an issue, but who can really tell if that is true anymore? Sadly, what is presented there just doesn't 'ring true'. Facebook and Twitter are not places to go to for objective news stories. I knew that from long ago and it's only gotten worse. Additionally, the AI algorithms on Facebook and Twitter learn what they can about you and present you with ads and information about groups and sites that may be of interest (to you specifically). They tailor the ads to your gender, age, and interests. It's boring. 

I recently stumbled upon a handy new website called Early Bird Books. It is described as follows "Early Bird Books is a popular online platform that caters to book lovers and avid readers. With its user-friendly interface and extensive collection of literary works, Early Bird Books has become a go-to destination for those seeking literary inspiration and entertainment". What it does is provide a daily email list of discounted Kindle books available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Google, Apple Books, and Kobo. Since I do purchase a fair amount of Kindle books, I checked out their selections, and I've already used it to purchase three Kindle books. Two of them are by an author called Miss Read who wrote a series of wonderful books about a middle-aged unmarried school headmistress in a small English town during the 1950s. The series follows her life in the small town of Fairacre, a town populated with men and women of all walks of life. I remember my mother reading books by Miss Read when I was a pre-teenager; she loved them and now I know why. I've only read two of her books, but can recommend them highly--Village Diary and Farewell to Fairacre (a nearly perfect book in my estimation). They would not perhaps strike a chord in everyone, but they did in me. I loved 'visiting Fairacre' each evening to meet up with her and her friends, listening to the local gossip, and admiring her patience in dealing with all those villagers who wanted to marry her off to the local bachelor. I wish there were more books written in this style. They are escapist without being isolationist; Miss Read is a part of the world around her, albeit a small part of the world--a little village and a small school. Reading her books has also been a way for me to reconnect with my mother who died in 2001. She would be happy to know that I have enjoyed these books as she did. 

I am now reading and enjoying Stephen King's On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft. He published the book in 2000 after he was hit by a car in 1999 and nearly died. My cousin Cathy recommended it. I am learning about his approach to writing at the same time as I am learning about the man. An interesting combination. I've read some of his books (Salem's Lot, Cujo, and Doctor Sleep) and have otherwise seen the tv-series Salem's Lot and the films The Shining and The Shawshank Redemption (probably one of my all-time favorite films) based on his books. 

I need to get back to my own writing. I've been 'on a break' as they say, after having written quite prolifically before Christmas. I need to get into the swing of things again. 


Saturday, February 24, 2024

Wise words from Mary Oliver

Mary Oliver is one of my favorite poets. She was fully connected to the nature around her and was from a very young age. When I read her words, they pierce my mind and heart with their clarity and wisdom. We don't have time to waste in our lives, and yet so many of us do. We waste time on social media, we waste time watching one tv show after another. There is nothing inherently wrong with either social media or tv. It's when we devote hours of our day to them when we could be doing something else, something that might bring us closer to the people around us or to the spiritual or to the natural world. She writes about getting started on belonging to the world, but for her, that world was mostly the natural world. I am also so inclined. There is so much to discover in the natural world, and I've written a lot about that since I became the caretaker of an allotment garden in 2016. I know that one cannot live life as a hermit or hide oneself away, but we have to respect the individual choices that people make about how to live their lives. We cannot force introverts to be extroverts, or extroverts to be introverts. We cannot force those who love urban living to love rural living, and vice versa. And so on. We are where we are for a reason, and we can make the most of each day that is given us in that environment, no matter how difficult. We each have to find our own way of belonging to the world and use our god-given talents to join the world. That will be a different road for each person. The important thing is that one contributes to the world in his or her own unique way. 


Mary Oliver writes: 

I know, you never intended to be in this world.
But you’re in it all the same.
So why not get started immediately.
I mean, belonging to it.
There is so much to admire, to weep over.
And to write music or poems about.
Bless the feet that take you to and fro.
Bless the eyes and the listening ears.
Bless the tongue, the marvel of taste.
Bless touching.
You could live a hundred years, it’s happened.
Or not.
I am speaking from the fortunate platform
of many years,
none of which, I think, I ever wasted.
Do you need a prod?
Do you need a little darkness to get you going?
Let me be as urgent as a knife, then,
and remind you of Keats,
so single of purpose and thinking, for a while,
he had a lifetime. 

~Mary Oliver
(from her book: Blue Horses)

(She mentions John Keats (1795-1821), who was an English Romantic poet who died of tuberculosis when he was only twenty-five years old. A reminder that we don't always know if we have a lifetime or not to achieve our dreams and visions. As I am fond of saying--If not now, when? There is no time like the present to start doing. As the Nike ad says--Just do it). 

