Happy 2026!

(image by FreePik)

The society we live in

How would we make it through the years without humor? Without pointed commentary about the weird society we live in? Thank God for cartoonists, apolitical and political. They make us laugh and they remind us of our own small idiosyncrasies and idiocy. As always, Non Sequitur delivers. 

My little garden friend

I've been feeding the birds in the garden for the past two weeks. It's gotten harder for them to find food. There hasn't been any snow, but it's been cold and frost has formed on the grass, plants, and bench, and the ground has become quite hard. 

Last year around this time, I became aware of the presence of a sweet little robin, a European robin. They are much smaller than their American counterparts. He would fly to the bird feeder while I was filling the holders with seeds, and just sit there, watching me. Sometimes he was an arms-length away from me. He was curious about me and unafraid. If I moved to another part of the garden, he would fly to where I was and watch me intently. It seemed as though he and I were to be good friends. But then my life took another turn. 

My last visit to the cold winter garden was in mid-February, after which I battled influenza and then had surgery for a faulty cardiac mitral valve. I didn’t return to the garden until late May, by which time the birds were finding their own food, so feeding them was no longer necessary. Still, I kept feeding them. My little robin friend did not show during the summer or autumn months. But I kept hoping he would. 

One day last week, he suddenly reappeared, and it was as if he had never left. He perched at the feeder, patiently waiting for me to finish filling it. When I sat on the bench in front of the greenhouse, he flew over to be close to me, strolling across the frost-tipped grass near my feet. Then he hopped onto the bench and let me take a few photos of him. Here's a photo of him posing. He's a cutie. 

The Rascals - It's A Beautiful Morning

I woke up this morning and this song popped into my mind. This is the music we grew up with, and thank God for that. It is a cold day here in Oslo, but the sun is shining and that always makes my day brighter. Peace to all. 

Lyrics

It's a beautiful morning, ah

I think I'll go outside for a while and just smile

Just take in some clean fresh air, boy

(Ain't) no sense in staying inside

If the weather's fine and you got the time

It's your chance to wake up and plan another brand-new day

it's a beautiful morning, ah

Each bird keeps singing his own song, so long

I've got to be on my way now

(Ain't) no fun just hanging around

I got to cover ground, you couldn't keep me down

It just ain't no good if the sun shines

When you're still inside (shouldn't hide)

Still inside (shouldn't hide)

Still inside (shouldn't hide)

Still in-, oh, oh, oh-oh-oh

Oo-ooh-ah-ah

Oo-ooh-ah-ah

There will be children with robins and flowers

Sunshine caresses each new waking hour

Seems to me that people keep seeing more and more each day

(Gotta say) lead the way

(It's okay) brand-new day

(Gotta say) it's okay

Wednesday, Thursday, it's okay

Oh, oh, oh-oh

Oo-ooh-ah-ah

Oh, oh, oh-oh

Oo-ooh-ah-ah

Whoa, oh, oh, oh-oh

Oo-ooh-ah-ah

Oh (ooh-ah-ah)

Oh, oh, oh-oh

Oo-ooh-ah-ah

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Felix Cavaliere / Edward Brigati

O Little Town of Bethlehem (with lyrics) - Beautiful Christmas Carol / H...

This is the reason for the season--why we celebrate Christmas. Wishing all my readers a joyful Christmas! 

The ghosts of Christmases past

I borrow this line from Charles Dickens. As this year draws to a close, and we celebrate another Christmas together with family and/or friends or alone in some cases, I am reminded of all those who are no longer with us physically. People say they are with us in spirit, and I know they are. But I miss their physical presence at Christmas, starting with my parents (my father passed away forty years ago and my mother twenty-four years ago) and my brother who passed away ten years ago. I carry on the traditions I grew up with (Christmas tree, decorating the house, buying a panettone, making cookies), and luckily I am married to a man who appreciates the importance of traditions and whose family had their own traditions. It's never been a problem to combine our different approaches, and if anything, it's made celebrating Christmas that much nicer. I miss my husband's father who passed away thirteen years ago. I introduced him to panettone and he was hooked from the first bite. He loved all things Italian, but he loved a lot of things about America, among them the variety of pies that we have. I miss my husband's aunt who passed away in January of this year; she spent many Christmases with us, first with her husband who passed away seventeen years ago, and then alone with us after he died. She would come to our house for a few days and we would enjoy preparing for Christmas together. When I stand in my kitchen now during this holiday season, I remember them all. I remember them making pies, making struffoli, peeling and prepping vegetables, and making holiday dinners. They are memories that 'bless and burn' as my mother used to say. My mother said so many wise things, and I remember her for that and so much more. She loved Christmastime and all the preparations during Advent. What I remember too about my parents is that they shared their faith, together and with us. They were not afraid to practice their faith, and that is a gift for which I am forever grateful. 

The ghosts of Christmases past. The spirits of those whom I've known and loved. For me, the ghosts are not there to show me what I could have done better in the past, as the ghost in Charles Dickens' The Christmas Carol does with Scrooge. I am acutely aware of the ways in which the past could have been better, but for the most part, the past as I remember it, together with family and friends, was a happy and innocent time until we moved on with our own lives. The darkness of life had not yet invaded our individual lives. Family problems were present but not overwhelming. We went to church and shared our faith with other believers. We sang carols and Christmas hymns at mass. We admired the life-size creche that the church set up every year. Those times were special, if for no other reason than that we were young and life was still ahead of us. 

We celebrated Christmas Day with our individual families, but in the evening, after the big dinner was eaten, we met our friends and walked around the neighborhood, laughing and chatting. Some years there was a lot of snow, so we made snowballs and tossed them at one another. My brother was often with us. Friends were family too. I look at photos from that time, where my friends are sitting on our living room floor while my parents and my aunt are sitting on the sofa behind them. Sometimes we visited our friends' houses, where their parents had made a feast (and some great desserts), and we enjoyed them too. 

