Watching the Paris Olympics

Let's see.......while we were on vacation, the world situation continued on its present path and in some instances, worsened. The saving grace since we returned home has been watching the Paris Olympics. I watched the entire opening ceremony and enjoyed it, although it could have been a hour shorter and no one would have missed some of the filler entertainment. I thought it was very cool that they used the Seine River as the basis for all that occurred. I know also that it was a risky decision, given that the weather is very unstable and unpredictable, everywhere you go these days. And as luck would have it, it rained for most of the evening. But we got to see some really good entertainment, capped off by a phenomenal performance from Celine Dion. The media have had mixed reactions to the opening ceremony, but I don't get hung up on all of that. If we stay focused on the impressive jobs the young athletes are doing, then the Olympics have been a success so far. The USA swimming and gymnastic competitors (women and men) are doing a fantastic job. Congrats to Katie Ledecky and Simone Biles and her team for outstanding work that led to their gold medals. Watching them win was thrilling. But it's also cool to see the other countries win gold--Leon Marchand--the swimmer from France (and their hero at present), and Sarah Sjostrom--the swimmer from Sweden, just to name two. 

I haven't been an avid Olympics watcher for many years. I don't know why this year I'm suddenly more interested. The number of daily events is overwhelming, so there's no possibility to watch more than a couple of sporting events and go about one's day at the same time. I grew up in a home that watched the Olympics, especially swimming, diving, track and field, and gymnastics. The USA currently dominates the medal board; I read today that as of July 31, the USA leads the medal count with 30 medals, followed by France with 26 and China with 19. That number of course will change over the coming days, but it's good to see a truly united USA doing so well. I wish that would apply to its politics. 

I root for my country to win, but I also root for other countries. I've always done that, even when I was young. Norway's beach volleyball team (men) is winning its games and is poised to take a gold medal eventually. Norway will also do well once track and field starts, as they have some truly excellent runners. It will be interesting to see how the USA does when those events begin. 

There's a positivity surrounding all sports events that is refreshing in this day and age. Perhaps that is one reason I am enjoying the Olympics--it's not all doom and gloom. The world still manages to unite in this way every four years without aggression, accusations, non-sportsmanlike behavior, etc. I'd like to think it could carry over into daily life. I'm optimistic, but I'm a realistic optimist, or an optimistic pessimist. However you look at life, if you have some time, check out the Olympics. There's something for everyone. 

Street art in Oslo--July 2024

As you walk or drive down the road to Mathallen in Oslo, you will see a stone wall on your left side. This has been painted with different murals depicting different situations and moods. I've posted some of Oslo's street art in previous posts (A New Yorker in Oslo: Street art in Oslo (paulamdeangelis.blogspot.com); A New Yorker in Oslo: Some new street art in Oslo (paulamdeangelis.blogspot.com); A New Yorker in Oslo: More Street Art in Oslo (paulamdeangelis.blogspot.com); A New Yorker in Oslo: Street Art in Oslo III (paulamdeangelis.blogspot.com), but it's been a while since I've seen new street art. I'm not sure how long these murals have been here, but I really like them. I took some photos today so that you can make up your own minds. I'm happy to see the street art as long as it's not the boring ugly tagging that is tantamount to vandalism. Street art is done by talented people. 

My early July garden

I'm happy with my garden this year--happy with the way it looks, with the different plantings, with the perennials that have now grown high and wide. The latter take up space and fill in the gaps. I will probably need to divide some of them next year. Despite a chilly and rainy June, the garden is thriving. That's because it got off to a good start during May when it was warm and sunny. By warm I mean temperatures in the mid-70s. The pumpkins are the only plants that have been slow to grow. I doubt there will be many pumpkins this year, but there will be a good amount of zucchini, potatoes, and garlic. I tried two different kinds of garlic for the first time, and the plants are doing well. We picked a lot of strawberries and we'll have a lot of raspberries, gooseberries, black currants and red currants. I'm especially looking forward to harvesting the black raspberries; they always take longer to ripen than the regular red and yellow raspberries. 

As far as flowers go, I experimented a bit and put together flowers that I might not have put together otherwise. I cut down on vegetable growing since our growing season is so short, and used the extra space to plant an allium garden, which the bees love. I also planted astilbe, anemones, cornflowers, dahlias, lilies, sanvitalia, and rose mallows in the vicinity of the allium plants, and bladder campion flowers (wild) have grown up in the vicinity as well. It's a nice mixture of different flowers. Plus I had planted loosestrife a few years ago, and it has just taken off, so I'll have to control its growth in the coming years. But it's lovely. 

My garden is my happy place, and it's where you'll find me most days when the sun shines. Here are some recent photos......

the beautiful loosestrife

black raspberries growing in a cluster 

Words to live by

I love this.....

Birds and city living

You might think that living in a city would mean less frequent encounters with birds. You'd be wrong at least where Oslo is concerned. Summer in the city means visits from pigeons, sparrows, magpies, crows, wagtails, brown thrushes, blackbirds, mallard ducks, and seagulls. On my eight-minute walk to my garden from home, I pass Kiellands plass, which has become a sort of bird haven. There are people who feed the birds there each morning, but what most attracts them are the series of small ponds formed by the waterfalls that cascade down from the main fountain area on Waldemar Thranes gata. These are the watering holes for the mallard ducks and seagulls, but you'll find plenty of pigeons, wagtails and sparrows frequenting the same areas. The mallard ducks that come actually raise their families here; in previous years it was not unusual to see a mother with the ducklings running along behind her or swimming in the small ponds. I love seeing the birds each day. I often think that a world without birds would not be enjoyable to live in. 

Our co-op apartment has a fire balcony facing out from the kitchen to the street; we cannot use it and there is no door out to it, but the pigeons, sparrows and magpies are there each morning, waiting for their food. There is one pigeon especially (we've named him Chester but we're not sure if it's a he or a she pigeon) that shows up each morning and several times during the day. He sits on the metal ledge outside the kitchen windows and peers in, and we wonder what he is actually seeing. One thing is for sure--he arrives the minute he sees any sort of life in the kitchen in the morning. Sometimes he is already there when we get up, waiting for us. He has been known to tap on the window a few times during the past couple of years to announce his presence. We feed him as well as the other birds. 

