More plays of light and reflections

Inspired by my previous post, and acknowledging that we are now in the season of light, I looked back over some of the photos I have taken during the past few years, where the plays of light caught my photographer's eye. I love looking at the different patterns created by sunlight reflecting off different objects, or created with other sources of light. 

A play of light

I took this photo this morning. Sunlight was streaming through our living room window and was caught by the candle holder on the coffee table. I love the play of light, the pattern......

The garden in March this year and last year

Such a contrast--my garden is still covered in snow this year (see first photo), whereas last year at this time it was snow-free and the snowdrops had bloomed (see remaining photos). It was probably still chilly, as it is now, but at least I could get started with raking and cleaning. I have no idea how long it will take until all the snow has melted in the garden now, but at the rate we're going, it could be mid- to late-April before all the snow is gone.

I cannot remember another year in my life when I wanted winter to be over as badly as I want it to be over this year. We have had so much snow, and frankly speaking, since I am not a skier, I don't care about a lot of snow. In an urban setting, snow is pretty for the first day when it silences the city, but after that, it's just messy, with dirty snow piles everywhere. Plus the fact that the sidewalks this year were permanently covered in ice, since no one bothered to clear them continually of the snow that fell. The key word is continually; this city just lets the snow build up in layers on the sidewalks, and think by throwing down some gravel, that this will take care of the problem. It doesn't.

In any case, spring has officially arrived, and the sun is getting stronger. My chili pepper plant on the kitchen window sill has already begun to produce small peppers, five of them to be exact, with more to come. So nature knows what to do and when to do it. Thank God for that. The cycle of life continues, and it is restorative for my soul.

Movie recommendation: Minuscule: Valley of the Lost Ants

I watched this film tonight and was absolutely captivated by it. The animation is wonderful, the story likewise. I haven't enjoyed an animated film this much since I first saw Fantasia. There is something about the feel of the movie--it's thoroughly original, sweet, and engaging. This is a film for all age groups, because the message is timeless. You'll be rooting for the head black ant and the ladybug. Here is the official trailer; check it out. And if you get a chance to see the entire movie, do so.

Some good quotes from Phyllis Theroux

I think this is what hooks one to gardening: it is the closest one can come to being present at creation.

Mistakes are the usual bridge between inexperience and wisdom.

An enlightened person raises the level of the consciousness of the entire community.

Children are born with imaginations in mint condition, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Then life corrects for grandiosity.

Falling silent should be cultivated, the way the woods fall silent in the snow. Messages you can’t send any other way can be heard.

Every house has its own private cup of sorrow. 

Writing is a deeply spiritual act that can have a profound effect upon the practitioner.

Writing is not only a reflection of what one thinks and feels but a rope one weaves with words that can lower you below or hoist you above the surface of your life, enabling you to go deeper or higher than you would otherwise go. What excites me about his metaphor is that is makes writing much more than a lifesaving venture.

There were times, in the beginning, when I used my journal as a wailing wall, but I learned not to immortalize the darkness. Rereading it was counterproductive. What I needed was a place in which to collect the light.

Everything we are given or learn or possess in any real sense - - the ability to play Beethoven sonata, write books, understand the principles of physics – is intended for one thing: to draw us closer to our selves.

To send a letter is a good way to go somewhere without moving anything but your heart.

Some recommendations: a book--The Journal Keeper: A Memoir; a TV series--The Sinner; and a film--Thelma

Winter is a season that keeps me indoors a lot of the time. I miss my garden and being outdoors, so it ends up being a good opportunity to catch up on my reading, movie watching, and TV watching. The latter two have tended to merge into each other since the movie theaters here have reduced their offerings considerably. Going to the movies is not what it once was, sadly. I keep hoping that movie theaters will not disappear altogether, but you never know given the ease of streaming films on nearly any device you wish to use.