The past is a place I visit at this time of year, at least in my heart. I carry the memories of those I've loved and who loved me, and who are now deceased, and I think about them during my day. Their spirits remain, their wisdom and kindness remain, their individualities remain. I am the sum of all of them, because all of them have helped to shape me. My life is richer because they were and are a part of it.  

I wish all my readers a joyful Christmas, wherever you are in the world.

Les Imprimés - Only Love - BC182-45 - B Side

Another song I love listening to!

Miel de Montagne - J'y Peux Rien (Official Audio)

Love this song! 

Reflections on forgiveness--trying to understand what it means and doesn't mean

The murders of Rob and Michele Reiner triggered many reactions and feelings in me. When their son was arrested for their murders, I began to think about their other children and how they are feeling. Devastated for sure. Horrified that their brother is to blame. A horrific situation any way you look at it, starting with the murders; the parents had their throats slit and they were stabbed, according to the news reports. How can a son do this to his parents? How much hatred do you have to possess in order to do such a thing? People repeat the same phrase over and over--he is mentally ill. As though that should explain it all. It doesn't. The majority of mentally ill people are not violent, but some types of mental illness (schizophrenia and bipolar disorder) are more associated with violent behavior than others, as a recent article in The Lancet points out People with severe mental illness as the perpetrators and victims of violence: time for a new public health approach - The Lancet Public Health  Mental illness is not an automatic defense for dealing with killers nor should it be. 

How can the siblings of Nick Reiner forgive him for what he did to their parents? I'm not sure they can. I don't know that I could forgive a sibling for doing such a horrible thing. I have experienced a few major hurtful and disturbing behaviors (not murder) in my life, and I honestly cannot say that I forgave the perpetrators, at least not for a long time afterward. What is forgiveness, really? According to what I have gathered from my online reading and from what my religion teaches, forgiveness involves letting go of angry and bitter thoughts and the desire for revenge. It does not mean that one is to eradicate these feelings, something that is not possible since we are human beings with feelings. The desire for revenge is strong. Forgiveness does not mean that one forgets what has happened. It does not mean condoning what has happened, or even necessarily trying to understand why it happened. I spent several years trying to figure out why someone would behave so badly to me, and that prevented me from moving on with my life. I did a lot of reading about evil and bad behavior at that time in my life, which did help. But no amount of trying to explain evil and bad behavior will erase the fact that it happened, and that it happens every day in the world at large. People can be horrible to each other on a personal level or horrible to others generally (think bullying and social media bullying, abuse, pedophilia, domestic violence, rape, murder, war and related aggression). The list is long and such behaviors have been around for centuries. Evil exists, even though many people would prefer not to label it as such, because they're not comfortable with the idea of evil spirits, demons, and the like. No one is comfortable with that idea, but many religions acknowledge the existence of evil and evil spirits, the Catholic Church being one of them. 

I grew up with Catholic teachings. The older I get, the more I believe that true evil exists and that it cannot be explained away by science or rational thought. The latter is more comforting to believe, that if we just somehow find the right explanation, we will be able to find a cure for preventing evil behavior. It will never happen. In one way, by acknowledging that evil exists, our response to evil can be simpler. We can 'forgive' the perpetrator of evil acts in the sense that we can let go of wanting vengeance, let go of wanting explanations, let go of wanting to know why. But we can never forget what happened, nor should we. What we have experienced can guide us to better decisions and choices. Don't trust the wrong person when your gut tells you not to, don't allow narcissists to manipulate you, don't tolerate abuse of any kind (walk away if possible), protect yourself and your sanity at all costs. Because the cost of not doing so can be high down the road. Living with evil or in an evil environment can cost you your health down the road. In this sense, it is easier to 'forgive' a person who has wronged you in order to move on and away from what has happened to you. But it does not mean compassion or empathy for the perpetrator of an evil act, nor should it. There should be real consequences for evil behavior. 

It's interesting that Christ came to save humanity, to collectively forgive our sins. At one point, he says 'forgive them Father, for they know not what they do' in relation to those people who wanted him dead. I'm not sure I agree with the latter part of the statement. I believe those who made the decision to end the life of Christ knew exactly what they were doing, which makes them that much more evil in my opinion. But perhaps some of the soldiers and people who were ordered to crucify him were ignorant. But does that make his death more palatable? Are these people off the hook? 

It's best not to live a life burdened by anger and bitterness, burdened by the desire for revenge. It's also best not to live a life burdened by PTSD, anxiety, nightmares and the other unfortunate consequences of having been the victim of evil behavior or evil situations in general. I think of the the innocent victims of the countless wars throughout the world, the nearly 3000 people who died in the 9/11 World Trade Center attacks in 2001, the more than 1200 people who were brutally murdered (and raped first in the case of women) in Israel on October 7, 2023, the countless number of children who have died in USA school shootings, the 77 victims of Anders Behring Breivik in 2011 in Norway, the two young Norwegian women murdered in Morocco in 2018, the young women in Jeffrey Epstein's world who were abused to satisfy the insatiable evil lusts of the men in that world, and the countless number of children abused by pedophile priests and pedophiles generally. The list of evil behaviors is long. How do you go on living after experiencing such things, if in fact you did/do survive? How do the families of the victims go on living? A number of the survivors and their family members don't--they commit suicide because they can't deal with the aftermath. 

So if forgiveness is letting go in order to be free of the feelings of anger, bitterness, vengeance and to deal with anxiety and other major mental issues after having been wronged by another, then forgiveness is a good thing in my opinion. It is not for the benefit of the perpetrator, it is rather for the benefit of the wronged. I don't know if this is in line with Catholic teachings, but I find it hard to accept that I should 'free' the perpetrator, especially if the perpetrator has gone on to other evil acts and shows no interest or signs of becoming or wanting to become a better person, ready to take his or her punishment. Freeing the perpetrator is a job that belongs to the divine. It is only when the perpetrator meets with his or her victims/families of the victims and asks to be forgiven that the picture changes--only when the perpetrator is ready to take his punishment. At that point, I still don't know what I would do, I guess it depends on the type of evil, the type of crime committed. I know what Christ would do. But that doesn't make it any easier to know what I would do. 

