Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Jumping hurdles
It’s been a
while since I last wrote for my blog; I have been very busy with work-related
things. My work life has changed yet again, perhaps for the better. Time will
tell. I am now part of a large research group that has a new leader and he
seems to be up for the job. He has the qualities needed to run a research
group, and for now, that’s all I care about. My workplace remains a study in
transition; I doubt the dust will settle any time soon. Several of my friends
and colleagues are now dealing with the depression and uncertainty that haunted my life up until the end of 2011. It’s their turn now. I let go, gave
in, and resigned myself to constant change, change for change’s sake, to
frustration, to disappointment, to bad behavior. In the end, you get used to
change and all its accoutrements. What seemed like such an impossible hurdle to
overcome, dealing with constant change, has at least become a hurdle of lower
height. It is possible to jump it at times without falling. It is even possible
sometimes to soar over it; that’s happened at least a few times since the new
year started. The associated hurdles of questionable leadership and boredom are
harder to soar over, but I will. I no longer look at work in the same way
anymore though; it’s a job, albeit well-paying and interesting, but a job
nonetheless, and when it’s time to go home, I close the door on it—a big change
for me. I doubt I will go in reverse and become the workaholic I once was. It’s
hard to let go of an identity that was comfortable, one that defined me for
many years. It’s finding a new identity that’s the tough challenge now; I
alternate between scientist and writer/photographer. Both make equal claims on
my time now. And I let them. Because in truth, I want to let them. I want both of
them in my life. I no longer choose one at the expense of the other. I don’t
want to give up my creative interests, and if I give up the time needed to
pursue them, I will be unhappy, that I know.
The four important F's
My friend Cindy, who is a retired minister, sends me different spiritual and inspirational reflections as she comes across them and thinks I...