Our apartment also has another balcony that we can use; that one leads out from our bedroom and faces out onto the inner courtyard. It is in close proximity to a large tree that is currently at the height of the fourth-floor balcony (we're on the third floor). The magpies choose this tree each year to build their nest and raise their family; we think it is the same magpie couple that return each year to to so. They are known for being territorial, and it's funny to watch and hear them squawk and talk to each other, as well as warn each other and other birds about the local cats that wander the neighborhood. God help those cats. The past two years, the magpies have had problems with their nests remaining sitting in the tree due to the storms and high winds that have suddenly become rather prevalent here in Oslo. Last year the branch on which their nest sat actually cracked and fell to the ground; there were no baby birds last year. This year the nest itself fell out of the tree. Luckily, the baby birds were already grown and had learned to fly. But the parents are now scouting around for a safer location, and the other day I caught them on the balcony, checking it out. They know we are kind because we do not shoo them away when we see them. It will be interesting to see how far they take their 'new project'. The other morning, I awoke very early, it must have been around 6 am, and looked out our bedroom window. There was one of the baby magpies, perched on the rim of one of the lounge chairs sitting out there. I wondered if he was sick or not feeling well, but it turned out he was sleeping! I know that because suddenly his little head came out from under his right wing where he had tucked it, and he yawned. He then promptly buried his head under his right wing again and went back to sleep. I'd never considered before how magpies (or any birds) actually sleep, so this was new to me. I took a few photos of him sleeping there outside our bedroom window. I had to take them through the window so as not to disturb him. Shortly thereafter, his parents showed up, there was some squawking back and forth, and he reluctantly followed his parents as they flew away. I think he actually enjoyed sleeping there on the chair. He hasn't been back since, but I'm guessing that he will return at one point. I won't feed them on that balcony because it will only attract them and more birds and I know that the co-op board won't like it, but it amazes me how birds and other wildlife are becoming used to us. They know that the majority of us are not bad people and that we mean them no harm. It's more than peaceful coexistence at this point, it's a remarkably enjoyable coexistence. 

Driving in downtown Oslo will drive you insane

Recently, my husband purchased a new electric bike at a store that just happens to be located in downtown Oslo. He asked me if I would drive him there because there are new traffic restrictions due to the closing of Ring 1 (the innermost traffic ring) and the bus routes have been changed. Additionally he's still getting over a sprained ankle and walking long distances would be uncomfortable, so I told him I would drive him. We both know what that entails. Generally speaking, we stay as far away from downtown Oslo as possible, at least where driving is concerned. And we've lived here for over thirty years. 

People don't believe me when I tell them that I'd rather drive in Manhattan or on the NJ Turnpike out to Newark Airport than drive in downtown Oslo. I've driven in Manhattan for years, have made my share of mistakes, but have always had the chance to turn right or left at the next traffic light and circle around the block. It helps that much of Manhattan is designed as a grid, with clearly-defined blocks, streets, and avenues. Not Oslo. It's an old city, so you would think they would cut motorists some slack for exactly that reason. You would think that they would allow for driving mistakes. They do not. After fifteen minutes of dealing with two-way streets that become one-way streets, streets that are only for bicycles and pedestrians, streets that are only for buses, trams and taxis, streets where you can't make a left in order to turn around--you're ready to vomit. I mean that literally. You're driving at the same time as you're trying to interpret all of the idiotic symbols for bikes, cars, trams, etc. You're left wondering where to go and how to get where you want to go. You consider pulling over to the curb and just abandoning your car. On my way home the other day, a trip that should take no more than ten minutes took me thirty minutes. I was on a road out of the city, after having passed the Opera and the Central Train Station, when I finally decided to make an illegal U-turn so that I could turn around. This, after having passed signs that prohibited me from making left and right turns. The only way I could proceed was forward. Both my husband and I agree that driving in downtown Oslo will make you nauseous because of the high level of anxiety and because your heart is constantly in your mouth. Driving in downtown Oslo will drive you insane, or if not insane, it will give you a heart attack and/or destroy whatever peace of mind you had at the start of the day. It's not for the fainthearted. 

Of course we're dealing with the Green Party when we talk about driving in Oslo. The Green Party doesn't want us to drive at all and has made it as difficult as possible with all of the restrictive traffic regulations and policies. Their stated goal is to rid the city of cars from the downtown area up to and including traffic Ring 2 by 2025. The level of insanity that currently exists will ensure that happens. People will give up rather than fight. The Green Party would rather you used bicycles, scooters, buses, and trams to get around. All well and good if Norway wasn't a winter country almost half the year. All well and good if public transportation worked every time you got on a bus or tram or train. I don't think they care too much that the downtown area stores will suffer from restrictive traffic policies. Delivery trucks will have a hard time (they complain already) delivering goods to stores. I guess the Green Party thinks that we should sit on our rear ends all day at all of the wonderful cafes that can be found in all of the closed-off pedestrian-only streets, drinking cappuccinos and eating pastries and gaining weight. Oh wait, you can do that in good conscience as long as you get back on your electric bike to bike home. 

I don't know what tourists think, but I can guess. My husband thinks driving in England on the left side of the road is easier than driving in downtown Oslo. If I was a tourist, I would do my homework and not rent a car in Oslo. There's no point. I'm not even sure I would rent a car to drive from Oslo out into the countryside. You need to know what you're doing--how to get out of the city and how to get back. Yes, we have Google Maps, Maps, Waze, etc. to help us. I don't know how much they will help, to be honest. Driving in Oslo approaches nightmare status. Bergen is no better. Who wants or needs the aggravation?

Life is brighter with good friends

Life is brighter with good friends, long-time friends--those with whom you've been friends since childhood. I'm lucky to have such friends (Jean and Maria); I know that to be true in the core of my being and I'm grateful every day for them. I'm not sure whether it has to do with luck or good decision-making or just plain old liking certain people. All I know is that they've stuck with me through thick and thin and I've done the same with them. I can't imagine my life without them. 

We've all made different choices and gone in different directions: marriage and having children, marriage and having a stepchild, and remaining single but being an aunt. Grandchildren are now in the picture and that's a new phase for all of us, with different degrees of involvement in terms of seeing them and taking care of them. But in between the new responsibilities, we find time to get together and to travel together. 