Peace on earth, good will toward others?

This is the Christmas season, the season of good will toward others and the hope for peace on earth. But I'm not seeing it or finding it really anywhere. Not in the news, that's for sure. Normally I try to stay away from the news that's thrown at us ad nauseam 24/7, but this past week the insanity of the world seeped in anyway. It's insidious that way. The shootings at Bondi Beach Live updates: Australia Bondi Beach shooting kills at least 15, details on suspects emerge | CNN and Brown University Live updates: Search for Brown University shooter continues as FBI releases photos of suspect | CNN, the wars that continue all over the world and the escalating tensions associated with them, and now the murders of Rob Reiner and his wife Michele, by none other than their deeply-troubled son Nick, a man who seems to be filled with hatred for his parents December 15, 2025 Rob and Michele Reiner found dead in LA home | CNN. 

Hell on earth. Do we need to believe in an afterlife that sorts the dead into those bound for heaven and those bound for hell? If you ask me, we're living in a hell of our own making. In many parts of the world, there are leaders who are basically horrible human beings, defined by their greed, desire for power at all costs, vengeance, and hatred. Leaders who want nothing more than total power over people who want nothing more than an average ordinary life where they can afford to buy the necessary things for their families. A world defined by subjugation and abuse of women and children. A world where technocrats have become oligarchs, in possession of billions of dollars and spending money on themselves instead of helping the world. Mackenzie Scott is not one of them, I want to point out. She is an inspiration. How much money does a person need to live a comfortable life? When is enough, enough? When? Apparently never for many of these people, many of whom are loathsome men whose sexual appetites also know no bounds. Lust for money and lust for women. To all the average ordinary men and women who support these types of men in politics, I just have one question, Would you feel comfortable leaving your teenage daughter alone in a room with any of them? I'm betting the answer is no, but you're willing to overlook their pedophile behavior in the hope that some of their wealth will trickle down on you. Keep hoping. Your brains are addled by the obsession with money. You swear that these men have your best interests at heart. Keep dreaming. 

So it doesn't feel like much of a Christmas season to me this year. Add to the above the rampant commercialism that overshadows just about every other aspect of Christmas. Children would do well to be reminded by their parents that there are poor children in the world who will never get the amount of presents that they do. It's not wrong to discuss this with them. It's not wrong to let them know that they are privileged. Because they are. And we are. 

Who is the inspiration of this season? Christ. It would behoove us to remember that and be thankful for everything we have. To shut out the major darkness of the world by turning toward the light and the sun. We don't need more material things, we need more spiritual insight, peace of soul, kindness, civility, charity and hospitality. We need more hope that we can have a better world with better leaders. We need to 'light one candle rather than curse the darkness'. As I write this, I realize that I need to be reminded of that myself. 

Sia - Snowman [Official Video]

Sweet song for the Christmas season. When I first heard it I thought it was Rihanna singing. Cute animation as well. 

A poem for Christmas--Silent Stars

I wrote this poem years ago when I was a teenager. I have always loved the spirit of Christmas, remembering back to those days when our parents, schools and churches prepared us for the birth of the savior. Life was simpler then, or at least it feels that way from the vantage point of now. I started writing poetry when I was young and have continued throughout my life. It was a focus during my teenage years when little else except my studies held my attention. Writing poetry was a way of escaping into myself, of getting away from the outside world that demanded my utmost attention. I can't even begin to imagine how much the outside world demands of teenagers now, but from what I see and read on social media, it seems that the demands are overwhelming. These were my thoughts way back when......

Silent Stars

Wander across sea and sky--
Stars nightborne in flight.
Carry on across all time--
Centuries ago began your light.
Go on and move into the night.
Your silence is heard then,
Your light has touched all men.
And once upon ago two thousand years,
You shone upon no ordinary man. 

Copyright Paula M De Angelis

All rights reserved. 

A poem for this Christmas season--The Advent Wreath by James Palmaro

My friend Jean sent me this poem about Advent wreaths. It's a lovely poem written by James Palmaro, a poet who is blind. 

The Advent Wreath

The leaves are all gone, the trees are barren and bare,

The autumn winds are chilling, yet anticipation’s everywhere. 

It is the Advent season, 

The winter nights grow near, 

We search for the warmth inside ourselves, 

Wreaths are everywhere.

Cousins to our Christmas trees that bring us joy and brilliance,

We place them in and on our homes, 

And they remind us of resilience.

Circular in shape, symbols of connection

That despite the cold and dark of night 

We’ll find light and resurrection.

The enigma that is MTG

Georgian Republican Marjorie Taylor Greene announced this past week that she will be resigning from Congress on January 5, 2026. 47 reacted by applauding her decision and saying that she 'went bad'. He questioned her loyalty to him and to the Republican party. It is true that her behavior and statements have changed radically during the past few months. It's almost as though she's had some sort of awakening--a conversion of sorts. One could only hope. This is a woman who supported 47 wholeheartedly and brashly through his first term and into his second. Her brand of loyalty bordered on cultish. She was fond of conspiracy theories and her rhetoric did nothing to stop the fanning of the flames of hatred in the USA; it rather promoted division among the American people. She was no moderate Republican as she is now being portrayed. She was positioned firmly on the extremist right and was an ardent supporter of QAnon (Legislator criticism of a candidate’s conspiracy beliefs reduces support for the conspiracy but not the candidate: Evidence from Marjorie Taylor Greene and QAnon | HKS Misinformation Review). 