Wise words from Matt Haig

Apropos some of my previous posts; Matt Haig sums it up beautifully when he writes that 'happiness isn't very good for the economy'. I would go one step further and say that the media is invested in depressing us. Why? I would guess it has to do with ratings, because the more we watch, the more brainwashed we become, and then they can sell us whatever world view they wish to push on us. They have an agenda for sure. On social media, it has to do with clicks that are given to each article posted. All of the clickbait stories bring in revenue for the advertisers. Again, we’re back to money. How cynical the world has become.

Matt Haig writes:

"The world is increasingly designed to depress us. Happiness isn't very good for the economy. If we were happy with what we had, why would we need more?

How do you sell an anti-ageing moisturiser? You make someone worry about ageing. How do you get people to vote for a political party? You make them worry about immigration. How do you get them to buy insurance? By making them worry about everything. How do you get them to have plastic surgery? By highlighting their physical flaws. How do you get them to watch a TV show? By making them worry about missing out. How do you get them to buy a new smartphone? By making them feel like they are being left behind.

To be calm becomes a kind of revolutionary act. To be happy with your own non-upgraded existence. To be comfortable with our messy, human selves, would not be good for business".

(from his book: Reasons to Stay Alive) 

Monday, February 19, 2024

Restoring equilibrium and peace by not watching the news

It is easier than you think to kill the joy and spirit in others and in the society around us. For starters, just count up the number of feel-good articles that make it onto the news versus the number of articles detailing wars, rapes, murders, mass shootings, aggressive behaviors of all kinds (especially in politics), all sorts of upcoming diseases and epidemics, and all of the other assorted miseries that define our 'civilized' society. If you spent most of your free time reading or watching the news, you'd slowly go crazy. You'd at least sink into depression. And yet that's what many people do--allow the drivel that passes for news--to invade and permeate their daily lives. There is no peace to be found in living that way. A continuous presentation of bad behavior will alter your world view for sure. If it doesn't make you cynical, it will make you fearful. There are a lot of people who live in fear.  

I'm not saying we should shut out news shows completely, we cannot, but I am in favor of shutting out a large portion of them in order to be able to live peacefully and peaceably with others. Society is done no favors if its members are continually distrustful, fearful, and ultimately cynical about said society's capability to take care of them should real trouble arise. I think we have reached that tipping point. I don't see how falling into an abyss of despair and nihilism helps anyone. Yet that's what we're being tipped into en masse

The losses of joy and the spark that keeps us alive and moving forward are not trivial or banal things. What is the motive of the companies who present (their version of) the news? Do they want to inform or do they want to destroy the basic goodness in people? I have to ask that question. I'm not likely to get an answer, but I am aware that I am being played. And it's not a good feeling. I spent one happy day yesterday 'offline', as in, I didn't go near my computer nor did I watch any news programs. Doing that for one day restored my equilibrium. I'm going to do it more often. 

Saturday, February 10, 2024

Two good pieces of advice

"I’m not telling you to make the world better, because I don’t think that progress is necessarily part of the package. I’m just telling you to live in it. Not just to endure it, not just to suffer it, not just to pass through it, but to live in it. To look at it. To try to get the picture. To live recklessly. To take chances. To make your own work and take pride in it. To seize the moment. And if you ask me why you should bother to do that, I could tell you that the grave’s a fine and private place, but none I think do there embrace. Nor do they sing there, or write, or argue, or see the tidal bore on the Amazon, or touch their children. And that’s what there is to do and get it while you can and good luck at it.”

Joan Didion

 

“Find meaning. Distinguish melancholy from sadness. Go out for a walk. It doesn’t have to be a romantic walk in the park, spring at its most spectacular moment, flowers and smells and outstanding poetical imagery smoothly transferring you into another world. It doesn’t have to be a walk during which you’ll have multiple life epiphanies and discover meanings no other brain ever managed to encounter. Do not be afraid of spending quality time by yourself. Find meaning or don’t find meaning but 'steal' some time and give it freely and exclusively to your own self. Opt for privacy and solitude. That doesn’t make you antisocial or cause you to reject the rest of the world. But you need to breathe. And you need to be.”

Albert Camus


Tuesday, January 23, 2024

Greed will be the death of us

Boeing has had its share of problems recently. This quote is from The New York Times article published today: Opinion | Boeing’s Problems Started Long Before the Alaska Airlines Mishap - The New York Times (nytimes.com)

"What Boeing has missed, as it tried to dump costs and speed production, was the chance to ensure that safety was a cultural core and a competitive advantage. Corporations can choose to push back against the Wall Street-driven notion that safety equals cost and thus lower profits".