This past week, they came to Oslo and we spent a fun week together just hanging out, talking, snacking, and eating well. It reminded me of when we were young and had (what seemed to be) all the time in the world to hang out with each other. In 2019, before the pandemic, we met in Scotland and traveled around the country for a week. We had a wonderful time. Wales is now on the travel list and I hope we make it there within the next year or two. London would definitely be a good future destination, as would Amsterdam, Paris and Rome. We'll see what time brings in terms of travel possibilities for us all. 

Any time I feel out of sorts, I think of my friends and what we've shared together--good times and sad times (sickness and death). Maria's mother died recently, Jean lost her brother in 2023, and I lost my brother in 2015. They have their days too when they feel out of sorts. It's hard to keep your chin up sometimes when faced with the chaos and meanness in the world. And there's a lot of both these days. But my world brightens when I think of them and/or talk to them. Our friendship is a constant in our ever-changing lives. It gives me hope and peace of soul.  

Some good quotes about friendship

 

You say you love your country, but.......

Most people would tell you that they love their country, hands down. Most people don't even think about whether they do or not. And I'm sure most people who say they love their country, do love it on some level. But not on all levels. If they truly loved their country, they wouldn't do the following:

a) Litter. I walk around the city of Oslo and am often appalled at the amount of litter on the sidewalks and streets. Empty soiled plastic food containers here and there; empty and soiled paper bags likewise. Smashed bottles after Friday night parties. Or empty beer bottles just standing on the sidewalk or at door entrances. The same, just on a larger scale, after music festivals and outdoor concerts. Are people so lazy that they can't put their trash in a garbage can? I guess so. Lazy entitled spoiled brats. 

b) Dog poop bags. This is more litter that some folks leave lying around instead of placing in the trash can. Place the bags in the trash can, for God's sake. To your credit, at least you got halfway and placed the poop in the bag. Now place the bag in the trash can. Your dogs are not going to do it for you. 

c) Tagging. Tagging is not graffiti. Tagging is not art. Tagging is nonsensical behavior perpetrated by entitled spoiled brats who go around at night defacing the facades of apartment buildings, office buildings, and restaurants. I don't care how important you think you are, you're not. You're annoying individuals who ruin the beauty around us. 

d) Using sidewalks for biking or e-scootering. Not only is this behavior rude and uncalled for, but it is extremely dangerous. Not for those doing the biking or scootering, but for those who have the right of way on the sidewalks and yet find themselves pushed to the side as the bikes and scooters whiz by. Because if you don't move, you'll get hit and will definitely get injured. Older people, handicapped people, blind people don't stand a chance. Where are the police? As usual, nowhere in sight for this type of behavior. It's not punished or prioritized as a problem. So on the sidewalks, it's every man and woman for himself. I have begun to speak rudely to those who ride on the sidewalks when they should be riding in the road. I don't want to hear your excuses. Just get off the sidewalks. 

These are just some of the behaviors that irritate me no end. They are indicative of the lack of caring for others in society. They are indicative of our narcissistic me-first, go-screw-yourself society. The lack of civility and kindness is a huge societal problem. We could come a long way toward improving things if people stopped littering, tagging, and biking/scootering on the sidewalks. How about it people? What's it going to take for you to truly love your country and your fellow man or woman? I don't care a whit about your show of patriotism on your independence day and about your proclamations that your country is the best in the world. If you don't take care of your country and its inhabitants by behaving well, then your patriotism is just for show. Unfortunately, I've concluded that it's just for show. 

The sights, sounds and smells of summer

The sights, sounds, and smells of summer are many. Freshly-mown grass lawns, the many different kinds of birds chirping and singing, the smell of tar-soaked boardwalks at Playland and the smell of coconut sunscreen on beachgoers are just a few of the sights, sounds, and smells that are a part of my childhood summers. It didn't get dark until close to 9:30 pm in Tarrytown. Each year on July 4th, Tarrytowners would gather at the Washington Irving Junior High School to watch the fireworks that illuminated the sky over the Hudson River. A band would play until it got dark, and then the fireworks would start. 

The appearance of the ice cream truck driving through Oslo neighborhoods and playing the intro song to Norge Rundt signal that summer is here, even though the season doesn't officially start for another two weeks. I saw and heard the truck today for the first time, and even though the weather here is far from summer weather, it made me happy to hear it. Because it brings me back to my childhood, when Eddie the ice cream man would show up with his truck in our Tarrytown neighborhood. Back then, children would line up to buy ice cream bars and cones from him. I don't remember how much they cost, but it didn't matter, it was a treat to buy a toasted almond bar or an ice cream sandwich. As I did way back when, I went down to the stopped truck today and bought a box of ice cream sandwiches and a box of raspberry popsicles. 

There is a certain relaxation built into the summer months that comes from the sun and warmth. I need a dose of both in order to survive winter. I dread the coming of winter and cold when the summers have been chilly and rainy, like last year. This past winter was horrible to say the least. I hope that is not the case this year, but the weather patterns are so unstable at present that there is no longer any guarantee that the summer will be warm and sunny. We had a very warm and sunny May, but since June began, the weather has turned chilly and rainy. Everything seems to be out of whack at present. But hearing the ice cream truck today restored some kind of sanity and balance to life. I couldn't even begin to tell you why. It's enough for me to know that something as simple as an ice cream truck could bring me joy. Simple pleasures.....

Drowning in news

I found this recent Pearls Before Swine strip rather apt, considering that we're bombarded with news at every turn. It is depressing to drown in the news, and the end result is that one stops caring about what is going on in the world in order to deal with it. It is impossible to care about every problem in the world. 

The sheer amount of news is overwhelming, and sometimes one just wants to yell--'make it stop'. Or, 'stop the world, I want to get off'. Wars here and there, the threat of nuclear war, major crime in large cities here in Europe and the US, gun and knife violence, car burnings, terrorism, migrant crises here in Europe and the US, climate change (increased number and intensity of storms everywhere), rising sea levels, foods that are bad for you, household products that are bad for you, air pollution, dying oceans, inflation, prices that have skyrocketed, families that can't pay their bills, the threat of AI, the addiction to and obsession with technology (cell phones especially), weird politics everywhere, the upcoming US presidential election, the warping of truth and facts--the list is endless. The obsession with wealth. Greed and more greed. Power-hungry politicians and leaders. The move toward autocracy in Europe and the US. 