Why is she resigning? Is it just that her very public rift with 47 has damaged her future political chances? Or does she see an opportunity to reinvent herself and her potential political future? Is she deeply upset over how 47 has treated her, or was she prepared for the fallout? After all, she pushed and pushed for the release of the Epstein files/emails which 47 opposed, and they are now being released with his support. One could question his motives for his sudden reversal on this issue. I think he understood that it was politically savvy to do so. After all, he could see that the tide was turning against him, that he is losing his group of core supporters, and that can't happen. He has to control the narrative. Mark my words, in a month or two everyone will think that he was instrumental in pushing for release of the files. MTG will be a footnote to that story, as is the case for most people who oppose him. 

I'd like to believe that she underwent a true change of heart. She did apologize for fanning the flames of hatred and for her hateful rhetoric. God does work in strange ways. Perhaps we are witnessing a real conversion in action. But being the doubting Thomas that I am (and I am), I want more proof that she is a changed person. Time will tell. She is an enigma, and she is not likely to be pinned down or figured out any time soon. Perhaps she wants it that way. Or perhaps she really did get tired of the political games in Washington DC. Perhaps she found out that she was not really welcome at the party, or that she was welcome at the party as long as she continued to spout the party line. I find it interesting that she said that she had no desire to be a 'battered wife', accepting the bad behavior and remaining in her appointed place. I applaud her for following her conscience if in fact it is her conscience that is guiding her. But as I said, I want more proof that she is a changed individual. From a spiritual context, it's always possible that one can seek forgiveness and find it if one is willing to change one's ways. Anything is possible with God. Good for her if that's the case. She grew up, woke up, and did something about her past behavior. That's what God asks. Perhaps it will inspire others to do the same, and perhaps that's what 47 is most afraid of. 

Coldplay - Speed Of Sound (Official Video)

I listened to this song today and was transported to a place inside myself that I guard fiercely--that place that treasures music and lyrics. It's not just my heart but my mind and soul as well. How wonderful it is that we can fill our worlds with music, especially in times like these, where absolutely nothing is certain or sacred. Music and lyrics live on eternally. One hundred years from now, the world can listen to this song and wonder about the lives of the men who wrote and sang it, and about the conditions that created it. Creativity never ceases to intrigue me--how it happens, where ideas come from. I like to think that the collective unconscious is always floating above us and that we can reach up and pluck an idea or two from it. And do something with it that makes it uniquely our own. I love that idea. That has definitely been the case for me and my writing. I recognize poetry when I hear it in music and I am grateful that others write it too. It's not dead if it lives on in music. Here are the lyrics to Speed of Sound by Coldplay: 

How long before I get in?

Before it starts, before I begin

How long before you decide?

Before I know what it feels like

Where to, where do I go?

If you never try, then you'll never know

How long do I have to climb

Up on the side of this mountain of mine?

Look up, I look up at night

Planets are moving at the speed of light

Climb up, up in the trees

Every chance that you get is a chance you seize

How long am I gonna stand

With my head stuck under the sand?

I'll start before I can stop

Or before I see things the right way up

All that noise, and all that sound

All those places I got found

And birds go flying at the speed of sound

To show you how it all began

Birds came flying from the underground

If you could see it then you'd understand

Ideas that you'll never find

All the inventors could never design

The buildings that you put up

Japan and China, all lit up

The sign that I couldn't read

Or a light that I couldn't see

Some things you have to believe

But others are puzzles, puzzling me

All that noise, and all that sound

All those places I got found

And birds go flying at the speed of sound

To show you how it all began

Birds came flying from the underground

If you could see it then you'd understand

Oh, when you see it then you'll understand

All those signs, I knew what they meant

Some things you can't invent

Some get made, and some get sent

Ooh-ooh

Birds go flying at the speed of sound

To show you how it all began

Birds came flying from the underground

If you could see it then you'd understand

Oh, when you see it then you'll understand

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Christopher Anthony John Martin / Guy Rupert Berryman / William Champion / Jonathan Mark Buckland

Speed of Sound lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Mgb Ltd.

Who woulda thunk it?

The news that 47 has dumped MTG as an ally was of little surprise to me. Loyalty runs only one way in the current administration. The fact that she has lasted this long is the real surprise. If you question the leader, you're out. If you question powerful rich white men, you're out. You don't even get three strikes. 

What a farce politics has become. American and international politics--it doesn't really matter. It amazes me that things run as they should for the most part. But that's solely due to honest, ordinary, good people in politics who have morals and balls, and who stay out of the limelight, who aren't 'PR-kåte' (PR-horny) as the Norwegians would say. They do the jobs they were elected to do, or at least they try. The government shutdown in the USA shows that this is not always the case. But average ordinary people are not in charge when it comes to making the decision to shut down a government. I'm sure there were many underlings who cautioned their bosses about making the wrong decision for the good of America. But lately, it seems that very few decisions have to do with what's good overall for America. 

47 is now abandoning tariffs on beef, coffee, bananas and orange juice, among other foodstuffs (Trump cuts tariffs on beef, coffee and other foods as inflation concerns mount | Reuters ). Again, who woulda thunk it? Who did people think were going to pay for the tariff increases on groceries? The oligarchs that run the US economy? Not a chance. Anyone who thinks that oligarchy doesn't exist in the USA should think again. If you're a billionaire, baby, you've got it made. And you have an open door into the Oval Office as far as I can judge. 

We have young people now whose career choices veer toward being influencers or posting videos on Only Fans. Why? Money money money. Models, singers, and actors/actresses can make a fortune from selling their own lines of clothing and perfumes/colognes. Do you need a college education or a graduate school education for such things? No, all you need are fancy accountants and lawyers who take care of the whole shebang for you. But young people should take a long hard look at the statistics--there are very few who make it in these businesses, and you're shortsighted if you think you will. 