I am reading Phyllis Theroux’s The Journal Keeper: A Memoir at present; I am only a fourth of the way through it, but can wholeheartedly recommend it. This memoir is a collection of her reflections on: her life as a writer, writing, the joys and difficulties of being a writer, finances, life, love, friendship, and her mistakes, strengths, dreams and desires. They are all things to which I can relate. She lived with (and took care of) her nearly-blind mother until she passed away, so she understands the passage of time and the importance of living now and doing what it is we must do. She understands the idea of trying to be the best version of herself. She is honest, unflinching and clear about her progress, successes and failures, about her relationships with her mother, children, neighbors and friends. It is rare that I come across a voice that resonates with me, or better-put, resonates with that part of me that is facing many of the same challenges. I look forward to picking up her book again in the evening before I sleep; I look forward to hearing what she has to say. She could be a friend; she is at the very least someone I would truly enjoy getting to know.

I have also discovered The Sinner, a 2017 TV series starring Jessica Biel. She plays a young married woman with a child, and her life seems to be ordinary and reasonably happy. She and her husband seem to have a good relationship. They both work together at the same company run by her husband’s father. And then one day when she and her family are relaxing on the beach at a nearby lake, she suddenly and inexplicably stands up, knife in hand, and proceeds to stab to death the young man sitting at a distance in front of her. And then the story really begins, because we know she has murdered him. The question is why. And that why is a journey into her psyche, her family life before she married, her relationship with her terminally-ill sister, and her relationship with her parents (especially an over-religious mother). The policeman assigned to her case tries to dig into her past in an effort to find answers as to why she would murder someone for apparently no reason. We know of course that he will find out many things, and many of them are not pleasant. I’ll leave it at that, but suffice it to say that Jessica Biel owns the role of The Sinner—a woman whose present life is suddenly and without warning, ripped unmercifully apart by her past. It’s a gripping crime drama, but not one for those under sixteen, due to the often lurid subject matter and the sexual situations.  

And in the same vein (repressed young woman whose life takes a bizarre turn), we have Thelma, a 2017 film by the Norwegian director Joachim Trier. After seeing this film, I ask--what scares you? As a former horror movie aficionado, I find that as I get older, it’s not the blood and guts horror films that really scare me. The films that have the greatest impact on me, the ones that linger in my mind long after they’re over, the ones that scare me when I think back on them--are the films that create the suggestion of terror, of horror, of the supernatural. They’re the films that have an ominous cloud hanging over them, a cloud that creates paranoia and murkiness. They’re the films where nearly everything that happens has some sort of darker meaning. In Thelma, crows have a special meaning. Panic attacks similar to epileptic seizures have a special meaning. Thelma’s father and mother understand this. Is Thelma a witch? Has she inherited her grandmother's psychological disorder involving the ability to use psychokinesis to change situations that upset or anger her (think of the main protagonist in the 1976 film Carrie). Or is she just a disturbed young woman whose meeting with first love just happens to be a lesbian relationship, which throws her psyche into direct conflict with her repressive religious upbringing that both her parents have foisted upon her. What horrific secrets lie in her past to explain her present life? There are secrets, and there are unpleasant revelations that can only lead to one outcome—again, that the past rears its ugly head to upset the present, because the past cannot be repressed forever. Repressed feelings, if they cannot be normally expressed, find their way out in other ways. What will it take to free Thelma from her past? And what happens if she is freed from it? Eventually, she finds out, and the outcome is disturbing. Thelma is worth seeing; it’s a hard-to-define movie. Is it a psychological thriller or is it a horror film? I'd say it's both. It gives viewers chills down the spine, a sense of foreboding, an uncomfortable feeling, and a feeling of dread concerning (knowing) what comes next. Both Thelma and The Sinner excel in this regard.  

   

Worth seeing--Timelapse of the Entire Universe

This video--Timelapse of the Entire Universe--is pretty incredible and worth seeing. Check it out here.

Wanting winter to end

This winter seems to be dragging on forever. I cannot wait for it to end. I cannot wait for spring to come, bringing with it sunshine, light, warmth, flowers, birds, garden life, and all the other nice things associated with spring and summer. Me, I’m no winter girl. I like living in a place with four seasons, but this year it feels like the only season has been winter, winter, and more winter. It’s been nonstop cold and snow since November, and this past summer was fairly lousy since it rained a lot. Enough already. Bring on the sunshine……

I suppose I shouldn’t complain, but I’m entitled to at least one negative comment before I return to the ‘Ok, this is how it is’ demeanor. There’s nothing to do about the weather, I know. My mother used to say that all the time, and she’s right. I don’t think I ever heard her complain about the weather. She went out walking in rain or sunshine, snow or sleet. She was a role model, but it’s tough to emulate her. Sometimes I wonder how she did it, how she stood it, without complaining. She so rarely complained.