We live in decaying societies. Every time one turns around, more pieces of the foundations that support the societies we know and grew up in are crumbling. What we experienced and enjoyed as children in our generation is slowly being replaced by a new brand of society--driven by technological influences and AI (via internet). It's not hard to understand that some people want to live 'off the grid' rather than be 'guided and controlled' by AI platforms that specific companies tell us exist only to help us. Who believes this crap? The AI platforms being rolled out by the major internet and social media companies exist only to rake in more money for the advertisers on these platforms. The deals between the internet and social media companies with the advertisers are likely quite lucrative. Money talks. Money is the goal, and anything that gets them to the goal is justifiable (in their eyes). 

A half hour of news per day--that sounds good to me. Ten minutes a day would be better. We're being brainwashed into thinking that we need to be updated 24/7. We don't. Our personal and family lives would be much better and healthier if we just shut out the 24/7 news coverage. It's an obsession and an addiction, folks, like any other obsession and addiction. You will never get enough, because it's not designed that way. You get hooked and have to have it. You will need your news fix every day for the rest of your life unless you go cold turkey. Go cold turkey. Live your lives and don't let others tell you how you should think, feel or live. Stay updated without getting immersed in the sewage that passes for news. It's possible. 

 

If you read one article today, make it this one

I'm gifting my readers this article written by Thomas L. Friedman that was published yesterday in The New York Times--How We've Lost Our Moorings as a Society. It's an important opinion piece and it clearly resonated with many readers (just take a look at the Comments section). I hope the article makes you think about where the USA is going as a nation. We need to wake up before it's too late. Our future depends on it.

https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/28/opinion/trump-civility-society.html?unlocked_article_code=1.vk0.Maax.uk9wgGLn_2hg&smid=url-share

Looking back

I went through a nostalgic period around ten years ago, when I used a lot of time to sort through memories of childhood and young adulthood. It was a fairly creative time for me personally and led to my writing several books of poetry as well as several non-fiction books. My memoir about growing up in Tarrytown New York (A Town and A Valley: Growing Up in Tarrytown and the Hudson Valley: De Angelis, Paula Mary: 9798842022946: Amazon.com: Books) is my homage to a past that meant something to me personally; it was also was a reminder of a simpler time in my hometown's evolution. Tarrytown is no longer the town in which I grew up, nor would I expect it to be. But my childhood memories of it are quite alive in my heart and mind. I tap into them from time to time when I think about my parents, my family, my friends, and my old neighborhood. 

This morning, while I was getting ready for the day, I was reminded of my work past, more specifically, my experience working at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. Little did I know at that time (early 1980s) that it would change my life the way it did. Those changes were positive and far-reaching, but of course I couldn't know that at that time. I found myself thinking about my three bosses--Frank, Zbigniew, and Myron, and how much they supported and encouraged me to reach my full potential in the field of investigative cytology. It is thanks to them that I went on to pursue my doctorate in tumor biology. It is not without a tinge of wistfulness that I think of them; they have all passed away as of this writing. It's strange to think about that, that they are no longer with us. They were good men and immensely qualified professionally. I hope they know how much they meant to me, a young woman starting out in the work world. They gave me a real chance to succeed and I know that is not always the case. And I have no regrets about my work experiences with them. I can't say that about all my work experiences. I was lucky to get the start I got. There was something special about that time in my life. I would imagine all young people starting out in the work world feel that way; that their first years are formative years. They are. A good first work experience helps to shape one's later mindset about working. If the first experience is negative, it destroys trust in the future; I know several young people whose negative first work experiences destroyed their self-confidence. It took them several years to build up their self-image and to be able to trust a potential employer again. 

I don't look back too often anymore. There's far too much going on in the present time for me to dwell on what was or to miss the past. And even if I miss some aspects of the past, the pragmatic part of me knows that it's futile to focus on them. We can't go back, nor would I want to. The experiences of childhood, teenage years, and young adulthood are placed in memory and it is possible to go back to visit from time to time. My way of going back is often through music; I hear a song from those years and I am immediately transported back to those times. I know people who don't want to look back or be reminded at all of the past. That doesn't describe me, even though I wouldn't want to return to the past. The past has its place; the bad or sad things that happened then, happened. I moved on. And even if I had chosen not to 'move on', life would have moved me on anyway, whether I liked it or not.  

The slimy underbelly of everything

There is a slimy underbelly to everything. It is a consequence of our living in a fallen world. And make no mistake about it, we live in a fallen world. Random observations I've had this past week lend credence to this:

The USA is looking at re-electing a man who has cheated on his wife while she was pregnant, with a porn star and then paid said porn star hush money to keep her quiet. You can't make this stuff up. We've had philandering presidents before, but eventually they gave up trying to defend themselves and took the consequences (e.g. Bill Clinton). Imagine how social media would have crucified him when news of his affair came out? As it was, the news media did what they could to crucify him. You could wonder why these men do what they do? I'm not likely to get an answer to that question. 

The USA has a congress and a supreme court that are beholden to this man whom I call 'the mouth'. For some reason they are afraid of him. I guess because when he opens his mouth and badmouths someone, that person is cancelled for good. Bye bye political career. Hello harassment and more harassment. God bless Liz Cheney for speaking up about his bad behavior. I'd vote for her in a heartbeat. 

The USA does not have to remain a democratic country. There is nothing written anywhere that states that this is the case. I will miss my old country if it becomes an autocracy. If it becomes an autocracy due to 'the mouth', we will only have ourselves to blame. He's already talking about a third term in office. What does he think, that he'll live forever? Or will he appoint one of his children as his successor? I know what I'm praying for, but I'm keeping it a secret. It's my own underbelly.

And then there are the media reports about music moguls who abuse(d) their girlfriends and denied it, music moguls who rape(d) women and denied it, movie moguls and actors who did the same. But when the abuse shows up on a hotel surveillance video, suddenly the tune from some of these men is quite different. Men who abuse women are pathetic losers. But most importantly, they are criminals. Their behavior is criminal and they belong in jail. But of course the rich abusers will have a battery of lawyers to defend them. The rich always have a handy 'get out of jail free' card. 