Everything is out of whack these days. Salaries for sports stars, actors/actresses, top-level leaders (don't get me started), businessmen, etc. I've been saying the same thing for ten or more years--when you pay superfluous department leaders at a hospital extremely high salaries, the money has to come from somewhere. You're extremely naive if you think that extra money is appropriated (from somewhere) to pay for these salaries. No, the money comes from the budgets that departments need in order to run their day-to-day functions. So the departmental budgets are cut, and ordinary employees are told that 'now we're going to work smarter and more effectively' in order to deal with the cuts. When you translate this bullshit, it amounts to that 'you're going to do the job of three people for the same salary as you have now, and you're going to work more hours in order to get the job done'. I've seen it so many times and it always ends up the same way. People quit when they figure out that they're being taken advantage of. And so it goes. Departments end up chronically understaffed. I view all of this from afar now that I no longer belong to the work world. Do I miss it? God, no. I know what hard work is, and I knew when what I did was appreciated and when it wasn't. You learn. Eventually you learn. It took me a while though. Am I a cynic? No. But I am a skeptical optimist. I have hope because I have faith, but that doesn't mean that I don't see the 'man behind the curtain' (think Wizard of Oz). There's a lot of bluster and arrogant talk and such, but it's covering up a lack of strategy and common sense. We need to get back to a world that values ethics and common sense. 

Random thoughts on a Friday morning

I train now three days a week--group training on Mondays and Wednesdays, and individual training on Fridays. The center where I train is four tram stops from my home, so it's convenient to get there. This morning's reflections--

• People on their way to work, stopping to buy their espressos and cappuccinos at Kaffebrenneriet (literally the coffee burner). I used to do that in Manhattan on my way to work each morning. 
• Stores opening for the day. 
• A gray autumn day, but a mild one. Kind of nice, actually. For once, the grayness doesn't bother me. I have no idea why. Maybe because I'm listening to my music and it energizes me. 
• Training has gotten me back into listening to music. I realize just how much I love dance music. I love training to dance music. I feel uplifted and happy. Carefree is the best way to describe it. Just about how I felt years ago on the dance floor. I used to love going to clubs on the weekends to dance. 
• People on the tram are preoccupied with their own things, listening to music on their phones or reading the news on their phones. Most people's faces are buried in their phones. 
• When I'm on the treadmill at the training center, I look out the window onto the roof below. A large number of pigeons sit there as well as on the electric wire above the roof. Looking down and out over the city. They sit there rain or shine. A bird's eye view--that must be kind of cool. I've always wished that I could fly. 
• I look out at the traffic pouring into the city. People on their way to work. The daily routine. I'm so glad I no longer have that routine. I appreciate my freedom, but it's been hard-earned. Over forty years in the workforce; that was long enough. I thought about myself as an employee. I probably wasn't the best employee in terms of listening slavishly to workplace leaders, but I have no regrets. Thankfully I chose research science, which imparts a fair amount of autonomy in terms of what one chooses to do each day. Meaning that I was quite free to pursue the research projects I wanted and luckily for many years, they were funded. 
• I talk to some of the people I train with. Many are interested in American politics and enjoy discussing them with me. I don't deter them. It's interesting to hear what non-Americans think about my country and the political chaos in which we find ourselves at present. We talk about what's going on in Europe too, because Europe is not immune to some of the polarizing ideologies that plague the USA at present. 
• I'm grateful for life. My prayer each morning is one of thanks--for life, for another day, for the people in my life who love me and whom I love. 

Halloween event at Frøyas Have in Oslo

Halloween has become a big deal here in Norway. According to recent sources, the Norwegians who celebrate Halloween use about 1.2 billion Norwegian kroner, which translates to about 118 million US dollars. That's a lot of money. This link describes how the popularity of Halloween has increased over the years (Halloween spending soars in Norway - Norway's News in English — www.newsinenglish.no), especially among young people and families with young children. 

When I first moved here, Halloween was not celebrated, and the idea of it was not popular. But that changed in the early 2000s, in part due to the availability of American films, including horror films, that depicted the fun and creepy Halloween goings-on. In 1997, I threw a Halloween party for my stepdaughter who was fourteen at the time. She wanted one and I thought it would be fun to do it. And it was. I remember that the costumes of the teenage girls and boys were pretty inventive--witches, vampires, zombies. One of the guys dressed up as a woman, and trust me, he did a great job. 

My husband and I attended a Halloween event at Frøyas Have in Oslo this past weekend. It was impressive. This was the first time such a Halloween-related event had taken place in Oslo, and it seemed to be well-attended. The Halloween park was set up as a collaboration between the companies Pilote Beauty and Gemino Art. It was billed as Europe's largest Halloween 'park'. I'd like to see more of these kinds of events--they're fun and creative and a little creepy (Halloween, Bydel Frogner | Halloween-park på Frogner utsatt for hærverk dagen før åpning: – Måtte være litt kreative)

Here are some photos of Halloween at Frøyas Have. Enjoy!

Travels in northern Norway this past July

My postoperative goal was to be well enough to do the trip that my husband and I had talked about and more or less planned before I became ill. As luck and the divine would have it, we embarked on our north Norway trip exactly three months to the day of my operation. Our plans were to drive to Trondheim, stay overnight, and then board the Hurtigruten (coastal boat) for a three-day (two-night) boat trip to Tromsø. I have visited Trondheim twice in previous years, but neither of those visits were particularly positive or memorable. This time was quite different, thankfully, and gave me the desire to return at some point to explore the city further. 