This type of thinking--cutting costs and speeding up production--has invaded every corner of the business world. It's a disease without a cure. Every time I turn around, I read or hear about more budget cuts that result in fewer employees and more work for those employees who remain. When the emphasis is on keeping costs low, something gets compromised, and that is usually quality work and eventually safety. Even employees who want to do their absolute best (and more) will not be able to get it all done in the best possible way. Corners will be cut in the name of saving money and time. After all, time is money. Those employees with good ethics and a conscience know that this type of thinking won't work in the long run, and they leave. Highly-competent employees who don't want to compromise quality and safety leave to take other jobs that won't force them to compromise their ethics. But what happens when the majority of companies behave in this way? What happens when companies that prioritize ethics and quality work become a minority?

As always, Wall Street figures into the picture. What would happen if companies delisted from the stock market and focused on the business they were created to do, rather than on corporate profits and having to satisfy shareholders (investors)? Would they lose all of their investors? I understand that companies need investors who will provide the money needed for the company to grow. And of course investors want their money back via profits. I don't understand enough about how the stock market works to really discuss this in detail. My only question is: when is enough, enough? If and when investors are paid back, do they need more money? The Norwegians have a saying: 'mye vil ha mer'. It means the wealthy will always want more. I guess that's part of the investment deal. As long as companies have to consider their shareholders first, employees and quality work will take second place. Budget cuts, fewer employees hired, outsourcing to cut costs, loss of competent employees and eventually substandard finished products are the result. 

Greed will be the death of us. 

Friday, January 12, 2024

The waning of common sense

Actions speak louder than empty words, strange ideas, or half-baked theories. When you put any of the latter into action and the results are underwhelming or even foolish, you have to ask why. The answer is found in the waning of common sense. Society is losing its ability to think, discuss, and act rationally. 

People are talking about how AI (artificial intelligence) is going to be the undoing of the human race--that AI technology/machines are going to wipe us out. As far as I can see, the human race is doing a bang-up job of wiping itself out all by its lonesome. AI doesn't worry me half as much as does the bad behavior of human beings. Let's list up the bad behavior: greed and more greed, lust, envy, stealing, cheating, murder, lack of peace, warmongering--all of which will be our undoing.  

Climate change hysteria has invaded and permeated every aspect of our lives. While I don't deny that there have been increases in different types of climate changes (global warming, rising seas, melting polar caps), no one can say for sure if the causes are due to man or to natural changes or both. I would guess both. We should make adjustments to the way we live, yes. That we should uncritically swallow every new idea that is put forth as to how to eliminate climate change, no. 

Pertinent to the previous point, here in Norway, electric cars are overtaking gas cars, which will likely be phased out in a few years. The politicians are totally on board with this way of thinking. There is little to no discussion of why electric cars are better than gas cars. I understand that the carbon dioxide emissions from gas cars can contribute to a greenhouse effect. But what about the production of the huge lithium-ion batteries needed to run these cars? What about the mining that is necessary to obtain the metals needed for these batteries? What about the disposal of these huge batteries? And additionally, let's get real, Norway is a winter country with snow and bitter cold from November until April. Cold temperatures reduce the efficiency of these batteries which in turn affects the performance of electric cars. Heating electric cars is a drain on the batteries, so in the wintertime the cars can be quite cold so as not to drain the batteries. Also, I've read that the production of lithium-ion batteries results in more carbon dioxide emissions compared to gas car usage. So tell me again, why are electric cars better? Why not push hybrid cars that can run on gas fuel in the winter and on battery power in the summer, if you've got to push anything at all? The goal is null emissions from gas-fueled cars, but it's ok if the emissions come from electric car battery production. This makes no sense to me since the emissions from the latter are only going to increase as more and more transportation vehicles (cars, boats, planes) 'go electric'. 

I am on board with using public transportation more, rather than using our cars for everything. Better yet, get out and walk if you can. Interestingly enough, Oslo has invested millions of dollars in electric buses and is phasing out its biofuel/diesel buses. But do the electric buses run in the wintertime when it is bitter cold outside, like it has been the past few weeks? No, they don't. They've stopped running, they're cold inside because to warm the buses up drains the batteries, the distance range (how long you can drive before the battery needs recharging) is abysmal, and the bus drivers are fed up. Do the bus company managers listen to their drivers? No, they don't. They continue to push their agenda, that electric buses are the future, no matter what. The same problem has occurred with the electric ferries that run between the Oslo fjord islands. Who wants to be out in the middle of the ocean when the ferries stop due to battery problems? These problems don't inspire confidence at all. I don't even want to think about the airline companies; eventually they'll be pushing electric airplanes. I won't be flying on them. 