The news is also filled with stories of celebrities on the verge of divorce, or those who have divorced, or those who are filing for divorce. Honestly, why do they bother getting married? Why have all these lavish over-the-top hyper-expensive weddings? What's the point? Just live together and stay out of the public eye. But that seems to be impossible for most of them due to their over-inflated egos. Stay off TikTok, X, Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat, YouTube or any other social media channel that exposes your life for all to see. Is it worth it? No. Learn to be private about your private life. 

I haven't read or heard about one feminist women's group that has come out and condemned the October 7th attacks on young Israeli women who were massacred at the hands of Hamas. Not one group. Prove me wrong, people. I find this abhorrent. If these women who were raped, mutilated, murdered and beheaded by Hamas were your daughters, sisters, mothers, friends, would you step up to the plate and condemn their actions? You are allowed to condemn Hamas and also be critical of Israel's revenge war. It is possible to have two viewpoints in your heads at the same time. But of course we live in the age of woke, so you can only adhere to one way of thinking, determined by the wokers, which at the present time is anti-Israel.  

The world is a mess. There is so much violence, lying, cheating, greed, abuse, bad behavior, misery. It boggles my mind that cheaters, for example, deny their cheating when it is blatantly obvious that they have cheated. I'm thinking of a female politician in Norway who basically plagiarized over forty percent of her master's degree, and when caught, did not apologize but rather blamed everyone else around her for pointing out that fact. She didn't cheat, she said. Oh well. What would you call it then? In my day, we called it cheating. These days, no matter the crime, we must always feel sorry for the perpetrator. I don't.

I would guess the world is in need of some kind of divine intervention. But I doubt that it will be a merciful one. We don't deserve it. 

Giving back to the world

I find this quote from Ursula Le Guin to be both intriguing and comforting. I really like the idea that one can give back to the world that gave each one of us life. It's an intriguing idea, and what's comforting about it is the knowledge that we belong to something much larger than ourselves. Also that we matter to the world, even in death. 

I think that when I die, I can breathe back the breath that made me live. I can give back to the world all that I didn't do. All that I might have been and couldn't be. All the choices I didn't make. All the things I lost and spent and wasted. I can give them back to the world. To the lives that haven't been lived yet. That will be my gift back to the world that gave me the life I did live, the love I loved, the breath I breathed. 

~Ursula K. Le Guin, from her book The Other Wind 

From winter to summer, just like that

We're now in summer mode here in Oslo, even though the summer season hasn't officially begun. All it takes is a few warm days when the sun shines brightly and the temperatures hover around 70 degrees F as they have done for the past few days. That's the signal for everyone to exit their apartments in order to be outdoors. Restaurants, cafes and bars with outdoor seating are packed and the lines of people waiting to be seated are long. 

I always enjoy this time of year--May and June--because those are the months when my garden takes off. Up until around two weeks ago, we were still experiencing chilly winds and chilly temperatures. And then suddenly, whoosh, they're gone, replaced by warmer temperatures that define summer in Norway. We rarely if ever get temperatures in the 90s, nor is it very humid here. That's good in one sense, because even though summers in New York were/are warm, they could often be brutal due to the humidity that made it hard to breathe. My family and friends in NY keep me updated on the weather there, among other things. Interestingly, we've had similar unstable weather patterns this year, especially in April--some chilly and windy days, followed by warm days, then chilly again. It's rained more there than here; last year we had a very wet July and August. We'll see what this year brings. 

I worked in the garden for the entire month of April, cutting down dead plants, pruning the fruit trees, cleaning and raking. I did some planting as well (potatoes) as well as starting seeds in the greenhouse. I'm always amazed each year at the miracle that is a garden. The perennials return at the same time every year (hence their name); you see the new growth amid the dead stems that have been cut down very low. The snowdrops, crocuses, daffodils, tulips, hyacinths and forsythia make their appearance in April and usually bloom until around mid-May. The forsythia bushes are now turning green. The magnolia tree is blooming, and I see buds on my wisteria. This past week I planted my zucchini and pumpkin seedlings outdoors; so far they're doing well. Night temperatures hover a round 45 degrees F, which is fine. As long as there is no frost, they'll survive. 

Here are some recent photos of the garden. Enjoy.......

Queen Bee

I play The New York Times Spelling Bee game each day. There are a set number of words that one must find (spell) each day given the letters for that day. If you make all of the words, you achieve Queen Bee status. It's not often that happens because most of the time it's impossible to find all the words. It's happened to me only once before. And then again today. Small things make me happy as today's spelling game was difficult. 

Out In The Country by Three Dog Night

Out in the Country by Three Dog Night is one of my favorite songs of all time. When I was in high school and learning how to make short movies to music for my English class (we had a very progressive teacher who was years ahead of MTV), I chose this song to make a movie to, starring my sister. The idea was that she was a teenager in an ugly city who dreamed of being out in the country. It was a real learning experience, planning the movie, shooting it, editing it, and presenting the final version. I loved the experience, and every time I hear this song, I think of that time in my life. 

Lyrics

Whenever I need to leave it all behind

Or feel the need to get away-ay-ay

I find a quiet place, far from the human race

Out in the country

Before the breathin' air is gone

Before the sun is just a bright spot in the night-time

Out where the rivers like to run

I stand alone and take back somethin' worth rememberin'

Whenever I feel them closing in on me

Or need a bit of room to move

When life becomes too fast, I find relief at last

Out in the country

Before the breathin' air is gone

Before the sun is just a bright spot in the night-time

Out where the rivers like to run

I stand alone and take back somethin' worth rememberin'

Before the breathin' air is gone

Before the sun is just a bright spot in the night-time

Out where the rivers like to run

I stand alone and take back somethin' worth rememberin'

Before the breathin' air is gone

Before the sun is just a bright spot in the night-time

Out where the rivers like to run

I stand alone and take back somethin' worth rememberin'

Before the breathin' air is gone

Before the sun is just a bright spot in the night-time

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Paul H. Williams / Roger S. Nichols

Out in the Country lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group

Easy To Be Hard--Three Dog Night

With all of the insanity and inhumanity in the world now, I just had to listen to Three Dog Night's version of Easy To Be Hard, the song from the 1967 rock musical Hair. Why oh why did we grow up with music like this, music that touched our hearts and souls, music that wasn't just about money, bling, greed, revenge and violence? How could it have happened that the 1960s and 70s were such idealistic times? We know now that they weren't always so, but the songs reflected the ideals, hopes and dreams of the songwriters. They wrote about what they knew, experienced and loved--relationships, love, growing up, living in society, and making their way through life. I miss this approach to life. It's all so aggressive and in your face now. 