We boarded our boat--Midnight Sun--before noon. We were extremely lucky with the weather--sunny and warm, with temperatures in the upper 70s/low 80s. The absence of wind meant that there were no waves, which made me happy since that stretch of the coastal trip (from Bodø and through the Lofoten archipelago) is often subject to wind and waves. To be honest, I had some misgivings about doing the boat trip at all because of what I had heard about the rough waters, but my fears were laid to rest when we boarded the boat amid sunny skies and placid waters. The coastal route is among the most beautiful in the world from what I've read, and I'd simply have to agree after taking the trip. We enjoyed some excellent dinners on board, and otherwise relaxed on the deck, enjoying the sun and warmth. We were lucky to be able to visit Trollfjord (Trollfjord - Wikipedia), which apparently is a weather-dependent trip; the boat captain informed us that the nice weather allowed for this trip. It was incredible to see the mountain tops at midnight, which turn reddish in the midnight sun. As we drove out of Trollfjord, we were blanketed in a thick fog that seemed to roll in from nowhere. Rather mystical and fairytale-like; one almost expected to meet some mythical creatures like trolls in the dense fog. 

This is the coastal route of the Hurtigruten from Trondheim to Tromsø, courtesy of the Hurtigruten website:

Once we reached Tromsø, we stayed two nights at a hotel near the harbor, which gave us enough time to explore the city. We managed trips to the Arctic-Alpine Botanical garden and to the Polaria Aquarium during our short stay, and also visited the spectacular Arctic Cathedral. We also enjoyed a really great dinner at a restaurant called Skarven Kro; it serves a tomato-based fish soup that is to die for--stockfish (boknafisk) soup. 

We then drove on to Alta from Tromsø, driving over the Finnmark plateau (Finnmarksvidda), which is the largest plateau in Norway. Once in Alta, we visited the Tirpitz Museum, a WWII museum that details the story of the German battleship Tirpitz, which was sunk in the Tromsø fjord. We also visited the Alta Museum--a World Heritage center for rock carvings--which was fascinating. Before we left, I visited the Cathedral of the Northern Lights, which was lovely and very unique. The sunny and warm weather continued, which of course added to the positive experience of visiting these places. I'm not sure it would have been as pleasant in the cold and rain. 

From Alta, we drove further on to the east coast of Sweden, passing briefly through parts of Finland that we didn't particularly care for, until we arrived in Luleå (Luleå: History meets modernity in Swedish Lapland | Visit Sweden), where we stayed one night, and the following day, in Sundsvall, where we stayed one night, before driving westward back toward Norway. Both Luleå and Sundsvall were lovely cities on the water, and it was nice to be there in the warm weather, walking along the harbor areas and watching people enjoy themselves. 

I would like to return to Trondheim during the wintertime to see the northern lights; we can drive there or take the train. I would not want to take the Hurtigruten during the winter months, although my friends who have done it say it is also a lovely trip. But I wouldn't want to do the trip in the darkness and cold. I'm glad we did our northern Norway trip during the summer months; it was fun to experience the midnight sun and to experience this area of Norway during a period of wonderful weather. I'll publish another post soon with photos from the trip. 

Here is a map of the entire trip, but bear in mind that the Trondheim to Tromsø route is depicted on land, because Google Maps does not allow for boat routes: 

Autumn in Oslo and in my garden--October 2025

I usually publish a post about autumn in Oslo and in my garden each year, and this year is no exception. It's been a mild but rainy autumn this year, and the foliage colors are lovely. I still take a fair amount of photos, but less than I used to. The advantage is that I don't have to wade through so many lesser quality photos. So the ones I'm sharing in this post are the ones that made the cut. Enjoy......

Gamle Aker church

'Karl Johan' main path in our allotment garden

my Japanese maple tree, growing happily

my allotment garden, facing Telthusbakken

some plants are still growing and blooming

Joe Jackson - Steppin' Out

If there was ever a song that brings me right back to NYC during the 1980s, this is it. I remember the anticipation and the wonder attached to each venture out into the world of Manhattan on the weekends. Finding a place to dance was foremost in our minds, and the Limelight was the place to go to dance during the 1980s. We tried other dance clubs and discos as well, but always came back to the Limelight. I remember one evening when I was dressed to the nines and out on a date with a colleague who was also dressed to the nines. We were picked out of the crowd waiting to get into the Limelight, to visit their VIP room. I hardly remember what was so special about that room, just that I thought it was so much fun to have been chosen. I remember that I was wearing a Betsey Johnson dress that I loved and bright pink high-heeled shoes that were originally part of a bridesmaid ensemble. My date didn't like my shoes, but I didn't care, I wore them anyway. Those days were fun and adventurous, and to my mind, part of everything that makes those years in Manhattan special to me. I suppose one might call it nostalgia, but I just prefer to call them fun memories. No going back to those days, but when I think about how much I loved to go out dancing, those memories immediately come to mind. 

No comments needed

 Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis 

One of my two favorite comic strips these days; the other one is Peanuts. The latter was first published in 1950 and continued until Charles Schulz's death in 2000; it is amazingly relevant even though it's over seventy years old. 

Makes sense to me

Four by the Edgar Winter group

If you've never heard The Edgar Winter Group before, here's your chance. A great rock group from the 1970s......Their album, Shock Treatment from 1974, contains the following four songs that I personally love. Enjoy......

Easy Street - Edgar Winter group

Someone Take My Heart Away - Edgar Winter Group

Sundown - Edgar Winter Group

Miracle Of Love - Edgar Winter Group

The Church of St. Vincent de Paul

Whenever Jean and I are in Albany NY to visit our friend Maria, we go to Sunday mass at the Church of St. Vincent de Paul which describes itself as 'a place of courageous hospitality'. God knows that we need more courageous hospitality in the current political climate. The church is a welcoming place that practices what it preaches. You feel welcome there almost immediately as you step in the door, connected to the others around you. Parishioners sit in a circle around the altar that is placed in the middle. There is nothing old-school about this church, so those looking for an old-fashioned approach to mass and the church would be better served elsewhere. I happen to prefer this newer approach where parishioners are actively involved in the mass and have access to the altar. Some prefer more distance and I respect that too. In fact, I have no problems with either one, since my church in Oslo is more old-school and reserved, and I like being there too. But if you are alone in the world, or if you feel lonely, you might prefer a more open and connected church. Elizabeth Simcoe, the Parish Life Director, has this to say in the church brochure regarding the church's goal of hospitality and inclusivity: 

"Welcome to all, especially visitors, pilgrims and those seeking a spiritual home. We are glad you have found the Church of St. Vincent de Paul. We hope you will experience it as a community that is hospitable, prayerful, inclusive and committed to serving our neighbors". 