I usually don’t mind winters. But when there is snow on the ground all the time, when the sidewalks are icy and treacherous, when the roads and bicycle paths are the only travel paths prioritized, then I get sick of it. I think I have a touch of cabin fever this year. Cabin fever “is an idiomatic term for a claustrophobic reaction that takes place when a person or group ends up in an isolated or solitary location, or stuck indoors in confined quarters for an extended period. Cabin fever describes the extreme irritability and restlessness a person may feel in these situations” (Wikipedia).

I can relate to the restlessness. I am used to being outdoors, to walking a lot, to working in my garden. I cannot do these things now. Walking here in Oslo is treacherous since many of the sidewalks are not cleared properly; this is true not only of this winter, but of past winters. No one picks up a shovel to clear a path for anyone. They all wait for the city officials to organize it. I think the city officials don’t give too much of a damn about how treacherous the sidewalks are. They care more about the fact that the bicycle paths are cleared, for the small number of people (mostly the Foodora bicyclists) who use these paths. Ah well. My consolation is that New York is not having a much better time; it too has had a record amount of snow, and another storm is predicted for the Hudson Valley this week. As is another storm for Oslo. Let winter be over soon, please.

Pigeon outside our kitchen window waiting to get fed

The pigeons wait for us to enter the kitchen each morning during the wintertime. They know we'll be putting out sunflower seeds and they can't wait to eat! Sometimes they'll peer in to see if we're there; other times they tap on the metal windowsill outside the window, letting us know that they're there and waiting. Birds rule.

Way to go, Dick’s Sporting Goods!

Thank you, Edward Stack, CEO of Dick’s Sporting Goods, for doing something that not one politician seems to have the guts to do—take a real stand against the idiocy that passes for gun control in America. You did so on February 28^th, 2018, a day that should go down in American history as a turning point in the gun control war that has paralyzed politicians and polarized America. You got involved, you took a stand, you stood up for what’s right. You stated clearly that you were “deliberately steering your company directly into the storm over gun reform” and that you were “immediately ending sales of all assault-style rifles in your stores”. You also said that your store “would no longer sell high-capacity magazines and would also require any gun buyer to be at least 21, regardless of local laws” (https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/28/business/walmart-and-dicks-major-gun-retailers-will-tighten-rules-on-guns-they-sell.html). Way to go, Dick’s Sporting Goods! I applaud you. You stood up to the National Rifle Association (NRA) and showed up the politicians for the spineless wimps they really are (so many of them are in the NRA’s pockets).

Walmart followed your example later in the day. I applaud them as well, and the many companies who stood up to the NRA last week, publicly ending their relationships (discounts, etc.) with them.

The NRA has about 5 million members according to many of the online sites I checked for information about this organization. The population of the USA in 2017 was 324,459,463 people. Five million members is circa 1.5% of the entire population. So tell me why this group wields so much power over America’s politicians? They’re no more than a minuscule percentage of the entire population. But they hold the politicians firmly in the palms of their hands. It all boils down to money, as does nearly everything in this world. They buy the politicians, and the politicians don’t want to lose the campaign contributions and support they get from the NRA, so their stances on gun control are those that are foisted on them by the NRA. The NRA are excellent lobbyists for their cause, I’ll give them that. But beyond that, I see no reason for why their points of view should determine public policy on an issue as important as gun control.

I am not opposed to hunters owning a hunting rifle (think Winchester or Marlin models) if the owner uses it to hunt animals or for protection out in the wild. But I have zero understanding for why any hunter would need an assault-style rifle like an AR-15 (used in wartime) to kill a deer or an elk. I have zero understanding for why any hunter would defend the use of assault-style rifles against any animal. They were designed for use in wartime, nothing more and nothing less. I don’t care if you are sound in mind and body; you cannot in good conscience defend ownership of assault-style rifles for hunting. My take on it is that you buy one of these rifles knowing full well that you may use it on a human being. You may think this is what it takes to defend your house, property and family. I have a hard time trying to imagine how you think or why you defend these weapons for personal use, together with the NRA. All I know is that how you think has evolved into how many people apparently think these days in modern America. The Second Amendment of the US Constitution certainly did not have assault-style rifles in mind when it said that we as Americans have the right to bear arms (The Second Amendment reads: "A well-regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed"). Let’s amend that Amendment to something that makes sense, not continue to support a misguided idea that owning and using such weapons are protected by law. Really, use your heads, use the common sense God gave you. Dick’s Sporting Goods and Walmart finally did. Kudos to them. 

