Sometimes the things we want are defined by the things we do
not want. That’s true for me to some extent, but as I get older, I know pretty
much exactly what I want:
a) Peace and quiet = without these, I cannot relax. I do not
want to be around people the entire day, and that includes my work day. I want
to be able to close my office door and to be by myself. I need peace and quiet
at work and at home, in other words, some hours to myself where I am beholden
to no one. I want alone time that is responsibility-free and guilt-free, and
that is not invaded by pointless conversations or people wanting me to feel
guilty for not paying attention to them.
b) Real communication = without it, nothing works. If I
cannot have real honest communication, then I’d rather not waste my time and
other people’s time talking. I don’t want to fake conversations or interest in
things I have no interest in, nor do I want to compete with others for
listening time. If I am in conversation with you and all you want to do is to
talk about yourself and how lousy your life is or how important your life is compared
to others, then I don’t want to be your conversation partner. In other words,
don’t waste my valuable precious time complaining to me about how miserable
your life is or how important you are, because you have no idea what others
might be dealing with on a daily basis. And they don’t burden the world with
their problems or their inflated ego.
c) Simplicity = without it, life becomes a meaningless
drudgery. The trend these days is to complicate everything. Workplaces are
exercises in frustration and lack of effectiveness because administrative routines
and rules have become too complicated. We worship on the altar of triviality. At
home, the same can be true. I’d rather cook simple hearty meals from scratch,
with fresh vegetables and foodstuffs, than load us up with excess salt and
sugar from processed foods, pre-packaged foods, or foods that have been suffocated
in plastic to ‘protect’ them (plastic wrapped so tightly around vegetables that
it cannot be healthy for them). Why can’t vegetables and fruit be free and
uncovered? Why must we waste time, money and energy on packing each individual vegetable
into its own plastic housing? Why can’t we keep it simple? Grow some of our own
vegetables, or support local farmers who do. Buy unpackaged vegetables or those
that will be tossed away because they don’t ‘look’ appealing. Cut down on the
amount of food purchased. You don’t need pantries stocked full of food, unless
you believe the apocalypse is coming.
d) Farewell to competition and to expectations = I’ve
reached that point. I no longer want to compete. I don’t see the point of
competition anymore. I no longer want expectations of greatness placed upon my
shoulders by others who mean that I should aim high and have grandiose
ambitions. Those days are gone; they belong to a past time when I was much younger.
I’ve seen the light and accepted it, why can’t my leaders at work also see it?
My super-productive days are over. I want an ordinary life, with ordinary cares
and small worries each day. I want to putter, to garden, to hang out at home,
to pursue my hobbies, to not have to measure up to specific metrics imposed on
me at work, and to not have to worry about how I look or what I wear. If I want
to walk around in jogging pants and sneakers, so be it. I want to walk in the
sunshine, to be free to do so, to not have time constraints on me, to not have
to have homework anymore in the form of articles to write or articles to read
or review. I want to be free of grant applications and progress reports. I want
peace, quiet, real communication, simplicity, and an unencumbered life.