St. Vincent de Paul said the following: 

"Make it a practice to judge persons and things in the most favorable light at all times and under all circumstances". 

Again, a tall order in this world of ours. It means meeting strangers and people generally with an open mind and love in your heart. How many of us are able to do that? How many of us want to do that? In the brochure that describes the parish, there is another quote from Hebrews 13:1-2:

"Let mutual love continue. Do not neglect hospitality, for through it some have unknowingly entertained angels". 

Imagine that, that one may have entertained angels. It's a wonderful thought. Imagine too that our kindness toward another person may have resulted in that person finding the light they sought, finding the peace he or she desired, finding the gift of faith. Nothing more is asked of us than that we love our neighbor as ourself. I think it means being kind to others and since there is so little kindness in the world now, perhaps we could just start there, by making an effort to be kind when we really don't feel like it. That might go a long way toward restoring some amount of civility and respect in a world that seems to revel in the fact that they are long-gone, at least in the public and political arenas. 

Living through your phone

Yet another apt commentary from my favorite comic strip......

Celebrating fifty years in America

Apropos my last post, my friend Haika’s husband Ashok is celebrating fifty years since his arrival in the USA from India. He moved to the USA to start a new life, and he succeeded. He chose to celebrate by recreating his exact travel route to America in 1975 and then once in America, by reading the poem The New Colossus by Emma Lazarus. This poem is featured on the base of the Statue of Liberty. This is what America has meant and means to him. This is what the Statue of Liberty represents--a welcome to immigrants. 

Ashok at JFK 08-25-25.mp4 - Google Drive

Give me your tired, your poor

Emma Lazarus wrote this sonnet in 1883, and in 1903 the poem was cast onto a bronze plaque that was mounted inside the lower level of the Statue of Liberty's pedestal. We know parts of this poem since it is associated with the Statue of Liberty, which is one of the first sights immigrants see and saw when they first arrived in America. 'Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore'--these are the lines that most people are familiar with and that represent what America stands for and stood for a century ago. This is the entire poem: 

The New Colossus

by Emma Lazarus

Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,

With conquering limbs astride from land to land;

Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand

A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame

Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name

Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand

Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command

The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.

“Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!” cries she

With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor,

Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,

The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.

Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,

I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”

Copyright Credit: n/a

Source: Emma Lazarus: Selected Poems and Other Writings (2002)

Staying positive during and after illness

A number of friends have commented on my positive approach to life in light of the serious operation I underwent in April. What I know is that I was one of the lucky ones--operated on about a week after my diagnosis and extensive testing--and a three-month recovery that was not fraught with major problems. I was well-treated by the healthcare system in this country, and from my conversations with others who have experienced the system, I had an excellent experience. I am thankful for that. Because had I landed on a long waiting list for an operation, I may not have concluded thusly. And I probably would not be doing well at all. 

The positivity comes from knowing that my diagnosis was correct and that the resultant surgery was successful. None of these things is a given, especially the latter. The tests I went through were extensive and difficult, but tolerable. The mitral valve repair surgery that I underwent is at present fairly routine, but still, there are always risks with any kind of surgery where anesthesia is involved. I knew beforehand that my quality of life without surgery would be null. So there was no question in my mind that surgery was my only option. I wasn't afraid of it. I was rather afraid of not having it soon enough, because my quality of life prior to surgery was poor. I couldn't sleep and I had a hard time breathing properly. You don't live long with those symptoms--all signs of congestive heart failure. 

I am a scientist by training and a fairly pragmatic person. I understand the pros and cons involved in most medical procedures and I can discuss them rationally with the doctors and nurses. I was interested in my condition and in the different types of testing, and told them so. So they weren't afraid to be open about aspects of my treatment that they may not have discussed with another type of patient. There are some people who don't want to know any of the details, and that also has to be respected. But I wanted to know. 

So my positivity evolved out of the knowledge that my only option was surgery, and that it went well. I am grateful for a second chance in life. My brush with mortality has taught me to be grateful for every single day, and to be grateful for my husband and the friends who have remained in my life. There are people who distance themselves from you when you become ill. Perhaps they think you will ask them for help, or perhaps they are scared for themselves. In any case, I am happy to be together with those I can call real friends. With them, I can let down my guard and they know that I can tell them that I have good days and bad days. But the good days far outweigh the bad ones, and knowing that makes me smile. 

The great divide

Parable is a poem I wrote many years ago--my reflections on the great divide between the wealthy and the poor, inspired by the parable in the New Testament about the rich man and Lazarus (Luke 16:19-31 NIV - The Rich Man and Lazarus - “There was - Bible Gateway)

Parable

Lazarus in the street,
While in the penthouses above
The glitterati meet.
In the end I left
The glamour, the effete chic.
(Not that I belonged).
‘City of vipers’--
Women poised like cobras,
Bedecked in jewels and haughty crowns,
Ready to strike, tongues flicking.
Gold lame skins rise and fall
With their breathing.
Fixing you with their stares.
Outside the frost-edged window
Awaits the city---
The viper rich indoors
See it not, nor feel.
Teeth flash, capped, even, gleaming--
Fangs for the night about to end
About to start
That never ends, for reality 
Is a party, a toss of the coin--
One more Lazarus for the gutter,
One more snake for the pit. 

from Parables and Voices: A Collection of Poems 1973-2009: De Angelis, Paula Mary: 9781452838762: Amazon.com: Books

All rights reserved. Copyright Paula Mary De Angelis

Autumn and moving on

I have begun to wake up around 7 am, a very peaceful time of day. There is some noise outdoors--garbage collection, children crying because they don't want to go to daycare--those kinds of things. Nothing that is irritating. We have had a wonderful summer--sunny, warm, and pleasant. There have been intervals with rain, but they don't last very long before we're back to sunshine. I've loved every waking minute of it. When I wake up, I thank God for another day of life, and then putter about until my husband gets up. I get an early start on most household chores, which I like a lot. 