Seasonal contrasts

Apropos my previous post, I'm a spring and summer person, and when you look at these photos, you'll understand why. I can't wait to get back to my garden (a plot in the Egebergløkka community garden). These photos are from last August, when the garden was in full bloom. There is nothing like it--warm sun, the greenery, the beauty, the peace. Summer cannot come too soon. I'm hoping for a sunny and hot summer.

A cold winter in Oslo this year

We are currently experiencing a cold spell—Arctic temperatures—making it difficult to be outdoors. This winter has been one of the longest on record (my record); it has dragged on and on, with snow one week followed by a quick thaw, then plunging temperatures that make roads and sidewalks icy, and then the snow starts all over again. This must be a record year for snowfall; I cannot remember this much snow in all the years I’ve lived here. I’m hoping this is an aberrant year and that next winter we’re back to ‘normal’, however that is defined. I actually have not had much cause for complaint; the winters in Oslo are not very different from those I left behind in NY. The main difference is the shorter days here and the intense darkness. It’s sometimes hard to adjust completely to that.

Winter does have its charms, and when the temperatures are not bitingly cold, I am outdoors walking and taking photos. I took these photos last week on one of my regular walks around St. Hanshaugen park.

1970s style--I feel so bad by Kungs ft Ephemerals

When I first saw this video, I was intrigued. I like the song 'I feel so bad' by Kungs ft. Ephemerals. But I really like the video-- with the self-possessed and tough woman who makes her entrance--all eyes on her--and then proceeds to rob the men in the room of their wallets and jewelry. It reminded me of the film Jackie Brown from 1997. I'm not sure why, because the woman in the video doesn't look like Pam Grier's character Jackie Brown in the film. But she does look like another badass character that Pam Grier played--Coffy, from the 1973 film Coffy. In that film, which I have not seen, but for which I remember the posters advertising it, Pam Grier's hairstyle was an afro like the woman in the music video (google Pam Grier Coffy and check out some of the images--I won't post them here due to potential copyright infringement). And the clothing style in the music video is a 1970s disco look. So if the music video creators were going for the look of that era, they succeeded. And the song is pretty damn good too.

One day soon, it’s bye bye Apple....

......Well, in the foreseeable future—when the batteries in my iPad and iPhone die. Both devices are slowing down; the iPad is older than the iPhone, so this is understandable. I haven’t had cause to complain until today, when suddenly my iPad was ‘forced’ to download and install the newest IOS software. Up until today I have managed to prevent the iPad from doing this, because I know that the newest software versions will only end up slowing down the device and rendering it obsolescent faster than if I don't install the upgrades. And it’s already slow, but I’m used to it. I’m fine with it because I mostly use my iPad to read Kindle books and to read emails/listen to music when I travel. When I turned it on today, I was unable to activate my device at all. I received the following error message instead:

Your iPad could not be activated because the activation server is temporarily unavailable. Try connecting your iPad to iTunes to activated it or try again in couple of minutes. If this problem persists, contact Apple support at apple.com/support.

So I did what I normally do in such situations—got irritated, then googled ‘why can’t I activate my iPad?’ And wouldn’t you know, this is a problem for others too, and is connected to the installation of the newest IOS software, which I didn’t want and which I have prevented from being installed up to this point by always pressing the ‘Remind me later’ option when prompted to download the newest software. But for some unknown reason, it installed itself between Friday evening and this morning (the iPad was off during that whole time) and created a problem on which I used most of my afternoon—how to reactivate my iPad. Not nice, Apple. Could someone explain to me how this happened?