Lyrics

How can people be so heartless?

How can people be so cruel?

Easy to be hard

Easy to be cold

How can people have no feelings

How can they ignore their friends

Easy to be proud

Easy to say no

Especially people who care about strangers

Who say care about evil and social injustice

Do you only care about the bleeding crowd

How about a needy friend

I need a friend

How can people be so heartless?

You know I'm hung up on you

Easy to give in

Easy to hold back

Especially people who care about strangers

Who care about evil and social injustice

Do you only care about the bleeding crowd

How about a needy friend?

We all need a friend

How can people be so heartless?

How can people be so cruel?

Easy to be proud

Easy to say no

You know it's e-

Easy to say no

Easy to say no

Easy to be proud

I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know

I know it is

Easy to say no

Easy to say no

It's easy

It's easy

Easy to say no, no, no

It's easy, it's easy, it's easy, it's easy

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Gerome Ragni / James Rado / Galt Mac Dermot

Easy to Be Hard lyrics © Emi U Catalog Inc., Channel H Productions

Living a small life

I read a short reflection today that made me think about several things. It said that we cannot shut ourselves away from the problems in the world, as much as we would like to. We cannot live small, safe, little lives away from it all, because we have to be a part of the world, we have to care about the world. That was the gist of it. I am not sure if I agree completely with this viewpoint; more about that shortly. I then thought about how the media want us to live our daily lives. They would like nothing better than that we lurch from one (media-created) crisis to another. There are enough real crises in the world without the media adding to them. But clickbait and ratings decide everything. 

Given the two different aspects mentioned above, I got to thinking about why I don't want to immerse myself wholeheartedly in the world's problems. Overall, some of them are more major than others, but what they have in common is that they swirl about in a cesspool, a cesspool of crime, greed, violence, brutality, corruption, hatred, cynicism, apathy--the list is long. And the media is happy to report every little aspect of it. Ad nauseam. Why would a person want to voluntarily immerse himself or herself in this cesspool each day? What does it do to one's psyche? The psychological effect cannot be good. 

Most of us live small, safe, little lives, away from the limelight. Most of us in fact shy away from the limelight, from public attention, from being scrutinized and dissected by the media. Having said that, I do admire anyone who genuinely wants to help society by becoming a politician. He or she knows from the get-go what they're in for. Politics is not for the fainthearted. But by and large, the majority of us will never experience such media scrutiny. By choice. 

So I don't agree that there is something wrong with wanting to live a small little life. One cannot make a blanket assumption that because a person's life is small, that he or she has not done something that counts here in this world. If that person has lived a good life, has been kind to others and to animals, has raised (or helped to raise) a family, has worked and contributed his or her talents, that should count toward the overall evaluation of his or her life. We who are outside that life cannot be the judge of how that life was lived. 

A small little life gives room for reflection, for peace, for quiet, for figuring out what is and what is not important. Lurching from one crisis to the next will not solve anything, will not provide the needed time for reflection. There is nothing wrong with wanting a small life. But whether life is big or small, it is never safe all the time, and it is futile to try to desperately keep it safe. Life is filled with risks that we must take in order to grow as individuals. They may not always lead down happy paths or safe ones. Life is also filled with personal crises; no one escapes. Some of those crises may force us out into the larger world; some may make us retreat even more from the world. I know people who have had debilitating neurological illnesses who preferred to retreat from the world. They felt that they had nothing to offer it anymore. In fact, they did, but their choices had to be respected. They did what they felt was best for them and their families. 

We are almost midway through an election year, a year that promises to be a chaotic one news-wise. Knowing this in advance, many of us are planning how to keep the media wolves at bay. How to keep them from invading our lives and homes. I understand that people want to do this. I want to do it too. 

Interesting viewpoint from Charles Bukowski

Charles Bukowski wrote this poem about rising early versus sleeping late.....

Throwing Away the Alarm Clock

my father always said, “early to bed and
early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy
and wise.”

it was lights out at 8 p.m. in our house
and we were up at dawn to the smell of
coffee, frying bacon and scrambled
eggs.

my father followed this general routine
for a lifetime and died young, broke,
and, I think, not too
wise.

taking note, I rejected his advice and it
became, for me, late to bed and late
to rise.

now, I’m not saying that I’ve conquered
the world but I’ve avoided
numberless early traffic jams, bypassed some
common pitfalls
and have met some strange, wonderful
people

one of whom
was
myself—someone my father
never
knew.

Dreaming of the garden

My latest poem--Dreaming of the Garden, copyright 2024 by Paula Mary De Angelis. All rights reserved.  

Last night
I dreamed of the garden
of its simple beauty 
that greets me 
when I arrive there 
early in the morning
when no one is there
except me

Crocuses and snowdrops
await me
along with honeybees
that have discovered both
buzzing from flower to flower
in the sun that warms them 
and me for a few afternoon hours

Yesterday I happened upon
a little robin 
singing his heart out
loud and clear and unafraid
to anyone who would listen
I listened 
because he had something of importance to tell me
it’s spring and he wants a mate

I dream of my garden
a sanctuary, a place of worship
one with the divine 
perhaps by design
miracles happening before 
my eyes, wondrous
watching the ground for signs of life
feeling my soul align
with the miracles before me

I sleep and then I dream
of a garden that I create
anew each year 
in line with a kind of
divine design
my hands guided by a light
that has been there for centuries 
serenity

On walking

Above all, do not lose your desire to walk. Everyday, I walk myself into a state of well-being and walk away from every illness. I have walked myself into my best thoughts, and I know of no thought so burdensome that one cannot walk away from it. But by sitting still, and the more one sits still, the closer one comes to feeling ill. Thus if one just keeps on walking, everything will be all right. 