I love this time of year--the transition from summer to autumn. It's still warm during the day, but chilly at night. Great for sleeping. I don't always sleep straight through the night until morning, but no matter. I know that I can catch up on some sleep during the day. My first thought upon waking is often my garden. I so look forward to being there. Today is one of those days where I know I can be in my garden undisturbed by obligations and chores. I'm done with most of the garden chores--harvesting, pruning the berry bushes, cutting the grass, and planting new perennials. I'll plant garlic cloves at the end of September as well as some tulip bulbs and the like. The major garden cleanup can wait until spring; that way the birds and insects have plants to feed upon during the winter months. There are so many birds, bees, and butterflies in the garden at present. I love seeing them there. 

When the sun shines like it does today, I feel happy and free. When I get to the garden, perhaps I'll continue reading one of the books I started months ago. I did that on Sunday when we had Visitors Day in the garden. I haven't felt much like reading since my operation, but the desire is slowly returning. Visitors Day was enjoyable; I met many people who visited my garden, and we talked about plants and being on the waiting list to get an allotment garden. Several people commented on how beautiful my garden is. I thanked them. It is a beautiful garden that I've poured my heart and soul into. I'm proud of the results, but I know that none of it would have been possible without God's help. He has been with me every step of the way, and I feel that even more since my operation. Just knowing that I could return to working in my garden was a major goal during my recovery. It waited for me and took care of itself while I was ill. That's the beauty of a (mostly) perennial garden. Eventually the only thing you really need to do is water the garden a few times a week. 

I could focus on a few negative things that have happened recently, but I won't. Suffice it to say that I've learned who my real friends are, and I'm intentionally moving on from those who are not. People show you their true colors, especially when you are ill. My husband commented recently on the few friends here who showed up for me. It's not that they could help me very much--he has helped me the most--but they visited, took contact, sent get-well cards or bought me flowers. It meant and means a great deal to me. Just to be able to talk about what I went through and to let it out, has been a relief for me. A relief that some people would actually listen to me without wanting to jump in immediately and tell me that it's all going to be fine. A relief that some people made time for me. I will forever treasure how I was treated by the doctors, nurses, physiotherapists, and the health personnel generally. Their kindness stands out and washes away the carelessness of the so-called friends who are not friends. I choose to focus on the positive, and have support for that approach from Matthew Kelly's book The Fourth Quarter of Your Life: Embracing What Matters Most. It is truly a wonderful book about how to approach getting older/old, and I recommend it for anyone over fifty years of age. The wisdom contained in its pages is priceless. Old age is often referred to as the autumn and/or winter of life. It's fitting that I finished the book as we prepare for the autumn season. Reading the book freed me from worrying about how to deal with certain situations. I've made some intentional decisions and have let go of what hurt me or made me sad. Life is too short to focus on the callousness of others. I am not callous nor will I ever be. Society encourages that now, but it hasn't changed me. What matters most is how we love others, and also ourselves. What matters most is integrity and remaining true to our values and the voice in our soul that guides us onward in life. 

Caring and not caring

Sometimes the smartest and healthiest thing we can do for ourselves is to care less, not more. I don't mean that we should be uncaring toward others or that we should not love or prioritize others. I mean that sometimes we care too much about what others think of us in situations that do not warrant our attention, or we want to direct others through our caring, and these scenarios are not healthy. Sometimes we don't like how others behave toward us or how they talk to us. We should say--it's your problem, not mine. But often we don't do that. We end up getting dragged into their banal dramas when we should just ignore them and walk away. We should make a conscious effort to not care about what they mean or say about us. Hard to do, yes. But freeing. Because when you really learn to let go of caring about what other people mean about you, especially when they are hypercritical of you, you are free. In the same way, we free others to do and say what they want when we let go of our vision of how they should behave and what they should do and say. The key words are 'letting go', not hanging on. What's important is to let others be, and that means not grasping at them in an effort to get them to do what we think they should do. Grasping at them reveals a kind of desperation. It's not smart behavior. 

There are times in life when others are headed down the wrong path and we want to involve ourselves in order to stop them from making a mess of their lives. But if we haven't been asked for advice or our opinion on a certain matter, why are we getting involved? I'm not talking about children here who need guidance and direction, rather adults who can reason for themselves and make informed choices. Why are we inserting ourselves into others' lives when we've not been asked to do so? There are many well-meaning adults who want to control others, to fashion them according to their own viewpoints and beliefs. We should rather 'let go and let them' live the lives they want to live, regardless of the outcome. And in that way, we end up having fewer dramas and fewer irritating situations to deal with. Sometimes the outcomes for those others won't be happy, sometimes they may even be painful. But they are adult learning experiences. Pain can be a basis for emotional and psychological growth. We cannot prevent others from experiencing pain. 

There are situations when another's behavior/comments may hurt our feelings. Sometimes we are faced with having to choose a response to them. The question is what kind of response. Sometimes it's best to just to let them be that way. Sometimes that's the healthiest response of all. Their bad behavior is not our problem. Perhaps their behavior or comments are intended to provoke us, to make us irritated, sad, jealous or angry. Do we take the bait or do we walk away? Do we care or do we walk away and not care? More and more, I've begun to see the value in not caring. That way, I can reserve my energy for the situations where real caring and active love are warranted. And that way, I don't have to be dragged into another's dramas. That by itself is energizing and empowering.