You ask, why don’t I want the new software? Well, it’s a well-known fact that Apple (and probably other companies) deal in ‘planned obsolescence’ as discussed in a recent article in Forbes: https://www.forbes.com/sites/adamsarhan/2017/12/22/planned-obsolescence-apple-is-not-the-only-culprit/#5fff6f7f3cf2  Here’s the opening paragraph of this article:

Apple just got smacked with a class action lawsuit after the tech giant admitted it slowed down older iPhones. This act is also known as planned obsolescence. Wikipedia defines planned obsolescence (or built-in obsolescence) as: "in industrial design and economics is a policy of planning or designing a product with an artificially limited useful life, so it will become obsolete (that is, unfashionable or no longer functional) after a certain period of time."

Here’s another article dealing with the same: https://www.cultofmac.com/77814/is-apple-guilty-of-planned-obsolescence/; planned obsolescence forces us to buy new gadgets sooner than we want to. I don’t like this one bit. For the first, I don’t want to be buying new devices every other year. I’m not interested and I’m not that wealthy. Nor do I need to be cool by having the latest gadgets; I don’t care about this at all. I care more about the environment and about using things until they simply cannot be used anymore; we don’t need to pollute the world with lithium batteries year after year, when we don’t know how to deal with them at all.

So what did I learn from googling this problem about not being able to activate my device? I found the following website that discussed the problem and gave some solutions: https://www.macworld.co.uk/how-to/ipad/how-activate-old-ipad-after-update-3638936/. I tried what was suggested there--connected my iPad to iTunes on my laptop and tried to ‘recover’ my iPad (updating that keeps the current setup). It didn’t work. So I had to opt for ‘restoring the factory defaults’, which essentially resets the entire iPad. This took a long time, with promptings along the way to type in different passwords and pass codes to this and that. Finally, I was able to activate my iPad, and what I ended up with was an iPad that had installed all the apps that are currently on my iPhone—in other words, way too many. But at least that was something—I didn’t have to download all the apps again from the app store. I deleted the apps I didn’t need on my iPad and opened my Kindle app. I had to download all the unread books again, and adjust the settings back to where I had them. Then I went to Music, and realized that I have to download all the songs in my library so that I can listen to them offline, like when I travel and there’s no wi-fi. I’m saving this job for another time. Something else I don’t understand; we buy these songs from Apple and yet they’re not ‘ours’. If I buy them and download them once to my music library, why aren’t they mine? This is amazingly and unnecessarily complicated.

I have no idea how these things are done on devices made by the other cell phone/tablet companies. They cannot be that much different. But it’s getting to the point where I prefer simplicity in all things. Why can’t Apple make it simple to use their devices, and leave it up to the individual user to decide whether he or she wants to install software that will in many cases deactivate their devices? We paid for them. Why can’t we decide when we want to upgrade them? At least on computers running Windows software, an upgrade doesn't result in the deactivation of the computer. Now I have new IOS software on an old iPad. Let’s see how long my ‘new’ old iPad survives. I’m betting not past summer, at which point I’m going to buy a cheap computer tablet (not an iPad), or simply a Kindle from Amazon.   

Our latest article published in Inflammatory Bowel Diseases

Our article about a DNA repair protein (NUCKS1) and its expression in ulcerative colitis and colorectal cancer was finally published in the journal Inflammatory Bowel Diseases. If you'd like to read the article and see what it is I do when I'm not writing this blog, check out the link here:  https://academic.oup.com/ibdjournal/article-abstract/24/3/593/4863715

As always, the work that goes into a scientific article is a true group effort. So I thank all of my co-authors for helping to get it to this point. We'll be celebrating with some champagne one of these days. Congratulations are in order.

The wisdom of Ray Bradbury

I saw this on Twitter today and wanted to share it with you. It is so often true. Our minds, with all the worries, anxieties and compulsions, gets in the way of writing. We get in our own way; we block ourselves from being effective and productive. I am no exception. The happiest times I know as a writer are when I am writing unreservedly, letting the words flow out of me. I can go back and edit them later. The point is to get what I want to express, written down, so that the thoughts are not lost forever.