Oslo has invested millions of dollars in bike lanes. Admirable, yes. You can really get around the city using your bicycle. We can thank the Green Party for that. But again, this has been their focus to the exclusion of other equally important issues. And during the wintertime, the bike lanes are cleared of snow and salted. The sidewalks are another story. Walking is just as healthy for you as biking, perhaps more so. But no one is going to get out and walk when they fear falling and breaking an arm or leg on slippery snowy sidewalks. It makes no sense to me, this strange prioritizing. Additionally, very few people except the diehards bike during the wintertime. 

Food prices continue to increase. The increases seen are for the healthy foods--fruits and vegetables, fish, etc. I can attest to that. But a box of gingerbread cookies after Christmas in one of the Oslo supermarkets was selling for less than a dollar. Go figure. The Green Party is pushing us all to eat less or no meat. But I don't see them pushing the supermarket owners to lower the prices of healthy foods. I don't see them making that their focal point. The thinking is that we should continue to pay higher prices for them. Is it any wonder that people eat at fast food places where they can still afford the prices? The thinking that 'I should pay more for the quality food that is best for me' only goes so far. Most people have a food budget. I feel sorry for families of four or more. Their food budgets must be very high. And while I'm on the subject of food, salmon has been pushed and is still being pushed as being very healthy for us. Wild salmon, yes. Farmed salmon, not so much. The open tanks for fish farming use antibiotics and pesticides to keep the salmon 'healthy'. Sick fish find their way into the processing plants. What is healthy about keeping fish swimming around in crowded conditions in tanks compared to having them swimming wild in the ocean? The answer given is that it isn't possible to catch enough wild salmon for human consumption, thus we need fish farms. My answer--eat less salmon, eat less tuna, eat less meat. You don't have to cut them out completely from your diet. Just cut down. We're overfishing the oceans as it is. 

Norway is very good at recycling plastic bottles and plastic items in general. However, plastic waste is exported to other European countries that presumably have ways of dealing with this type of waste. I'm not sure of the percentage of plastic waste that is exported, but it seems to me that in a country as rich as this one, that a solution could be found so that Norway could take care of its own plastic waste, rather than export it. Apparently, many countries have previously exported their plastic waste to developing countries which have found themselves overwhelmed by the sheer amounts. So these countries have dumped the waste they cannot process into the waterways and oceans. So what has been accomplished? It is not correct to say that Norway (or the USA or other European countries) are not polluting the oceans. They are, just not directly. Each country should take care of its own waste. Rich countries should lead the way, and the Green Party in this country should prioritize that. 

Sunday, January 7, 2024

Oh Christmas tree

At Christmastime, we usually buy 'edelgran' (noble fir in English) trees, and this year, the tree is an exceptionally healthy one. It's still drinking about a liter of water each day. So we'll keep the tree up until it stops drinking water. I can't picture Christmas without a tree; I know some younger people who don't put up a tree, mostly because they travel home to family during the holidays and there's no one to give the tree water. But if that were the case for me, I'd put up an artificial tree instead. When I was single and living on my own in New Jersey, I did just that. Like my mother, I love pretty much everything about the Christmas season.

For as long as we've lived in our apartment, the Christmas tree always has been a holiday fixture in the dining room area, which also has a sitting area with a comfy couch. When it gets dark out and the tree's lights are on, I like to stretch out on the couch and just look at the tree. It's peaceful, calming, and meditative. Sometimes I turn on the flameless candle on the table near the couch, and the combination of both is very soothing. Puts me right to sleep. One of the nicest things I know of is waking up after a short nap to see the tree standing there, with its lights and decorations. A constant in a world of inconstants. A reminder that all is right with the world if we choose to look at it that way. Of course, I'm not naive, I know the world is drowning in problems. But I can't focus just on them. Before Christmas, I was rather despondent due to the lack of peace and all of the problems in the world. But when I traveled to Dresden and met my friend there, I got back some of my Christmas spirit. When I get a bit depressed or sad, I try to remember what it was like when I was younger and going through troubled times. I had faith that life would change, and it did. I hold out the same hope for the world, because I don't know how much worse it can get. 
















Many people before me have had the same thoughts about their Christmas trees. I'm including the lyrics to Oh Christmas Tree, a traditional carol (written by German organist and composer Ernst Anschütz who called the song Oh Tannenbaum which means Oh Fir Tree) that we sang as children. You can read more about it on Wikipedia. I still love hearing the song now. 