~Søren Kierkegaard

I try to get out to walk each day, and usually manage a couple of miles a day. I have my favorite routes; one of them is to walk around Sant Hanshaugen park, which is a lovely park not far from where we live. Other routes are along the Akerselva river--both north and south. Sometimes I just walk down to my garden and back; I've taken to having my phone in my pocket as I work in the garden and walk around it. You'd be surprised how much walking I do just in the garden. 

My mother was a great walker, and was well-known in Tarrytown for that. Many people used to stop and offer her rides home from the grocery store, but she politely declined. For her, getting out each day for her walk was a lifesaver. It gave her some needed free time, time for herself. I think she must have enjoyed that--getting some free quiet time away from the hustle and bustle of family life. Sometimes she let us children tag along if we begged her long enough, but most times not. And that was ok with us, as she always returned with candy or comic books for us to enjoy. 

I haven't always been a walker. I became one in earnest about fifteen years ago, when I decided that having to sit each workday in a shared cramped office was no longer what I wanted to do. I started to end my workdays around 3:30 or 4:00 pm and left work early to walk home. A two-mile walk. I would put my headphones on and listen to music on my phone. Doing this was great training, and started me down the road of wanting to be outdoors whenever I could. It's one of the reasons I dislike winter intensely in this city, as I've written about in previous posts. It's very difficult to get out and walk when the sidewalks are sheets of ice. If they weren't, I might like winter a little more. 

Whenever I am on vacation in a new place, I get out and walk around. My husband enjoys this too, so we have explored many new cities this way. As long as I can be mobile, I'm happy. I don't need to ski, go to the gym, or any other such thing. If I can walk each day, I'm happy. I agree with Søren Kierkegaard; I begin to feel ill if I can't get out for my walk. The cure is free--walking. I've become my mother, at least in that respect. 

The daily struggle

Rather apt in these strange times, from Pearls Before Swine. The dilemma--how to remain a decent person in the midst of the idiocy that accosts us each day. Always a struggle. 

The surreal world we live in

Holy Week for Christians starts on Palm Sunday (one week before Easter Sunday) and ends on Holy Saturday; it includes Holy Thursday and Good Friday, and is certainly not considered to be a happy week. Easter Sunday, which celebrates the resurrection of Christ, is a joyful day. 

Donald Trump has come out and wished Christians a 'happy holy week'. If he knew anything about Christianity, he'd know that it is not a happy week. He used the occasion to hawk the bible he is selling. Not just any bible, mind you, but a 'God Bless the USA' bible: Donald Trump is selling a 'God Bless the USA' Bible for $60 : NPR. Sixty dollars for a bible. It must be quite a special bible. The money earned from sales will go where? Into his pockets of course. The man is in desperate need of money as it turns out. What better way to make money than to prey on the consciences and faith of his followers. 

I don't get it. I really just don't get it. What is it going to take for people to see DT for what he is? Or don't his followers care? It is impossible that some of them don't care. They do, and they vote for him anyway. I know that God has used murderers and unsavory types to do his will way back when, but they saw the error of their ways, converted first and followed him (consider the life of St. Paul, who persecuted the early Christians before he converted and joined them). I don't see DT doing this. He isn't following God, he thinks he is God. Or he thinks he's been sent from God to save the USA. It's pathetic. 

We are headed down a slippery slope toward a future that no one will find appealing. Absolutely no one, not even DT's followers eventually. When they finally have to admit that they've been hoodwinked by a huckster, a con artist, a self-serving salesman. As the old saying goes, there's a sucker born every minute. Unfortunately. 

The world we live in

 A little humor to brighten your day from one of my favorite comic strips--Non Sequitur.......

Book promotion

It's time again for some book promotion. It's a necessary part of being a writer, whether you've published via a publishing house or gone the self-publishing route. From what I understand, many writers who have published their books via large publishing houses find themselves in the same predicament as me--having to promote their books themselves. Publishing houses require it. So even though some of the downsides of self-publishing are that you have to wear all of the job hats yourself, it heartens me to know that had I published in a traditional fashion, I'd still be expected to promote my books. I've learned quite a bit by publishing my books myself, being responsible for, with some few exceptions--writing, editing, designing a book cover (I've gotten excellent help with that), publishing on a digital platform (the excellent Kindle Direct Publishing platform), book marketing and promotion. I've run ads for my books using Amazon and Facebook; I also have a Books by Paula M De Angelis Facebook page. I've also exhibited one of my books at the international annual Frankfurt Book Fair held in Germany. I have a website as well as this blog, and I use both to give updates about my books. 

The first book that I ever published has been the one that has sold the most of all of the books that I've published. The subject matter--passive aggressive leaders--clearly struck a nerve with many readers. It sold very well for a first-time author, from all of the articles I've read about what one can expect to earn from a first book. So that was and still is encouraging. 

My Amazon Author Page: Amazon.com: Paula M. De Angelis: books, biography, latest update

My blog: A New Yorker in Oslo (paulamdeangelis.blogspot.com)

My website: PM De Angelis - Updates (paulamdeangelis.com)

To my many readers who read this blog each day, thank you for your support. Please check out my books; you won't be disappointed. 

Tears For Fears - Sowing The Seeds Of Love

Another favorite that inspires me everytime I hear it. Enjoy!

Tears For Fears - Shout (Official Music Video)

I call this the primal scream song. At least that's how it was for me when I first heard it in 1984. There was so much turmoil in my life at that time. I would often just drive around the area where I grew up and if this song came on the car radio, I'd turn up the volume and just sing at the top of my lungs. 

Tears for Fears remains one of my all-time favorite bands. There are so many catchy riffs in their songs that draw you in and never let go. Even now, forty years later, I'm still hooked on their songs. Next one up (in the next post) is Sowing the Seeds of Love, another favorite. 

Trying to understand the mystery of life

Apropos my last post, where I talked about accepting some things in this life (like my faith) that I know I will never understand on this earth; Henry Miller wrote about his way of looking at the world and trying to understand the mystery of life. He came to the conclusion that he would never understand everything, but that didn't stop him from trying. That's a beautiful way of looking at the world. 