More Lincolns and less Trumps

There has always been contention and conflict in American politics. You need only watch Lincoln, Steven Spielberg's terrific movie from 2012, to see how the politicians of that time behaved toward each other, how they argued and fought with each other, and ultimately how making deals and utilizing their networks was what moved them toward consensus and solution. This was business as usual. Yes, the arguments were heated at times, feelings were hurt, and people didn't speak to each other. But they got over it and moved on. That doesn't seem to be happening now. If 2017 has taught us anything, it's that the behavior of the president and some congressmen is not business as usual. They seem to be in it for themselves, and to have forgotten about what's good for America. They want unquestioning loyalty to the president no matter how badly he behaves, and obedience to their whims and demands. We need better politicians, people who are truly interested in working to make society better for the people they represent, not for themselves. We need politicians who are not afraid to challenge the status quo, but who do so in a civilized manner, without crudely attacking others. Our job as non-politicians is to listen to what they have to say and to consider what it is they stand for and how they want to change America. Our job is to be actively engaged in protecting and caring for our society and our traditions, protecting what we stand for, protecting the values our country was founded on. Our job is not to be blindly loyal to any politician or dogma. Yes, America is my country and I am loyal to her, but I will object to all forms of abuse of power, whether nationally or internationally. Constructive criticism is also a part of being an actively-engaged citizen. Additionally, a civilized society respects quiet time, reflection and reasoning, and we need more politicians who appreciate these things. President Lincoln was a man who knew their value and who utilized them in his decision-making. We need more Lincolns and less Trumps.

The media cover every little thing that is said and done by politicians (among others), ad nauseum. I believe in the necessity of a free press. But I also believe in a citizen's right to privacy. It's not necessary to dissect every little thing about an individual. To dissect means to 'cut to pieces' and is usually done to a dead animal for scientific/medical purposes. Dissections of political figures are not necessary, at least not on a daily basis. The media dissect politicians and politics to a point where we cannot escape, no matter how hard we try. The constant unrelenting coverage is like a hungry animal that consumes us; the problem is is that it's never satisfied. Sometimes my reaction is to take a break from all the coverage, to seek silence and peace. Because silence and peace are what are needed to allow for reflection on the events of the world and how one might want to tackle them. It is ok to say that 'yes, I've had enough of the world's problems for one day', and to go for a long walk in nature. It's ok to want to start the day by feeding the birds, watching how they start their day. It's ok to start the day with a prayer of thanks for another day of life. It's ok to want to start the day with a peaceful soul. Because God knows that your half hour of reprieve won't last long. You will face spouses, friends, and colleagues who want nothing more than to discuss with you the latest political or world news: Trump, all the atrocities committed in the name of patriotism, why this, why that, the world is coming to an end, civilized society is coming to an end. My retort is that we need to seek refuge from the coming zombie apocalypse. That usually silences the fatalists. But who knows, that could be a relevant scenario in a few years--a genetically-engineered virus that spreads rapidly, infecting its victims and causing them to become 'anger zombies', similar to the zombies in the horror film '28 Days Later'.

This is what I don't want each day, at least when I first wake up. I don't want to start my day being bombarded with all of the bad news in the world. I want to say hello to the birds outside my kitchen window, to give them some food to start their day, to watch them for a few minutes. I want to make some coffee, putter around my kitchen in complete peace and quiet, ignoring the presence of the newspaper that will invade my day. I do read it, but I start with the comics, as they give me some fortitude to face the coming day. I need fortitude because our days are nothing short of frustrating and complicated. Bureaucracy, rules and regulations are the order of business. Our bosses and co-workers require our attention or interrupt us during the day with their concerns. Plans that have been discussed and agreed upon at multiple meetings are tossed aside in order to remake them in a new image. Our society is in constant upheaval, everywhere you turn. The seasons in nature do not change like this; the change is more orderly. Spring leads to summer leads to autumn. Autumn doesn't arrive and then suddenly decide that nature must return to July again. It would be a bizarre chain of events if such things happened in nature. But such bizarreness is almost the order of business now in the workplace and in politics.

I am looking for consistency and will never find it. I have accepted that now. I am looking for peace and quiet in a global society that has forgotten what peace and quiet are and why they are valuable for society. I am looking for manners, less aggression, more real feelings, more caring, more respect. I am looking for less egoism and more interest in the welfare of others. I wonder if we could all take a collective step backward and collectively breathe. Count to ten. Dig into our souls to find some patience, with ourselves and others. Be quiet. Be grateful. Stop forcing our ways of thinking down others' throats. Stop being aggressive. Stop being crude. Stop being Trump. For God's sake, start there.