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
How lovely are your branches!
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
How lovely are your branches!
Not only green in summer’s heat,
But also winter’s snow and sleet.
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
How lovely are your branches!

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Of all the trees most lovely;
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Of all the trees most lovely.
Each year you bring to us delight
With brightly shining Christmas light!
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Of all the trees most lovely.

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
We learn from all your beauty;
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
We learn from all your beauty.
Your bright green leaves with festive cheer,
Give hope and strength throughout the year.
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
We learn from all your beauty.

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Reflections on academic plagiarism

I’m not stepping into the politically-charged fracas surrounding the resignation of the president of Harvard University--Claudine Gay. I understand that politics will inevitably rear its ugly head in the USA nowadays no matter what the situation. I’m only interested in one aspect of the case--the alleged plagiarism charges against her. If it’s true that she plagiarized some parts of her doctoral thesis already way back in 1997, then that’s the only thing that interests me. That’s because I spent over forty years in an academic research career and wrote nearly one hundred scientific articles, all of which were peer-reviewed and checked by specific software for plagiarism from around 2005 or so. This type of software appeared around the year 2000 and most scientific journals had incorporated it into use by 2005. If you were intentionally unethical and extensively plagiarized others’ articles, you would eventually get caught and your article would be refused. The ‘punishment’ was not more severe than that, except that ultimately, if you don’t publish in academia, you perish, hence the old adage—‘publish or perish’. The punishment of no published articles leads to no funding, because scientists will not get funding for their research if they haven’t published. Essentially it’s tantamount to shooting yourself in the foot. But in my long experience, most of the scientists I ran across or collaborated with were decent and ethical people. I include myself in that group. I can’t tell you how many times I lay awake during the night, wondering about the phrasing of this or that sentence or paragraph, wanting to get it just right, and hoping that I had without parroting others’ ideas. The problem of course is that each published article builds on the work that came before; in other words, there are very few novel ideas. The novel ideas belong to the few visionaries who move science along in a way that the rest of us do not.

If you have to write about the ideas and findings of others, as we had to do as scientists, then you must reference their previously-published articles. You cannot knowingly take credit for ideas and findings that rightfully belong to others. Most scientists are ethical and follow this unwritten rule; no one would like to end up being labeled a plagiarist. Of course mistakes are made and usually those cases are sorted out by the author and the journal, or by the author and his or her co-authors. But if you knowingly plagiarize and are caught doing so, the consequences can be unpleasant for your career.

I was an anonymous article reviewer for a number of journals for well over twenty years. Article reviewing is voluntary; we scientists do not get paid for helping the journals in this way. I have come across blatant plagiarism (of words or ideas) only several times in that period of time. In one case, the authors copied and pasted whole abstracts and paragraphs in the Introduction from one of their previously-published articles to a manuscript they were writing and wished to submit for review. They did this in order to pass off their new article as original. We’re talking about the exact same abstract and introductory paragraph(s) showing up in two different papers, with only a drug concentration or amount changed to indicate that the new article was different from the previous one. They did not bother to cite their previous article (had they done so, it would have been less problematic). In other words, the authors plagiarized themselves (self-plagiarism), which you might think is not plagiarism, except that it is. This type of behavior has positive consequences for the authors if their behavior is not discovered. We academics know why this is done—to increase the number of publications on one’s publication list. In this case, the authors had tested the effects of five different chemicals on cancer cells, and published the effects of each one individually (five separate papers instead of one paper detailing the effects of all five chemicals). Since the methodology involved in each paper was the same, as were the aims of the studies, the authors were too lazy to write new abstracts and introductions for each article. It happens more often than you might think and is not discovered so often, mostly because many reviewers won’t google previous publications by the authors in question due to lack of time or interest (another kind of laziness). How did I find out that the authors had done this? Interested as I was in the subject matter, I googled some of their previous articles. After I saw what the authors had done, I recommended to the editor that the manuscript be refused and the authors chastised for this practice. What I know for sure is that the article was published as it was (without any changes) in another journal (low impact-factor), because those journals are desperate for articles to publish. They need them for their existence.

Another case involved a high-profile group who published a rather banal article in the late 1990s in one of the best journals in the science field. Their article documented the use of a technology that could be used to assess DNA content in cancer cells. It was presented as though this was a novel finding, which it most certainly was not. I happen to personally know the researchers who invented this technique and published many articles about it twenty years before the publication in the elite journal; nowhere in that article were the original researchers referenced. I and many others wrote letters to the editor pointing this out, expecting the journal to retract the article or at least write a short commentary about the situation. Nothing happened. The journal did not want to upset the research group involved, so nothing happened. No consequences. When you’re the elite, when you sit at the top, you can get away with a lot. I learned that already in my late thirties/early forties, with nearly thirty years to go in the academic research arena.