He wrote: 

I have a theory that the moment one gives close attention to anything, even a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself. I have tried this experiment a thousand times and I have never been disappointed. The more I look at a thing, the more I see in it, and the more I see in it, the more I want to see. It is like peeling an onion. There is always another layer, and another, and another. And each layer is more beautiful than the last.

This is the way I look at the world. I don't see it as a collection of objects, but as a vast and mysterious organism. I see the beauty in the smallest things, and I find wonder in the most ordinary events. I am always looking for the hidden meaning, the secret message. I am always trying to understand the mystery of life.

I know that I will never understand everything, but that doesn't stop me from trying. I am content to live in the mystery, to be surrounded by the unknown. I am content to be a seeker, a pilgrim, a traveler on the road to nowhere. ~Henry Miller

(from Henry Miller's book: Black Spring)

Odds and ends, part two

As I get older, I am more willing to accept that I won't get the answers I seek, particularly where faith is concerned. Faith is a mystery that I will never truly decipher. My faith in God has wavered from time to time up through the years. Ditto for my desire to attend Sunday mass. But I've realized that I won't get firm proof that God exists; he/she is not going to suddenly appear before me (like in the story of doubting Thomas) and convince me that way. So I accept God's existence on faith. Attending mass is similar; I go, no matter how I feel. Ten to fifteen years ago, I often wondered why I should go to mass when so many things seemed to be topsy-turvy in my life and definitely in the world. Not anymore. It's become something I do without thinking about it too much. That works for me. I like being there, being part of something larger than me. Being together with (presumably) like-minded people, in the sense that they are also believers. Even if they aren't, it wouldn't change my wanting to be there. I've realized that I can just offer up who I am on any given day--happy, sad, moody, bored, angry, irritable--and hope that I am acceptable. Being human means being imperfect. That is my reality, even though I try hard each day to be the best version of myself (as Matthew Kelly says). 

I watched the film Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret from 2023 last night. It's a touching, funny and sweet story about a twelve-year old girl on the cusp of adolescence, and how she deals with life at home and in school. The film is based on the book of the same name by Judy Blume; I never read it when it was published back in 1970. Margaret is the daughter of an interfaith marriage--Jewish father and Catholic mother, but neither of her parents are religious and they have chosen to raise Margaret without any religious affiliation. She does however hope to eventually find some sort of religion to belong to. She is assigned a school project that allows her to explore different religious beliefs, which she hopes will give her some idea of what religion to eventually embrace. She does talk to God however, telling him about all the things that are happening in her life and sharing her joys as well as disappointments. Abby Ryder Fortson did a wonderful job as Margaret, as did Rachel McAdams as her mother and Kathy Bates as her grandmother.

I also watched the film Dog from 2022 with Channing Tatum the other night--also very good. He played a former Army Ranger suffering from PTSD who wants to return to military duty but whose superiors deny him that chance due to his condition. However, he agrees to bring his former partner's dog Lulu to his funeral (he has committed suicide) as part of a deal for him to return to active duty. Lulu is anxiety-ridden and aggressive (suffering from a kind of PTSD too) and destined for eventual euthanization, and the trip from Oregon to Arizona is fraught with different problems and troubles along the way. It's a beautiful story about the bond that forms between man and dog, and how they both save each other. 

I've spent the past four days without tv news of any kind to invade my life. Bliss. I don't want to know what's going on in the world because I know it's the same old, same old--wars, aggression, conflicts, shootings, murders, political divisiveness--the list is long. And the news media love reporting it all; sometimes I get the feeling that 'the worse, the better'. I know that's cynical, but hey, the news media are cynical institutions. You get back what you give. 

I haven't been on social media much either. Also bliss. I don't really miss it. As I've written about before, I'd remove myself from most of it if it wasn't for the fact that friends in the US still use it. It's a way of staying in touch with them, although these days we mostly chat via Messenger and WhatsApp. 

The scowlers

I could have entitled this post The Scowls. The furious looks. The dissatisfied men. Two angry men--Donald Trump and Tucker Carlson. Because they are angry. But why are they angry? What do they have to be angry about? They are two very wealthy men. They are privileged. They live in a rareified atmosphere that few will ever experience. They don't have to get their hands dirty. They can do what they want when they want. Tucker Carlson once worked for Fox News until he cost them more than they could reasonably defend. Ah yes, Donald Trump--well, what is there to say? He speaks for the common man, Donald Trump does. He knows what it's like to walk into a grocery store and pay through the nose for food. He knows what it's like to struggle to pay a mortgage. He knows what it's like to be a common everyday man or woman. 

I am simultaneously fascinated and repelled by their public displays of anger. Who are these men fooling? Certainly not me. When I look at these photos, I have to laugh. Can you imagine having to live with them? Wake up with them each day, looking at their sour pusses? Dealing with their feigned anger? Heaven forbid. And yet, people are drawn in by their theatrics. They believe their empty promises and lies. 

These two men come to mind whenever I need good examples of grumpy old men and scowlers. They've perfected the art of scowling. I'm not sure if Trump's scowling will net him a second term. Carlson has more to scowl about after his embarrassing interview with Putin and his debacle at Fox. But why doesn't their wealth make them smile? Since they're all about the money, I would have thought their money would have made them happy, much like Scrooge and Scrooge McDuck. 

Perpetually-angry people bring to mind the Aesop fable The Boy Who Cried Wolf. The shepherd boy kept 'crying wolf' (lying) about a wolf attacking his sheep, and the townspeople always rushed to help him.  But when he cried wolf once too often, they got tired of his false alarms. One day a wolf really did show up to attack and devour the sheep and the townspeople ignored his cries for help. Perpetually-angry people should realize that their constant yelling will make others lose interest and sympathy. Maybe some people like listening to the same manic complaining every day, but most of us don't. We learn to ignore them and their anger. As a friend of mine used to say to her husband (now ex-husband) when he yelled at her for trivial reasons--'I don't hear you any better when you yell'. I feel the same way. If you raise your voice to me, I quietly consider my options. I can tune you out while you're yelling; I'm a master at it from my schooldays. Or I can leave the room. I simply don't want to hear what you have to say. And that includes angry politicians and tv personalities and their nonsense.