So back to Claudine Gay, who as president of Harvard was making close to a million dollars a year. I’ve read some of the articles about what she did; the most descriptive one so far (in terms of comparisons of Gay’s writing versus the original articles she is accused of plagiarizing) was written by Sophia Nguyen and published in The Washington Post: Timeline: Plagiarism allegations against Claudine Gay - The Washington Post . It is possible to read the article for free if you register your email address with them. After reading the article, I say, Gay should have known better. Harvard University should have known better and reacted differently and much earlier. But many elite universities would probably have done the same--swept the affair under the rug as a tempest in a teapot. But they’re wrong, it is an important matter, because the entire affair allows for a way of thinking that is already prevalent in our society. That laziness is ok, mediocrity is good enough, taking credit for others’ work is ok as long as you don’t get caught, but if you get caught, talk your way out of it. One must strive for ethical behavior at all levels of academia. It’s hard work (the antithesis of laziness) and sometimes you’re fighting against the crowd, but in the end, you have to live with yourself and answer to yourself.

Sunday, December 24, 2023

The politics of revenge (aka politics practiced by idiots)

This will be a short post, because I don't want to focus on negativity during the Christmas season. But it's also important to point out that we need a seismic shift in American politics away from revenge (tit for tat) politics and idiocy, toward balanced politics based on common sense, decency and intelligence. I wonder if that will ever happen, but God knows I'm hoping. Perhaps Santa will bear the latter down the chimneys of all of the politicians currently serving (I'm including a number of European politicians as well). 

How did we get here? I've asked that question many times. The great divide. The great disconnect. Why is it impossible for American politicians to meet somewhere in the middle without having apoplectic reactions on both sides? He said this, she said that, so I have to take revenge. Hasn't the American public gotten tired of being screamed at, lectured to, derided, insulted and otherwise treated badly by its politicians? Or do they just no longer care? Just asking. Because the current situation is likely to usher in someone who will take charge in a way that will no longer seem democratic. That person will crush all those who oppose him (or her). Think it can't happen? Think again. We are moving toward autocracy. I say wake up before it is too late.  

Summing up 2023, political cartoon-style















Sometimes the political cartoons sum up just about everything you've been thinking (or worrying) about.....


Thursday, November 30, 2023

The small trials of winter

It's been a while since my last post, and that's mostly due to illness in our household. Even though we've taken the vaccines against Covid and this year's influenza, that doesn't stop regular colds, sinusitis, bronchitis or any of the other winter illnesses from rearing their irritating heads. I so prefer the other seasons, mostly because we don't have to deal with all of these illnesses. Well, sometimes an occasional summer cold. I find it hard to believe that we made it through a pandemic back in 2020 and 2021. We managed to avoid Covid until June 2021, although I can't say that it was worse than some of the major colds we've had. We were apparently lucky. But it's interesting that we weren't sick during the winters of 2020 or 2021, most likely due to lockdowns and the like. I don't want to go back to that time, of course. But I would like to be illness-free. 

When I was younger, I was susceptible to getting bronchitis. I've had some wicked rounds with bronchitis--coughing so intensely that I cracked two small rib bones. I remember one year (1993) vividly; I lived on antibiotics from November until February. Coughing was extremely painful with broken ribs, not an experience I care to repeat. But the worst bout of illness I've ever had was in 2004, when I got a flu that knocked me out completely. It took me months to recover; the worst part of it was the fever and the chills, but also the total lack of energy. Flus are nasty illnesses and that experience pushed me to take the flu vaccine each subsequent year.

I have friends who are dealing with RSV, bronchitis, sinusitis (also very painful) and regular colds. All of us are getting older. My good friend who recently passed away was stricken by Covid; although her neurological illness would have eventually taken her, it was Covid that ended her life. I guess the immune system weakens as we age. I guess we just have to deal with it. 

When I was younger, I never understood why older people traveled to warmer climates during the wintertime. Now I know why. I don't know if one avoids all the respiratory illnesses that way, but one certainly avoids all the other pitfalls of winter--snow, ice, intense cold. Here is the city of Oslo, they've gotten better about cleaning the sidewalks and throwing down some gravel after a snowstorm, but that doesn't prevent the remaining snow from caking and becoming ice. The sidewalks can be slippery. I'd like to reclaim my joyous love of winter that I had as a child, but I do believe it's long gone. And since I became a garden enthusiast, I know how I want to spend most of my days. In the garden. I can't do that in winter. 

Thank God for the month of December--we have Christmas to look forward to and all the preparations leading up to it are enjoyable for the most part. So I focus on that, and not on the small irritations and trials of winter. But because this past summer was neither sunny nor warm, I didn't get my usual dose of sun and warmth that gets me through the winter. So in January I'm heading to Florida for a week together with my friend Jean, and I'm looking forward to that! 

Thursday, November 16, 2023

An interesting perspective on toxic people

"Not all toxic people are cruel and uncaring. Some of them love us dearly. Many of them have good intentions. Most are toxic to our being simply because their needs and way of existing in the world force us to compromise ourselves and our happiness. They aren’t inherently bad people, but they aren’t the right people for us. And as hard as it is, we have to let them go. Life is hard enough without being around people who bring you down, and as much as you care, you can’t destroy yourself for the sake of someone else. You have to make your wellbeing a priority. Whether that means breaking up with someone you care about, loving a family member from a distance, letting go of a friend, or removing yourself from a situation that feels painful — you have every right to leave and create a safer space for yourself."

--Daniell Koepke (from the book Daring to Take Up Space)

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We've all found ourselves in situations created by toxic people. Many of us have lived in toxic situations for years before doing something about them. I know that includes me. Earlier in my life, I struggled with how I should deal with toxic people, people whose sole priority was themselves, no matter what. Letting go of them or of the behaviors that fed them, was very difficult but absolutely necessary. Every time I feel that I'm in the presence of what I call an emotional vampire, every time the alarm bells go off inside my head and heart so loudly that I cannot ignore them, I know it's time to establish boundaries and to prioritize my own wellbeing. Sometimes it takes many years to realize this. I am always happy when I meet someone who has figured this out in a much shorter amount of time than it took me. Being a nice person does not mean being a doormat for others, either in one's personal life or in one's work life. I cannot emphasize this enough. So I don't know if I agree with Koepke when she says that some toxic people love us dearly. If you don't understand yourself well enough to know that are behaving in ways that hurt others continually, then you don't really love others. In any case, I would say--distance yourself from toxic people or don't stay in personal or work situations that wear you down, destroy your self-esteem, or hurt you. Distance yourself from or don't stay with people who gaslight you, blame you for things that are not your fault, or tell you that you're not being your usual nice self. Turn on your heel and go. 

Sunday, November 12, 2023

Books that influenced and changed my ways of thinking

I've been thinking about some of the books I've read that have had a profound and permanent influence on me, in the sense that they changed my way of thinking and looking at things. Perhaps I was psychologically ready for those changes at the time I read them. Nevertheless, these books provided a spur that was necessary at the time. Some of the changes set me on brighter, happier paths, while others ushered in an acknowledgment that the world could be a melancholy and evil place. Some helped me deal with issues that I was going through at the time I read them. There are twenty books on my list; I will write about five each over the next four posts. 

A Candle in Her Room by Ruth M. Arthur. A book from my pre-teen years that is impossible to forget. Written in 1966, it is the story of four generations of women who come into contact with an evil doll that has the capability of altering personalities and behavior. The evil behavior encompasses deceit, betrayal, manipulation, and lust for power. Looking back, I don't think this is a book for children, more for teenagers. But when I remember back to my pre-teen years, I think the book was an eye-opener. It was an introduction to the existence of evil in the world and it showed me that even those my age could have questionable motives and evil intentions. 

The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury. A sci-fi novel, one of the first I ever read, that chronicles mankind's exploration and colonization of Mars. The sense of foreboding in some of the chapters, especially when humans first settle on Mars and meet the Martians, who seem at first to be welcoming, is palpable. One of the scenes I will always remember--the Martians had lured the humans into a false sense of security by being hospitable and recreating scenes of earthly life, but their actual plans for the humans were nefarious. An unsettling book that describes deceit and evil behavior, and a sense of foreboding--as in, what bad thing will happen now? 
 
A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. I've read the book and seen several movie versions of it. It is impossible not to be affected by the redemption of Ebenezer Scrooge from a heartless miser to a warm-hearted and generous old man after being visited by the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future, respectively. It is a classic in the truest sense of the word, a book that leaves one with the knowledge that forgiveness and personal redemption are possible and that there is always hope that good will prevail. 

Jude the Obscure by Thomas Hardy. The ending of this novel was like a punch in the stomach. I remember telling my father that Jude's life was the definition of injustice. How much despair and tragedy could one life contain? In Hardy's view, there were apparently no limits to the misery one life could contain. My friend Brendan read the book and wrote to me 'obscure, indeed'. Hardy uses the word 'obscure' to describe Jude; Jude was an unknown and relatively unimportant player in the society around him, to the women in his life, and to the universe at large. Unable to be with the woman he loved (Sue) and trapped into marriage by a woman who pretended to be pregnant and who did not love him (Arabella), Jude's fate was sealed. Arabella had no scruples (commits bigamy), Sue had too many (felt guilty for all her choices for happiness). Although Jude and Sue had some years of happiness living together, they paid for that happiness in tragic ways. Hardy's book is a rather despairing commentary on love, the institution of marriage, societal norms, and church laws, all of which could be and were twisted in this novel to bring about oppressive unhappiness. It's almost as though if you tried to choose happiness, you were doomed to fail, doomed to regret, doomed to feeling guilty about wanting to be happy in love and life. The novel also questions whether personal happiness and personal choice were really possible and whether personal fate is determined or undetermined. The novel's viewpoints challenged my ideas at the time about love, marriage and happy ever after. 

The Road Less Traveled by M.Scott Peck. The discovery of this book was life-changing for me. I've recommended it to so many people over the years. The wisdom contained within its pages is priceless. Peck was a psychiatrist and had seen and listened to a lot of patients; he subsequently wrote another book called People of the Lie, which fascinated and scared me since it dealt with people who live in the dark and shy away from the light--evil people, psychopaths, narcissists--the list is long. The Road Less Traveled is more for ordinary folk dealing with the problems and difficulties of life. As Peck clearly states 'Life is difficult'. I read it at a time of great upheaval in my own life, and it really did help to set me on a better path, because I realized that I could change, that change was possible if I took responsibility for my own life. It sounds cliched, but it's not. Peck's view is that real spiritual and intellectual growth take time, but you have to desire them. You have to choose to desire them and do the hard work required in order to achieve them. 

Saturday, November 11, 2023

Sweet moments in time

Tonight on my way home from church, I thought of Paul, the older blind man I met in September on the train to Grand Central Station. He got on the train at Scarsdale if I remember correctly; his seeing-eye dog, a sweet black labrador, led the way onto the train from the platform and immediately started sniffing/looking about for a free seat. I was minding my own business when suddenly I felt a nudge under my right armpit (I was sitting in an aisle seat). It was a dog, but not just any dog. I was about to give up my seat when I saw that the seat opposite me was free, and the seeing-eye dog discovered that too. So they took that seat. When the conductor came around asking for tickets, Paul showed him his wallet, which must have contained some sort of monthly pass. The dog was at his feet, not blocking the aisle. It was apparent that they trusted each other and that they had traveled on the train before since the dog knew what to do.  

I didn't find out the man's name until we exited the train. I waited until most of our compartment had emptied out, and then I followed Paul and his dog off the train. I knew that he was going to wait for an MTA train rep to come and guide him to his connecting train because I heard him telling the conductor that he needed that kind of assistance. The conductor said he would arrange it. But I had already decided that I was going to wait with him until the rep showed up, if he wanted me to, because I wasn't sure how long it would take for the rep to arrive. Once we had exited the train, I spoke to Paul and told him that I would wait with him until the rep showed up if he wanted me to, and he said yes and thanked me. He asked me my name and I told him, and he told me his name was Paul. At this point the dog was sniffing and licking my fingers, so it was apparent that he trusted me. Paul commented on the similarity of our names--Paul and Paula--and that it was unusual. It was for sure. It was almost as though our meeting was meant to happen. 

I have a soft spot in my heart for the blind, I always have. I remember my mother telling us children that her mother went blind in her old age, probably from glaucoma, since there was no treatment for it back in the 1940s (her mother died in the early 1950s). My mother lived with her mother and took care of her until her death. She told us that they would walk to church together, my mother guiding her along the sidewalk. Sometimes the events that occurred were humorous, other times not. My mother seemed to take it all in stride, as did her mother. I know people now who are losing their vision, or who had neurological diseases that robbed them of their sight. Macular degeneration, glaucoma, retinitis pigmentosa. It must be difficult to have spent most of your life seeing, and then suddenly lose your vision when you get old. Luckily our society has organizations that help the blind. I support those organizations, one of which is the Norwegian Association Of The Blind (Norges Blindeforbund). They recently built a new school for the training of seeing-eye dogs. 

I'm glad I met Paul and his dog. It made my day. A sweet moment in time that touched my heart for always. 

 

Trying to understand the mystery of life

Apropos my last post, where I talked about accepting some things in this life (like my faith) that I know I will never understand on this ea...